Student Life | Sex Issue

Transcription

STUDENT LOVE
the o f f icial newspaper of ♥ at Washing ton Universit y in St . L ouis since eighteen sevent y-eight
Valentine’s Day Special
www.studlife.com
Friday, Februar y 13, 2009
Sex Issue
2009
MATT MITGANG AND EVAN WIISKUP | STUDENT LIFE
X2 STUDENT LOVE | NEWS
♥
FRIDAY | FEBRUARY 13, 2009
This data is based on the responses of 1727 undergraduate students to a survey administered by e-mail between
Monday, February 9 and Wednesday, February 11. The e-mail was sent to the entire student body.
more than 1 time a week, 42.18%
2-3 times a month, 20.31%
37.72%
I am still a virgin
vi in
2-3 times a semester, 11.56%
less than 1 time a year, 8.07%
younger
ounger than 16
1 time a month, 6.41%
17-18
2-3 times a year, 4.66%
1 time a year, 3.50%
19-20
1 time a semester, 3.30%
21 or older
0
5
10
15
20
25
30
35
40
80
Always, 72.35%
70
Often, 13.68%
60
Occasionally, 4.26%
50
40
Rarely, 3.17%
30
Never, 6.54%
20
10
0
86.71%
both sides say it's a date
we go to a fancy restaurant/ente
64.79%
64.12%
rt ainment ve nu e
one par tner treats the other
52.36%
18.19%
we spend the night in m y dorm roo m
dinner at Center Cour
10.41%
t/Bear's Den/V illage Commons
0
you are hooking up with an individu
20
40
60
80
25.07%
al on a regular basis
90.22%
you are ex clusi ve
you go on dates regularly with an individ
your F ac ebook status says y
ou are “in a relationshi
100
56.00%
ua l
p”
26.19%
8.03%
something else
0
20
40
60
80
100
♥
X3
sexual health
sex at school
BUSINESS
MATT MITGANG | STUDENT LIFE
MATT MITGANG | STUDENT LIFE
EVAN WISKUP | STUDENT LIFE
ART
ARCHITECTURE
ENGINEERING
Heart-Shaped Pizza!
February 4th-15th, 2009
in
d th e
e
p
-Sha with on te
t
r
a
He pizza
cola
o
h
t
crus g and C hts*
in
elig
topp astry D
P
.99
$14
*Offer good with one
e
Sweetreat or one order
rder of
Chocolate Pastry Delights
elights
ARTSCI
Expires Feb. 15, 2009. Offer good for a limited time at participating
Papa John’s restaurants only. Additional toppings extra. Not valid
with any other coupons or discounts. Limited delivery area,
charges may apply. Customer responsible for all applicable taxes.
Two H
ear
thin cr t-Shaped
us
with on t pizzas
e topp
ing
$19.99
Chocolate
Pastry Delights!
News Editor / Ben Sales / [email protected]
At WU, students labor, sacrifice
for long-distance relationships
David Song
Managing Editor
Two summers ago, when Washington University senior Sean Fellows met Jordan Pennington, a junior at the University of Michigan,
the two Des Moines natives never
imagined they would begin a long-
distance relationship.
“I know how that absurd that
sounds,” observed Fellows, who
formally met Pennington at a funeral. “Our parents were like,
‘Sean and Jordan would be so
cute together.’ Both of us thought,
‘That is such a stupid idea.’”
Fellows and Pennington had
only known each other through
the church both their families attended.
The two surprised themselves
when they formed a deep rapport
after Fellows, who had not been
in a serious relationship before at
Washington University, asked the
University of Michigan student on
several dates.
“Each of us liked the other as
more than a friend, but we couldn’t
say it, because we both had this
feeling that it was impossible to
be together,” Fellows said.
By winter break, Fellows and
Pennington decided—with trepidation—to initiate their long-distance relationship.
Washington University senior
Kenzie Allen also met her longdistance boyfriend Aaron Trimble,
now an oil landman, at their hometown Midland, Texas. Though Allen and Trimble were “high school
sweethearts,” they resumed dating
last Thanksgiving after a threeyear separation. Allen cited greater maturity of both partners as one
of the reasons for their new relationship.
“Probably, it wouldn’t be working out, if we weren’t adults by
now,” Allen said.
Freshmen Eric Teng and Nicole
Chu from Buffalo Grove, Ill., who
respectively attend Washington
University and Case Western University, attended the same junior
high and high schools, and began dating in the middle of their
sophomore year. When the couple
began looking at colleges, the two
resolved not to allow college applications to affect their relationship.
Teng was accepted into Washington University, but Chu was
placed on the University’s waitlist. The couple decided to maintain their relationship after leaving
Buffalo Grove for college.
“We were confident we could
make it,” Teng said.
Serious commitment, physical
meetings help bridge the gap
PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY EVAN WISKUP | STUDENT LIFE
Long phone conversations are among the many hallmarks of University students’ long-distance relationships.
Like Fellows and Pennington,
Allen and Trimble communicate
daily with each other through
telephone calls, e-mails and text
messages. Last year during spring
break, after Fellows and Pennington had been dating for about two
months, Fellows discovered he
had sent 700 text messages—well
over his base limit of 50.
“It’s hard because a lot of
the expression is limited by how
you’re able to facilitate it,” Allen
said. “You can tell someone you
love them on Skype, but pixels
aren’t the same as holding the person. What you have to do for that
is visit each other as often as possible.”
When their relationshp began,
Fellows and Pennington resolved
to try to visit each other about
once a month.
See DISTANCE, page 6
Professor-student
couplings remain
awkward fantasies
Professor crushes are common on
campus, but dating is rare
Becca Krock
Staff Reporter
If the Washington University
student body had a Facebook profile, its relationship status would
be “It’s complicated” when it
comes to professors.
When most people think of
student-professor relationships,
the kind of advances that come
to mind are those that can force
faculty to resign. But the University’s official policy allows these
relationships to exist, as long as
the professor does not exercise
academic power over the student,
or as long as the professor officially removes himself or herself
from that power. This policy thus
creates the possibility of legitimate flirting and dating.
Despite the potential for awkwardness, many students said
they would be comfortable with
the idea.
“I think if you talk to the average student, they’d be comfortable with the concept if the professor wasn’t in a position to give
you a grade or better you somehow,” said one student who asked
not to be named.
Students say that while real
advances and dating are rare, it
is common to be attracted to and
develop crushes on teachers. One
student knew a professor who often attracted crushes, although “it
was very one-sided.”
“She’s the kind of teacher
who, through no strategy of her
own, attracts a lot of student attention, which I don’t think begins as a crush, but sort of fervently becomes one,” the student
said. “We start talking about her
and the whole physiological thing
happens, with the pupils and the
breathing.”
Junior Eddy Lazzarin was enthusiastic about the prospect of
becoming more intimate with his
teacher.
“I do have a really f------ hot
professor, but no sexy anecdotes,” replied Lazzarin when
asked whether he had ever flirted
with a professor. Jesus, I wish I
did.”
One of the most discussed
threads on the recently-terminated gossip Web site JuicyCampus.
com is dedicated to “Hottest Male
Professors,” with 15 apparently
serious nominations for “truly
bangable male profs.”
So why don’t more people tell
their professors how they feel?
“A lot of times it’s joking,
like, ‘Oh my God, this professor
is so cute,’ but not in a practical,
actual sense. In a practical, actual
sense I think it would make [students] a little bit uncomfortable,”
junior Deva Estin said.
Student-professor
relationships can be uncomfortable because a professor may be an
authority figure or belong to an
older generation. Professors may
also be reluctant to become closer to their students, romantically
and otherwise, for fear of incurring sexual harassment charges.
One junior compared dating a
professor to dating a floormate or
someone with the same group of
friends—if drama occurs, it can
be dangerous.
On the other hand, dating a
professor may make sense when
shared interests often ignite amorous feelings.
“Having a crush on a professor can make you fall in love with
a subject,” the anonymous junior
said.
Dean Jami Ake, professor of
English and women and gender
studies, who serves as a co-chair
of the Committee on Sexual Assault, agreed that there is a potential connection between academic
and romantic interest.
“Even the vocabularies overlap. ‘I want you to be passionate about something. I want you
to be inspired by it,’” Ake said.
“It’s easy to see how that kind
of intense interest in somebody
and everything they stand for can
translate more in terms of passion.”
Ake said that navigating the
boundaries between close and
too-close relationships is difficult, in part because of the worry
that the student will feel uncomfortable or harassed.
“It’s at the extreme end that we
don’t know how to have a conversation about how to draw the line
that conserves regular, important,
close relationships with students
but also ensures that they’re the
empowered party and they have
all the tools that are necessary to
See COUPLING, page 5
The girl next door: Floorcest at WU
Johann Qua Hiansen
Contributing Reporter
Freshman Josh Berry of Eliot
Hall has a song with smooth, sensual tones, titled “Floorcest.”
“When I was thinking about
what I’m going to name it, I was
like ‘Let’s name it ‘Floorcest,’”
Berry said. “It’s naughty, it’s got
that sexual connotation to it, and
everyone here on the floor knows
that term.”
Most Washington University students are familiar with
floorcest—the act of hooking up
with or dating someone on one’s
floor. And while Berry might think
of his song when two residents of
the third floor of Eliot hook up, the
residents on Beaumont’s second
floor need only point to the graph
they have made to chart their intradorm relations.
“For the first four weeks, the
only identity of this floor at that
time was that we have a lot of
floorcest. I figured I could do
a chart about it,” freshman Bo
Zhang said.
When Zhang first drew up the
chart, he found nine floorcestuous
relationships, which grew to 12.
According to Zhang, each sticker
represented one act of floorcest. As
time went on, the chart branched
out to include “dormcest.”
When asked about why people
engage in floorcest, Zhang speculated it might be one way to break
the ice between new freshmen.
And while some upper-classmen might warn against hooking
up with another resident on one’s
floor, floorcest is bound to occur
in some dorms.
“At the beginning of the year,
girls on the floor said floorcest
was bad,” said freshman J.K. of
Beaumont, who wished to remain anonymous. “I just sort of
smirked, because I knew it was
going to happen.”
Why ‘floorcest’?
“It’s a combination of the fact
that I know them well enough and
that there’s a lot of alcohol involved
that kind of fuels the relationship,”
said Ben, a freshmen who declined
to give his full name.
For J.K.’s girlfriend and floormate A.K., friendship drew the
couple together.
“You get to know the people on
your floor the best, so it’s somewhat inevitable that it will happen
at some point,” said A.K. “But it’s
how you deal with it that makes
the difference.”
Fallout
But floorcest, rarely a safe substance to handle, poses dangers to
those involved and to those who
leave a floorcestuous relationship.
“After you hook up with someone, there always remains sexual
tension in some way or another,”
said Greg, a freshman who also
declined to give his full name.
“When you’re forced to be around
them, [the tension] hangs in the
air.”
Roommates can also be adversely affected by intra-floor relations.
“[Awkwardness]
happened
when I got sexiled, or when I felt
I couldn’t go into the room when I
wanted to,” said a male sophomore
in Shepley. “It meant that everyone
else on the floor knew what was
going on and who was involved.
A lot more people understood my
situation.”
Seniors Look Back
On the other hand, there are
couples that have endured beyond
their freshman floors, like seniors
Christine Wight and York Chen.
Wight and Chen, who as freshmen
lived in Lien Hall, became a couple by the end of their first semester and have been together since.
“We sometimes still reminisce
about how easy it was freshman
year,” Chen said. “We could just
walk 20 feet down the hall and see
each other.”
A fight during freshman year
demonstrated the potential danger
of an intra-floor relationship.
“It was weird because the next
day there were rumors we had
broken up even though we hadn’t
talked to each other since the
fight,” Wight said.
Seniors Courtney Caruso and
Alex da Silva also met as freshmen
living in Lien, and stayed together
after freshman year.
“It’s convenient, it’s fun, you
have the same friends, and if
things go wrong you just deal with
it maturely,” Caruso said. “It was
pretty nice to have my friends and
boyfriend in the same place.”
“It’s definitely a calculated
risk,” da Silva added. “From my
experience, no one’s been unable
to recover [from a breakup]. We’re
all best friends.”
‘make your own decision.’”
Junior Merigan Mulhern did
not tell her residents about intrafloor relationships, leaving them
to learn about the phenomenon
through their classmates.
“It matters more who you’re
with, not where you live,” Mulh-
ern said.
Though dating someone on
your floor can carry risks, Caruso
said there is reward in pursuing
romance.
“Go for it. I don’t think you
have a lot to lose,” she said. “You
never know what will come of it.”
Advice
Every student had his or her own
take on how to handle floorcest
and whether to engage in it.
“You really need to talk it
over,” freshman Chris Rinker said.
“We both talked about it before we
knew it was floorcest and decided
that if something were to happen,
we would still be friends. [The
relationship] ended but it ended
well.”
Not all freshman Residential
Advisors (RAs) told their residents
about floorcest.
“We told our residents ‘we encourage you to think of both sides
of the issue,’” said senior Hannah
Sharp, an RA for Danforth Hall.
“The advice we gave them was,
PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY MATT LEE | STUDENT LIFE
PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY MATT LEE | STUDENT LIFE
STUDENT LOVE | NEWS
X5
STUDENT LIFE
COUPLING from page 4
use their brains and the rest of
themselves.”
Senior Emma Cohen is writing her senior humanities thesis
on the discourse of sexual harassment and consensual relationship policies in universities,
and its implications for pedagogy. She argues that fear of
student-teacher relationships is
based on the incorrect assumption that students are powerless
in those situations. According
ot Cohen’s thesis, intimacy on
certain levels can be productive
in an academic relationship.
“While policies are rightly
concerned about preventing ex-
ploitation of students, they tend
to sort of shut down tendencies
for personal intimacy without
sex,” Cohen said.
Given how complicated it
could be to fall in love with a
professor, it’s not surprising that
most students keep their crushes within the realm of fantasy.
But is it possible to begin—and
keep—an actual relationship?
When asked if a student could
have a healthy relationship with
a teacher, Ake thought it could
happen.
“I would say the odds are
against you, but anything’s possible.”
Off-campus dating:
midway between the
40 and the real world
Q&A:
RON JEREMY
MCT CAMPUS
Pastor Craig Gross and veteran
adult film actor Ron Jeremy will
debate the functions of pornography in Graham Chapel this
evening, at 5:30 p.m. News editor Perry Stein spoke with Jeremy
about his views on the history of
porn, the sex economy and how
much longer he’ll stay in the porn
industry.
Student Life: What is the value of
porn in society?
Ron Jeremy: Porn has been around
longer than all of us. They found
naked pictures on cave walls with
cavemen. Many presidents had
drawings of adult nature. It’s been
around all over the word—the Orient, Roman civilization, Greek
civilization. Porno exists.
People have a voyeuristic interest in being turned on by naked
flesh, and I think it does actually
fit its purpose. I am not trying to
sound overly corny, because it can
be used of course for masturbatory
material, someone who is alone
and bored and wants to get a little
titillated, but it is also used for
marital aid.
SL: Marital aid?
RJ: No one is going to argue the
fact that after many, many years
of marriage it doesn’t get difficult
sometimes. So, if other things can
help out like maybe wardrobe, cute
little costume, role-playing, sex
toys, a little porn film, they are not
going to go off cheating on each
other if they do it together.
SL: Does this bring about unrealistic expectations in couples’ sex
lives?
RJ: No it doesn’t. They’re mature
adults. If your wife is in her 40s
or 50s—what, she has to look like
Angelina Jolie? Then she’ll look at
you and say ‘You should look like
Brad Pitt, you fat putz.’
SL: Your are debating Pastor
Craig Gross about porn today;
what’s your strategy going into the
debate?
RJ: We have a pretty strong debate. I like what he does for a living; I have no problem with his career, but he has got a big problem
with mine. So he has to go first,
always.
I don’t just defend porn blanketly. I want to see what it is he
has against the business, and he
often changes it. And then I’m going to try and slam-dunk all of his
points.
SL: What do you see as Pastor
Craig’s best argument against
porn?
RJ: He doesn’t have one.
(Laughs.) It’s a good debate. He
has good points, and I respect
what he does—but, I think I bash
his points.
SL: Do you think this is an issue
that a pastor should be debating?
RJ: Look, the church is having
enough of its own problems, like
people who say they are devout
members of the cloth and commit
these heinous crimes. So he has
enough problems with the church
than to worry about who watches
porn, which is consenting adults
who are watching consenting sex
being performed by consenting
adults.
SL: What do you think about the
$5 billion bailout the porn industry requested from the government
last month?
RJ: Larry Flynt and Joe Francis
of “Girls Gone Wild” were having fun and did it just to prove a
point. There’s not a prayer, not
one chance in a zillion, that would
have ever happened, in a million
billion trillion years.
SL: You’d think that during hard
times you’d want to be in the porn
industry. How’s the business doing
in this economy?
RJ: Hard times. Good choice of
words. (Laughs.)
It does suffer a little bit, mostly
because of the Internet, not necessarily because of the economy.
Because people get stuff for free
on the Internet, when they have
no money they are not going to go
going to rent a DVD. So it all ties
together and the business is down
[by] one-third. So the porn industry is in a little bit of trouble.
SL: According to a survey conducting last year by Student Life,
41 percent of undergraduates at
Washington University are still
virgins. Any advice?
RJ: That’s huge. Is there a very
large religious presence?
SL: No, not particularly.
RJ: That’s a bizarre statistic.
Forty-one percent is very high;
I didn’t think St. Louis was that
Puritan. You wouldn’t see those
kinds of answers in New York,
Chicago, Las Vegas or L.A. If you
have 41 percent you better believe
you have a very large religious following. Trust me.
SL: According to this same survey,
around 15 percent of men say they
don’t watch porn and 70 percent
of women say they don’t watch
porn. Does this follow the national
trend?
RJ: Your statistics are probably
way off. There is a lot of lying going on in your survey.
SL: Do you think views of sexuality have changed from your college
generation to this generation?
RJ: Yes. Extremely. I still have
textbooks, swear to God, that date
back to the ’60s that say a man having an orgasm is necessary, especially for procreation, and a woman does not have to climax, but it’s
nice if she does. The girls of today
look at that and say: “Horse----.”
And to prove my point, there is an
expression that did not exist in my
day, but it exists today: “boy toy.”
SL: What do you think of sexual
enhancement drugs like Viagra?
RJ: When a man gets to his 40s he
loses a lot of his libido, that’s a sad
fact. So Viagra is a wonderful gift
to monogamy. They’ll need the
boner for their significant other
who’s often the same age as he is.
SL: You’re 55 and still making
adult films. Do you take Viagra?
RJ: I don’t, but I do endorse the
pill. The fact is that I’ve never
seen a case where a guy in his 40s
[to his] 70s who can come close to
the powerful sex drive of women
his same age. These women can
just dunk the bejesus out of these
guys.
SL: So do older women have larger sex drives then men her same
age?
RJ: The way it really should be,
if it weren’t for society bringing
women down, it should be one
woman with many husbands, because she can satisfy them. They’ll
get one good nookie, one good
orgasm, let out gas, roll over and
sleep till Christmas.
SL: Reporters have asked you a lot
of personal questions. What’s one
thing you’ve never been asked?
RJ: They mentioned this as a credit at the end of the documentary
about me. They mention that my
mother was in the [Office of Strategic Services], which became the
CIA in the late ’40s, during World
War II. My mother was a spy. How
many people can actually brag that
their mothers were spies during
World War II?
SL: You’ve done a reality show,
this debate, mainstream movies,
stand-up comedy, adult films and
starred in a documentary. What’s
next for you?
RJ: More feature films. I got a
film on Showtime called OneEyed monster, a funny comedy.
I also got a film on HBO called
Homo Erectus—it’s a caveman
film with David Carradine and
Tom Arnold—it’s also going to
be in the stores under the name
“Stoned Age.” And then I have a
film that was at Sundance called
“Finding Bliss.”
SL: How much longer will you be
performing in adult films?
RJ: As long as the shmeckle
works. As long as the shmeckle
works I will exploit it.
Ben Sales
News Editor
During freshman year, a date
may have meant dinner at Center
Court, a walk around the Swamp
and a late night in the dorm room.
Two or three years later, however,
significant others may need to
make the drive from their apartments, meet on the Loop, go out to
Blueberry Hill and decide where
to sleep—in Skinker-DeBaliviere
or on Forsyth Blvd.
These are the realities of dating off campus, where the Washington University bubble is small
enough to keep most students dating within the campus community, yet large enough that romantic
partners may need a car in order
to meet up most nights.
Off-campus couples, however,
seem to enjoy that dating lifestyle, a far cry from their time on
the South 40, where entire social
circles lived within a five-minute
walking distance. Those couples
living off campus appreciate the
independence and options that
come with apartments outside of
the jurisdiction of the Office of
Residential Life.
Dating off campus, for these
couples, means increased privacy, a greater variety of places to
go and things to do and a feeling
of living in the “real world,” one
step removed from the isolation
of college life.
Senior Tyler Peck, who has
been dating his girlfriend for
more than two years, said that
he recognized the convenience
of life on the South 40, but that
living off campus makes partners
play a bigger role in each other’s
social lives.
“Off campus, you depend
a little more on each other for
friendship,” Peck said. “The mere
fact that you have to drive to each
other’s apartments makes a big
difference as to how you feel allocating time to one another. You
make more of a conscious effort
to hang out. It increases the criteria for what your relationship
means.”
One Brookings Drive #1039
#330 Danforth University Center
Saint Louis, MO 63130-4899
News: (314) 935-5995
Advertising: (314) 935-6713
Fax: (314) 935-5938
e-mail: [email protected]
www.studlife.com
Copyright 2009
Editor in Chief: Sam Guzik
Associate Editor: Indu Chandrasekhar
Managing Editors: David Song, Brian
Stitt, Trisha Wolf
Senior News Editor: Ben Sales
Senior Forum Editor: Jill Strominger
Senior Sports Editor: Joshua Goldman
Senior Scene Editor: Shayna Makaron
Senior Cadenza Editor: Cecilia Razak
Senior Photo Editor: Evan Wiskup
Senior Graphics Editor: Mike Hirshon
Online Editor: Scott Bressler
Design Chief: Dennis Sweeney
News Editors: Puneet Kollipara, Perry
Stein, John Scott
Assignment Editor: Sopie Adelman
Forum Editors: Tess Croner, Bill Hoffman, Aditya Sarvesh, Dennis Sweeney,
Tricia Wittig
Cadenza Editors: Steve Hardy,
Stephanie Spera
Scene Editors: Brooke Genkin, Lana
Goldsmith, Paula Lauris
Sports Editors: Scott Drattell, Alex
Dropkin
Photo Editors: Matt Lanter, Matt
Mitgang, Lily Schorr
Design Editors: Nicole Dankner, Brittany Meyer, Zoë Scharf,
Copy Chief: Brian Krigsher
Copy Editors: Elyse Kallen, Lauren
Nolte, Jake Sanches, Arielle Schreck,
Hannah Schwartz, Stephanie Spera,
Cristine Wei
Designers: Mia Feitel, Evan Freedman,
Susan Hall, Katrina Jongman-Sereno,
Laura Kornhauser, Courtney LeGates,
Ashley Nault, Joe Rigodanzo, Eric
Rosenbaum, Katie Sadow, Michael
Yang, Kim Yeh
Staff Manager: Willie Mendelson
Another senior who did not
want to reveal her name said
that though she lived across
the hall from her boyfriend
sophomore year, she enjoys
the privacy she now has living
off campus, where she sleeps
in a single room.
“You have more room; bigger room, bigger space,” she
General Manager: Andrew O’Dell
said. “We’re kind of like an
Advertising Manager: Sara Judd
old married couple that stays
home a lot. It’s nice cooking
Copyright 2009 Washington University Student
Media, Inc. (WUSMI). Student Life is the finantogether; it’s nice eating tocially and editorially independent, student-run
gether; it’s nice having our
newspaper serving the Washington University
community. First copy of each publication is free;
own TV so we can watch toall additional copies are 50 cents. Subscriptions
gether.”
may be purchased for $99.00 by calling
(314) 935-6713.
She also said she understands, however, the disadStudent Life is a publication of WUSMI and does
not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the
vantages of a relationship in
views of the Washington University administration, faculty or students. All Student Life articles,
which her boyfriend does not
photos and graphics are the property of WUSMI
live in the same building as
and may not be reproduced or published without
the express written consent of the General
she does.
Manager. Pictures and graphics printed in Student
“You have to plan to get
Life are available for purchase; e-mail editor@
studlife.com for more information. Student Life
together more,” she said.
reserves the right to edit all submissions for style,
grammar, length and accuracy. The intent of sub“When you’re both on the 40
missions will not be altered. Student Life reserves
you can pop over, especially
the right not to publish all submissions.
when they’re next door to
If you’d like to place an ad, please contact the
you.”
Advertising Department at (314) 935-6713.
As much as relationships
If you wish to report an error or request
may transform when coua clarification, e-mail [email protected].
ples move farther from the
Danforth Campus, a greater
change in dynamic occurs when ship.
“The beginning of this year
one of the partners graduates
from the University, even if he was definitely a new experience
stays in town. PJ Edelman, who and there were some challenges
graduated last year, has remained that came across our way, but
in St. Louis as an online journal- we’ve kind of gotten to this really
ist while his girlfriend completes nice comfortable way of compromising and being flexible with
her senior year.
Edelman said that although our time. It was probably a little
their schedules are different—he easier back then, but we’ve really
finishes work at 5:30 p.m., when grown comfortable in this role as
many college students have not well.”
Peck said he feels the same
started that day’s homework—he
and his partner have acclimated way. He noted that moving off
campus from the South 40 may
themselves to the situation.
“Our nights are spent very of- have been difficult, but that it is a
ten together and weekends I see shift that everyone must, at some
a lot of her,” Edelman said. “She point, experience.
“The off-campus dynamic
tries to do work during the day,
but that’s always tough for any moves [the relationship] to a
student. I could not do that when I more mature level of calling each
was a student. Sometimes I won’t other and setting apart times to be
see her until 10 or 11 p.m.”
together and going out places on
Edelman added that while it dates,” he said. “It almost preps
was easier during his senior year you for a real-world commitment.
to live the same lifestyle as his It makes the relationship much
girlfriend, he now sees more pref- more mature.”
erable aspects of their relation-
Not Your Average Professor:
Susan Stiritz and X-Magazine
Eliza Adelson
Staff Reporter
As a lecturer in Women, Gender and
Sexuality Studies and faculty advisor
of X-Magazine, Susan Stiritz gets into
our sex lives. Staff Reporter Eliza Adelson spent time with Stiritz to talk about
what makes college kids tick.
Student Life: How did you get involved
in your passion for sexuality studies?
Susan Stiritz: I had previously worked
on a family planning council and had
been involved in sexuality issues for a
long time. I saw how powerful it was
for [a woman] to take control of her
sexuality. When you take control of
your sexuality, you take control of you,
or the other way [around]; when you
allow someone to take your sexuality,
you let it dominate you in other ways.
SL: What about the Student Forum on
Sexuality?
SS: It’s a wonderful blend of people
from the art school and people from the
humanities, and I think it’s really great
that it joins those talents and people.
It’s been a lot of fun for me to interact
with students from the art school—you
don’t always get to do that.
SL: What is special about X Magazine?
SS: The sex magazines at other schools
are very different—very masculine and
androcentric. Ours is the opposite and
has more of a feminist framework. We
work to promote a more humane sexual culture on campus. In my classes,
80 percent say yes, in terms of having
experienced sexual coercion. That’s
terrible. Part of good sex education has
to do with communication skills built
into it instead of the bullying kind of
behavior that can happen.
SL: What is “hooking up?” What’s actually going on out there?
SS: Typically in the broader media, it
means if people are having intercourse
[with] tons and tons of partners—essentially fulfilling the definition of promiscuous. We found people did not have
many, many partners. Unfortunately,
because of the wider sexual culture,
they don’t know how to speak up for
one another. We just have this ashamed
culture on some level. We can’t talk
about it like open human beings.
SL: What’s changed on campus since
the founding of the Student Forum on
Sexuality?
SS: My intro courses are almost half
men now, and that’s really changed—
they’re so open. Some [students] are
like, “I’d like to think this way, but I
just can’t.” And they work through the
reasons why. When men find out what
it is that women need, they seem to be
the most anxious to give it to them.
People are hungry for this kind of opportunity to share among themselves in
MCT CAMPUS
The infamous, and phallic, Big Ben tower looms over London.
The British
are coming!
Becca Krock
Staff Reporter
PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY MATT LANTER | STUDENT LIFE
X Magazine works to promote a more humane sexual culture on campus from the perspective of a feminist framework.
a safe place, and that’s one thing about
our classrooms—they are safe.
SL: Ever felt awkward talking with students about sex?
SS: In the beginning, I was so awkward. Everyone is having trouble because they are trying to figure out what
is intimacy, everything from “Do I
like men? Do I like women? Do I like
both?” There are so many aspects to it.
We don’t get sometimes how hard it
can be.
SL: What’s your most striking classroom experience?
SS: In [one] class, I had eight guys
from the same fraternity. I really think
they were taking a course to ruin it, and
they flunked the midterm. They had
been saying there’s no such thing as
an oppressed woman. I showed them a
video, [and] in the middle of the video,
they said they were so ashamed of
themselves.
Guys are asked to give up their
privilege when they enter a women’s
studies classroom; it’s hard for them
to get their head around not being on
top. We know that men are disadvantaged by their sexism, and we just want
to help them—and we learn so much
from them.
SL: How different—really—are men
and women?
SS: I think we’re socialized to be different. I’d say that, today, we’re more
alike than different, but we follow these
dysfunctional scripts and sexually we
all want the same things. We don’t have
to keep acting like idiots.
British citizens are more
promiscuous than citizens of
any other industrialized Western
countries, a new survey found.
The US came in sixth, after the
UK, Germany, the Netherlands,
the Czech Republic and Australia.
The survey asked more than
14,000 people in 48 countries
about the number of one-night
stands, expected number of partners in the next five years and
attitude toward casual sex. The
responses were used to create
an index of “sociosexuality,”
used by evolutionary biologists
to describe how sexually open
people are.
The researchers who conducted the study attributed Britain’s first place rank to a growing acceptance of promiscuity
in women, and said that women
may even become more promiscuous than men.
When all countries were
taken into account, Finland was
the most promiscuous and Taiwan was dead last, with Britain
ranked 11th.
DISTANCE from page 4
But even with such plans, the
Iowa couple allowed each other to
maintain their own friendships and
other relationships. Pennington especially understood the frailty of a
long-distance relationship, having
had a roommate who had recently
broken up from one.
“We both went into the notion that it would fail,” Fellows
said. “We’re kind of on the same
page—that we can’t be too demanding of each other’s time, otherwise it’s not going work. It was
never a choice between having a
life in Ann Arbor and dating me in
St. Louis.”
Fellows and Pennington continue to visit each other every
three weeks. Though these visits
by plane take up a huge amount
of time for Fellows, he said he
was able to put aside frivolities to
compensate.
“It was extremely difficult at
first, but eventually I realized how
much time I waste on things all
throughout the week. I don’t need
to surf Wikipedia for two hours a
day. I can actually do work.”
Allen has also made sacrifices.
She arranged her class and work
schedule for this semester to accommodate visits from her boyfriend.
“You need the physical expression as much as you need the other
stuff, so if you don’t have it, the
relationship can get really unbalanced,” Allen said.
Putting a price on love
Although maintaining physical contact may well be crucial
to the survival of a long-distance
relationship, Fellows and Allen
discovered that flying to see each
other costs money.
For Allen, spending money on
transportation represents part of
the commitment that she and Trimble make to their relationship.
“Money’s a huge factor,” she
said. “But Aaron would get a second job if he needed to come see
me—it’s about being willing to
make the sacrifices.”
When Fellows and Pennington
purchased airline tickets for their
first visit during the school year,
they were relieved to find tickets
that cost $100.
“It was the only time that [we
could] actually put a price on
love,” Fellows said. “If that plane
ticket were $800, we both would
have said, ‘Oh my gosh, no, that’s
way too much money.’ But exactly
what number would we not have
been okay with?”
Online communication can also
pose problems in a relationship
like Fellows and Pennington’s.
Matt Nordman began dating Gwen
Leach, both seniors at the University, near the end of 2007. Both
knew that Leach would leave the
following spring to study abroad
in Uganda.
The couple exchanged long
letters by mail but were able to
exchange only five such letters
each during the four months when
Leach stayed in Uganda. Nordman and Leach also communicated
several times each week by e-mail.
Online conversation often proved
difficult because of Leach’s circumstances.
“Technology really let us down
more often than not,” Nordman
said of attempts at online video
conferencing. “Usually we’d end
up more frustrated than we had
been before the Skype date.”
MCT CAMPUS
The campus’s long distance relationships are often kept up by means of
laptop and plane rides.
Teng and Chu also “make a
strong effort” to talk every night
by phone or webcam, but were unable to visit each other during the
fall 2008 semester. Teng and Chu’s
parents, who wanted their children
to focus on academics, did not permit the couple to visit each other.
“It was hard knowing that—
we were sad, disappointed,” Teng
said.
This semester, after having had
several months to adjust to college
life, the two are trying to arrange
a first visit.
Long-distance life after
graduation
Although Nordman and Leach
will graduate this May, their relationship will return to its longdistance status, when Nordman
leaves St. Louis for Minneapolis
to work for General Mills. Leach
will spend two years with Teach
For America in St. Louis.
“We’re as prepared for it as we
can be,” Nordman said. “We’ve
definitely talked about, again,
how if anybody can do this, it’s
us. I think that with our variety
experience in long-distance relationships, we’ll be pretty well
prepared.”
Nordman wonders whether he
will be able to “jump into Minneapolis with both feet” after graduation. But as for the immediate future both Nordman, who described
work with General Mills as his
“dream job,” and his girlfriend
will remain physically separate.
“I’ll still have a big part of me
invested in St. Louis,” he said.
But at this point, I think it’s worth
it, because she’s very passionate
about what she’s doing.”
Fellows and Pennington also
face complications for life after
graduation: At the end of the summer of 2008, Fellows was offered
a full-time position with Google
headquarters in San Francisco.
Pennington has always
wanted to live in San Francisco.
“It’s really fantastic,” Fellows
said. “There’s always the tension
of ‘I’m going somewhere, so Jordan has to follow me.’ Which is by
no means true, but that’s the perception—that the girl follows the
guy to the detriment of her career
and her livelihood.”
However, Pennington will
graduate in the winter of 2009,
meaning the couple will face one
more semester of distance between them after Fellows’ graduation. The University of Michigan
junior was originally nervous that
Fellows’ graduating from college
could create a rift in their relationship.
“From her perspective, she was
really upset about it,” Fellows said.
As with the resolution of some of
their previous conflicts, Fellows
and Pennington were able to voice
their concerns and thoughts to
each other. “Things have been a
lot smoother since then.”
Like Nordman, Fellows will
start a career this summer and
will face some uncertainty in the
future. Pennington plans to live in
San Francisco for some time after her graduation, but also wants
to eventually apply to graduate
school.
“Then, I don’t know what’s
going to happen,” Fellows said.
“Obviously, it’s easier for me if
she goes into graduate school in
San Francisco.”
Fellows, who wants to continue working for Google, also
wants Pennington to pursue her
academic career, and may have
to choose between more time in
a long-distance relationship, or
relocating elsewhere with his girlfriend. The couple has agreed that
if Pennington will enter a program
in a city with a Google office, then
their relationship need not return
to its long-distance status.
“I think for now that’s the
furthest out we can think about
things,” Fellows said.
FORUM
Forum Editor / Jill Strominger / [email protected]
STUDENT LOVE | FORUM
X7
STAFF EDITORIAL
Why you
should be using
a vibrator
E
very woman should have
a vibrator in her bedside
drawer. Or under her
pillow if she’s the lazy
type. So many young women
(and probably old women for
that matter) don’t know how to
have an orgasm. Even confident,
sexually-comfortable women can
be inexperienced with their own
bodies. If you’re not sure whether
you’ve had an orgasm, then the
answer is probably “no.” All
women experience sexual pleasure
differently; it takes practice for
a woman to get to know her own
body. And it is harder for some
women to have orgasms than it is
for others. That’s where vibrators
come in. We’re obviously not done
breaking the taboos in our society
about female sexuality. Let’s all
be more open about discussing a
woman’s sexual needs. And if it
takes a Pocket Rocket or Rabbit to
make you happy, then more (battery) power to you.
Every so often you hear girls
talking about vibrators, but for the
most part it’s still pretty hushhush in our society. The idea of
women using sex toys carries a
slight stigma—in some circles it
is assumed that only women who
are “oversexed” own vibrators.
That stigma seriously needs to go.
Some women are lucky; they can
have orgasms with a few wiggles
of the finger. But for many others
it is much, much harder to climax.
A vibrator just might be the missing link between you and nirvana.
So what’s holding you back?
There is nothing shameful
about owning and using a vibrator
(even if you use it two or three
times a day). Having fantastic
orgasms is your inalienable right,
and if a vibrator is what it takes,
Godspeed.
Then there are all the misconceptions about what a vibrator is
and what it takes to get one. Vibrators come in all different types,
shapes and sizes. And no, not all
of them are g-spot (i.e. “dildo”)
styles. Many vibrators are simply
clitoral vibrators—relatively small
and unobtrusive and specifically
built for the clitoris. You can buy
a vibrator online with “discreet
shipping” (vibrator.com is a good
site to check out), or you can find
one in any sex shop (or Brookstone if you’re lucky—they call
them “pinpoint massagers” there).
Do your research and pick a style
and purchase method with which
you feel comfortable. If you don’t
feel like broadcasting your sexuality to the world, you can take
steps to protect your privacy. But
remember, millions of vibrators
are sold each year—there’s really
nothing shocking about placing an
order.
It’s tragic; there are so many
women in this world (some of
whom are reading this article)
who could be having orgasms but
aren’t. If you’re missing out, then
you don’t know what you’re missing. It also should be mentioned
that there’s more to vibrators than
flying solo. A vibrator can be great
for use with a partner as well. At
the very least, experiment. That’s
what being a college student is for.
So go get a vibrator, and discover
what all of the buzz is about.
If I kissed a girl,
would I like it?
Anna Sobotka
Staff Columnist
T
hanks to a hugely popular
song and a sexy video,
we all now know that yes,
Katy Perry kissed a girl,
and yes, she liked it (do you think her
boyfriend will mind it?). The song
has topped charts in the U.S., Ireland,
Canada and the United Kingdom,
sparking sexual curiosity everywhere,
including my own. I can’t help asking
myself: If I kissed a girl, would I like
it?
According to a study published
by Psychological Science in 2004,
called “A Sexual Difference in the
Specificity of Sexual Arousal,” there is
a good chance I would. Northwestern
University professor Michael Bailey
led a team of researchers to study the
differences between male and female
sexuality, and what they found was
quite extraordinary.
Before starting the study, Bailey
recognized that male sexual arousal
is category specific. This means that
heterosexual males are more turned
on by females than by males and vice
versa for homosexuals. Basically, men
who prefer women get turned on by
women. Female arousal, however,
had not received as much scientific
attention, and as Bailey posits in his
abstract, “There is reason to believe
that female sexual arousal is organized
differently.”
The group ran several studies that
looked at arousal patterns for heterosexual males and females, homosexual
males and females and post-operative
male-to-female transsexuals with
either male or female preferences.
The participants watched several films
showing different sexual activities,
each with different gender pairings
(male/male, male/female or female/
female), while simultaneously being
monitored by machines that measured
sexual arousal.
The results illustrated a clear
difference between male and female
arousal patterns. While males were
indeed category specific, both heterosexual and homosexual females
showed strong genital arousal to both
male and female sexual stimuli. This
means that if a woman prefers men,
she can still be turned on by women.
The transsexual group made the
results even more interesting. They
represented a group that biologically
had the brains of men, but the genitals
of females. By the end of the study, it
was clear that the transsexuals were
category-specific too; those who
preferred men showed stronger sexual
arousal to male stimuli and vice versa.
These results show that sexual arousal
patterns have more to do with how
our brains work than how our genitals
work.
The study concludes by saying that
if you are a guy who is consistently
turned on by other men, you would be
right to question your sexual identity.
On the other hand, if you are a girl
who is turned on by another girl,
there is no reason to assume you are
homosexual.
I guess, then, that Katy Perry got it
right. It may feel so wrong, or it may
feel so right. But, if you are a girl, it
definitely doesn’t mean that you are in
love tonight.
Anna is a senior in Arts & Sciences. She
can be reached by email at assobotk@
artsci.wustl.edu.
SNOW POWERS | STUDENT LIFE
‘Extreme’ly unjust
Caleb Posner
Staff Columnist
I
n the United States, when
the words “pornography”
and “jail” are used in the
same sentence, most people
assume that the imprisoned individual was trafficking in child
pornography. This assumption of
course is flawed, as our draconian
anti-obscenity laws have landed
many people in legal hot water of
late, most notably Paul Little (aka
Max Hardcore) and Loren Jay Adams. They represent the tiny class
of pornography producers and
distributors who have received
prison sentences for producing
material featuring consenting
adults engaging in atypical but
not illegal sexual activity. That
there are any such individuals
languishing in our prisons should
inspire immense outrage from
any liberty-loving individual. But
it seems that even our hard line
against legitimate erotic material is surpassed by the United
Kingdom. Though historically
they have created a number of
broad and oppressive censorship
laws like the Obscene Publications Act and the Video Recording Act, the multi-faceted 2008
Criminal Justice Act that went
into effect on Jan. 26 represents a
more significant blow against free
speech and pornography than any
previous effort.
Sections 62 through 67 of the
2008 Criminal Justice Act makes
it a punishable offense, for which
one may receive three years in
prison, to possess pornography
that meets the outlined definition
of extreme. Legally, pornography
is regarded as extreme if any
action depicted therein “[can]
threaten a person’s life, results or
is likely to result in serious injury
to a person’s anus, breasts or
genitals, involves sexual interference with a human corpse, or sex
with an animal (dead or alive).”
As such niche fetish material constitutes only a small percentage of
all available pornography, many
people are unconcerned, suggesting that most individuals will not
be impacted by this change in
law. It turns out, however, that as
many as 9.5 million UK residents
could be guilty of violating this
law, or so claims Backlash (the
chief group opposing this law).
Consider for a moment what that
means: 9.5 million adults could be
jailed for three years for owning
a single image or video clip of
material that is legal to perform
but is regarded as excessively
kinky by the sexually-repressed
members of government and law
enforcement who wrote and will
subsequently enforce this policy.
Even if you have zero regard
for the critical value in protecting
freedom of speech and freedom
of choice, and even if you see
nothing wrong with conducting
a witch hunt against people with
Internet service provider (ISP)
different sexual preferences, one
filtering would of course be inefneed to look no further than the
cost that this might have on Britfective, both because any filter list
ish society to see why this law is
is always incomplete and because
so flawed. As of 2004, the cost of
of technological loopholes such
incarceration was £38,000 (54,344 as dark nets or FTPS transfer. Nor
USD) per prisoner per year. So,
would it punish those who already
even if no new facilities were
had the material on their computer
built to house them (impossible
or other physical media.
as that would be, given the huge
Instead, they opted to pass
influx of new inmates), ignoring
a broad and oppressive law
the lost tax revenue and the conse- that potentially endangers the
quences of depleting the working
liberty of millions, hoping that
population, this law has the pobecause the average person is not
tential to cost £1,083,000,000,000
directly impacted by this policy,
(1,548,711,367,474 USD) if all
the public will remain silent. Dothose eligible are convicted and
ing so, though, would constitute
sentenced. Suffice to say the
a great mistake, for as Niemöller
prospect of spending more than a
famously remarked “...they came
trillion pounds to imprison otherfor me…And by that time there
wise law-abiding citizens for their
was no one left to speak up.” That
choice in pornography (created
is to say if we do not stand up
by and with consenting adults) is
for others when their rights are
absurd.
being trampled upon without due
Given the lunacy of this law,
cause, we cede ground to those
many people wonder why it was
who will later seek to deprive us
passed in the first place. Simply
of the liberties which we personput, certain sex-hating members
ally care about. So, regardless of
of Parliament want to stop the
what one may think of the sexual
flow of pornography, and as here
preferences of those under attack
in the U.S., realize that this is
by this law, we must all be vocal
best done by attacking the fringe
in our objection to it, and more
before going after mainstream ma- importantly, to the multitude of
terial. With strict censorship laws
less extreme but still alarming
on the books, such material was
anti-pornography and anti-sex poalready illegal to produce in the
sitions taken by our own national,
UK. But in the age of the Internet,
state and local governments.
there exists an ample online supply of such material courtesy of
Caleb is a sophomore in Arts & Sciences.
Brazil, Japan, the United States
and a great multitude of European He can be reached by e-mail at [email protected].
nations. Nationally-mandated
A review of sex(ual discourse)
I give a healthy
four and a half
stars
W
e came up with a lot of
ideas for sex columns
standing around in
St. Louis Bread Co. a
few Fridays ago. One of my friends
suggested I write about shaving preferences. One suggested that I write
about why guys like boobs so much.
We synthesized the two and came up
with the oft-noted relativity theory:
There’s no real reason, besides cultural
convention, that people like certain
levels of shavedness or that guys like
boobs. They just do.
We thought maybe a review of
sex would be good. I would give it
Dennis Sweeney
Forum Editor
3.5 stars. A lot of hype but doesn’t
totally live up to expectations. And
it’s true, someone said. Everyone gets
really excited, but it’s not really that
unbelievable.
The hypothesis was put forward
that shaving the genital area came
about contemporaneously with the
advent of widespread oral sex. It was
asserted that we should all call semen
“jimmies.” Plural or singular, we
asked. It depends on the usage.
The point here is that we all carry
on this discourse about sex that hints
at a lot of its realities and carries
them just to the verge of really being
exposed but at the last second displays
the kind of whimsicality that makes
you ask if any of it is really true or
applicable at all.
The absurdity of the discourse and
the fierce, though awkward, passion
of sex itself try to grapple with each
other, but they never quite connect.
You can’t verbalize the weirdness of
the physical acts you do, so you hum-
orize it, and you can’t rightly perform
the odd and vague version of sex that
words represent.
I continued this conversation with
a friend the Saturday just after our
Bread Co. hypothesizing. We figured
out that these conversations we always
have, whether they’re single sex or
coeducational, whether they’re solemn
or capricious, tend to end up equally
unfruitful. People come out the other
side thinking the clitoris is on the back
of the neck, or that the wenis is the
most sensitive part of the body or that
the other sex is actually just fooling
them and doesn’t in fact like sex at all.
My friend came to the hesitant
conclusion that perhaps it is just a
great mystery, an intangible thing—or
better, an untranslatable thing—that
See SWEENEY, page 9
YOUR VOICE: LETTERS AND GUEST COLUMNS
OUR VOICE: EDITORIAL BOARD
OUR WEB POLICY
Student Life welcomes letters to the editor and op-ed submissions from
readers.
Editorials are written by the Forum editors and reflect the consensus of
the editorial board.The editorial board operates independently of the
newsroom.
Once an article has been published on www.studlife.com,
our Web site, it will remain there permanently. We do not
remove articles from the site, nor do we remove authors’
names from articles already published on the Web, unless an
agreement was reached prior to July 1, 2005.
Editor in Chief: Sam Guzik
Associate Editor: Indu Chandrasekhar
Managing Editors: David Song, Brian
Stitt, Trisha Wolf
Senior Photo Editor: Evan Wiskup
Senior Sports Editor: Josh Goldman
Why do we do this? Because Google and other search engines cache our Web site on a regular basis. Our thought is
this: once an article has been published online, it’s too late to
take back. It is irrevocably part of the public sphere. As such,
removing an article from our site would serve no purpose.
Letters to the Editor
One Brookings Drive #1039
St. Louis, MO 63130-4899
News: (314) 935-5995
Fax: (314) 935-5938
e-mail: [email protected]
All submissions must include the writer’s name, class, address and phone
number for verification. Student Life reserves the right to edit all letters for
style, length, libel considerations and grammar. Letters should be no longer
than 350 words in length. Readers may also submit longer articles of up to
750 words as guest columns. Student Life reserves the right to print any
submission as a letter or guest column.
Senior Scene Editor: Shayna Makaron
Senior Cadenza Editor: Cecilia Razak
Senior Forum Editor: Jill Strominger
Forum Editors: Tess Croner, Bill Hoffman, Aditya Sarvesh, Dennis Sweeney,
Tricia Wittig
X8 STUDENT LOVE | FORUM
Forum Editor / Jill Strominger / [email protected]
Vampires and
the psychology
of attraction
Kelly Diabagate
Staff Columnist
I
GODIVA REISENBICHLER | STUDENT LIFE
Grandma was doing what?!
Tyler Peck
Op-Ed Submission
S
o, it’s not normal, I
know. Sure, everyone
goes to visit a relative or
someone they know in a
nursing home occasionally. It also
might have been that place your
high school service group chose,
so on Saturday afternoons you
would go play cards with three
old ladies who could school you
at pinochle. But working there?
Seeing what goes on behind
closed doors, after the lights are
out and all the visitors are gone?
You might think it strange to
work part-time at a nursing home
as a nursing assistant, but I really
found a community there. And
one thing I noticed quite quickly
was that college students do not
have a monopoly on sex.
Now, once you have cleared
your mind of the awful, scarring
images that one might associate
with old people having sex, you
should consider what you might
do in the nursing home setting. It
is not all that unlike a dorm: People of both sexes living in a hall,
eating and hanging out together.
As an employee, I got to observe
from an external perspective what
we must look like. And, yes, there
are stories to be told.
Granted, they are perhaps not
as graphic as when you walked
into your dorm room to find some
naked guy laying in your roommate’s bed. But nursing home
residents find happiness in much
the same way college students
do. For example, from the night
shift, I have countless memories
of walking into a room to change
someone’s ice water, only to find
them watching HBO or Cinemax
and experiencing the heights of
self-pleasure. Not only men, either. Women performed such acts
as frequently as men did.
Another forgotten part of nursing home life is the drama. Every
person knew what was happening
in the lives of everyone else. Does
that sound like a freshman floor
to anyone? Many times I would
be helping an elderly woman from
her recliner to her wheelchair
as she gave me the lowdown.
“Did you know that Mrs. X has
been spending a lot of time in
Mr. Y’s room? The two of them
together alone?!” I can assure you
that there were times when they
weren’t only reading the newspaper together.
I won’t share the wealth of
stories I have regarding nursing
home sex; many you would find it
traumatizing, similar to thinking
about your parents in the throes
of passion. And, I was probably
lucky to be a guy, since so many
of my female coworkers would
from time to time be horrified
to find that Mr. Z was “happy”
to see them as they helped him
out of bed. Although the thought
might not be particularly satisfying, it brought me real comfort to
know that those people still had
the spark that we have as college
students. Their sex drive didn’t
simply turn off when they turned
65. Just the hope of finding happiness at the end of life’s road is
enough to comfort anybody.
Tyler is a senior in Arts & Sciences. He
can be reached by email at tylerpeck@
artsci.wustl.edu.
SWEENEY from page 8
can never be expressed through words,
so that the only way to move forward
is through actual experience. Talking
about it will never do what it wants to
be able to do.
I, on the other hand, don’t want to
concede just yet. Sure, sex is not fully
translatable. Sure, we often detrimentally trivialize it or humorize it in our
discourse. But I feel somewhat strongly
(considering it’s a point I came to just
days ago) that there can be valuable
public conversation about sex.
Naturally, one-on-one, partner-topartner communication is going to be
foundational to any relationship. But
more than that, I feel that if we get
together in a room with a number of
people, pledge not to make vast, silly
generalizations and promise to exhibit
sincerity in our words, we can come to
understand both the universality and
the diversity of the sexual life.
I think it is good to take away some
of the mystery of sex. We have a lot to
work against: film, which tells us of the
sudden, uncommunicative, “romantic”
sex that everyone seems to have; selfreflexivity in personal sexual discourse,
which often piles up creative but silly
beliefs to the point that relevant action
is next to impossible; and especially the
sense of guilt many of us have learned
to associate with sexuality.
The point does seem to have been
made before. All the “Let’s talk about
sex” articles out there I’m sure number
with the stars. But what I want to
emphasize here is that this conclusion
and its corresponding implications can
be arrived at in an informal setting,
among friends, and it all can become
(suddenly!) fruitful. I asked, one day,
what I should write for my sex column.
I began to get answers, and conversations were started—and suddenly, there
was a healthy, serious discourse about
sex. I give it a healthy 4.5 stars.
Dennis is a junior in Arts & Sciences. He
can be reached by e-mail at djswee@
gmail.com.
Another factor is proximity.
In theory, the closer two people
are, the more likely they are to
become attracted to each other.
In actuality, it doesn’t always
work that way. There have been
many instances of people being
attracted to a person they have
never even talked to. Likewise,
people who are close to each
other don’t necessarily come to
like each other. In fact, sometimes it is the complete opposite.
The third factor is familiarity,
which can be interpreted in two
different ways. First, it can be
seen as the feeling of congeniality that arises from proximity.
The more time two people spend
together, the more familiar they
become. They begin to build
memories together; they begin
to have inside jokes. Familiarity
can also be looked at with the
perspective that we are attracted
to people who remind us of family members, loved ones or even
ourselves. In this way, we are all
a little narcissistic.
The final factor is similarity.
The more we have in common
with someone, the more likely
we are to become attracted to
them, which can also be either
true or false. Having things in
common with someone can bring
you closer, but there is also the
case of people being just too
similar to live together.
Beyond these four elements,
another that seems to play into
attraction is mystery. We are
attracted sometimes not to the
person most like us, but to the
person most unlike us. The idea
of the unknown entices and before we know it, we can’t think
about anything else but that
strange person who sticks out in
our crowd like a sore thumb.
That is why we just love
those vampires. They have the
physical attractiveness down,
and that, coupled with their
secretive ways and dangerous
airs, just makes them irresistible.
How can paltry humans compete? Add to this the Oedipus
and Electra complexes about attraction to older people, and then
look at Edward Cullen. He is
100 years old, and no human in
Bella’s life can make that claim.
Therefore, it’s actually not
so odd that we are all so in love
with vampire novels. It is just
human nature to be attracted to
strange, otherworldly hunks.
Sadly, they do not live in our
backyards, but only in books.
Nevertheless, through the written word, we will continue to
dream.
wish I could get into the
head of Bella Swan from
the Twilight series. I mean,
she has a bunch of relatively normal boys running after
her in school, yet she manages
to fall in love with one of the
few non-human ones. Yes, he is
beautiful, but at some point in
time, he also wants to kill her.
So, what is it about Edward Cullen that entices her and attracts
her to the point of forgoing her
own safety? What is it about
vampires that makes us wish
they lived in our backyard? Why
is it that we are so attracted
nowadays to supernatural, dangerous hunks?
Let us start by attacking
the cause of all our confusion:
attraction. Attraction is a pretty
powerful thing, even more powerful than love. For instance, it
is nearly impossible to have two
people be in love and yet not attracted to each other. Attraction
doesn’t have to be there when
two people first meet, but by the
time they become a “we,” it is
definitely there. However, there
are people who are attracted to
each other and yet not in love.
That’s when “friends with benefits” enters the picture.
Have you ever wondered
what makes you attracted to
someone? Sometimes we are
shallow, and it’s all about the
hair, the eyes, the smile, the
body. Other times, we look
deeper: It’s all about personality, maturity, etc. Our ideal lover
is most often a combination of
both physical appearance and
personality.
Yet, sometimes we find
ourselves attracted to people
who just don’t fit our idea of a
perfect lover. Bella didn’t intend
to fall in love with a vampire.
We may get really confused
about ourselves and realize that
the reasons we are attracted are
beyond comprehension. Human
beings are complex, and there
is no simple way to explain
why we are attracted to whom.
Nevertheless, we can glean some
type of explanation from the
psychology of attraction.
According to psychology,
attraction can be influenced by
four factors. The first is physical
appearance. I am sure this is
news for no one. The reason for
this, however, is rather interesting. Some psychologists argue
that this kind of attraction happens because beauty enhances
social status, and who wouldn’t Kelly is a freshman in Arts & Sciences.
want to be associated with
She can be reached by email at diabagpeople of high status?
[email protected].
Black coffee variety love
Jill Strominger
Senior Forum Editor
I
certainly went through a high
school phase where I read
those black poetry books with
the conversation hearts on
the front—the ones that are filled
with hatred toward men and love. I
remember quoting some of the more
cutting stanzas on my AIM profile
hoping for an ex-boyfriend’s shocked
reply. And I went through the college
phase where I thought love was a
clichéd, worn-out idea and hooking
up seemed edgier. But here I am, in a
world where we’re more likely than
ever to end up breaking our vows and
getting divorced, hoping to end some
cynicism about love.
Walk out on a limb with me—I
think our cultural problem with
commitment comes not from looser
divorce laws or a society more accepting of divorce, but from a
fundamental misconception about
what love is. Love reminds me of my
honors thesis a lot—it’s something
that you have to work at a bit week in
and week out. Sometimes it requires
passing on something that might be
momentarily more exciting, but it
gives you a deeper satisfaction on a
daily basis.
It’s not what you might read
in Cosmo or what you see in “The
Notebook.” It’s not that infatuated
feeling you have when you’ve just
recently discovered someone who
seems like the cure to all of your
desires. It’s not the months you spend
obsessively thinking about them and
imagining how wonderful it would
be to belong to them. It’s also not
analyzing a list of the character traits
that will make someone the best
provider, parent and social partner
and determining who best fulfills
those qualities, then dating them
and declaring your intentions to be
married.
Love is wanting to share your
morning coffee, finding someone
you can do laundry with and finding
someone with whom you want to discuss all of your mundane problems
and all of your philosophical inquiries. Love is making a commitment
to work through all the inevitable
problems that occur as a result of
being together over time even when
other solutions are easier.
But there is something quite
magical and special about the in-andout daily form that broken-in love
takes in the long run. It provides a
foundation that supports you as you
reach out to new experiences and
explore the world in different ways. It
offers you a steadfast confidence that
no matter what you try, and no matter
how badly you fail, you will always
have someone who will accept you
and your attempts.
How do you achieve this type
of relationship? The tried-and-true
advice will get you much further than
trying to mimic the ploys you saw on
last week’s “Gossip Girl.” Respect
yourself and don’t try to force
relationships with people who don’t
make you happy. Someone isn’t making you happy when they rarely call
you back. They aren’t making you
happy if you get in heart-wrenching
fights, feel you have to compromise
your values or find yourself thinking
that you don’t deserve them. You
aren’t happy if you’re constantly
jealous and afraid things will fall
apart if you don’t do x, y or z. Happiness is not swallowing tears rather
than working through them because
you’re clinging to a few special moments that make you keep believing.
Happiness is feeling healthy, vibrant
and full of life.
At most you get a few shots at
love. And you cannot cut your losses
and take it pass/fail. So keep your
standards high and maintain faith that
someone who can make you happy
on a daily basis for forever is out
there—there are enough people moving through our lives to find this one
person. And with all of the challenges
and struggles you will face throughout life, a consistent morning coffee
partner you love is an invaluable asset well worth the wait and hurdles.
Jill is a senior in Arts & Sciences. She can
be reached by email at jlistromi@artsci.
wustl.edu.
MCT CAMPUS
Cadenza Editor / Cecilia Razak / [email protected]
X9
Z
CADEN A
FEBRUARY | FEBRUARY 13, 2009
STUDENT LOVE | CADENZA
what to watch and see a five step program
Yeah, I’ve heard your case before. So you’re alone on Valentine’s Day—so what? There are plenty of people out there going through the same thing, and lucky
for all of you, there is a program for getting over your loneliness. All you have to do is open your eyes and ears to welcome in the arts and entertainment. If you
follow this simple schedule, I guarantee you will not end up in despair.*
*Not a guarantee
Percy Olsen
TV Editor
(
gain confidence
step
1
Being alone is not easy, so it’s best to start things off with an ego booster.
1. Listen to Flight of the Conchords’ “My Sugalumps.” Remember, it’s why all the ladies
are checking you out.
2. YouTube “Gunther and the Sunshine Girls,” the crowd Pleaser (and Teaser), and finally
learn what it means to “Sexualize the World.” Where do you start? With the four commandments: champagne, glamour, sex and respect!
3. Listen to The Beatles’ “She Loves You.” The song might not apply to you at the moment, but try to think of it as a premonition.
)
learn to ridicule
You don’t need a date or a relationship; you don’t need anybody, and you will prove that by laughing at those who are
doing worse than you.
4. Watch the sex scene from “Team America,” and convince yourself that sex just looks silly.
5. Watch “The 40-Year-Old Virgin.” Try not to think of it as a premonition.
step
3
step
2
shock & fear
If you’ve reached Step Three: Shock and Fear, you probably need more help than most. Step Three is this program’s most potent step. It urges
you to fear the sex.
6. Watch Derrick Comedy’s “Blow Job Girl.” Please don’t laugh. It’s not a joke.
7. Watch that horrifying sex scene in “Snakes on a Plane,” and revoke your membership to the “Mile High Club.”
desperation
If you’ve reached Step Four: Desperation, it’s time to get desperate. Break out the Weezer playlist.
8. Listen to “Tired of Sex” because what’s good for Cuomo is good for you.
9. Listen to “Love Explosion.” Hehehehehe.
10. Listen to “Falling for You.” Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no…
step
5
step
4
despair
I’m sorry. I’ve failed you.
11. Listen to Weezer’s “Best Friend.” “Just Friends” territory has never sounded so upbeat.
12. Listen to The Beatles’ “She Loves You.” The Beatles are ironic, cruel and overrated.
13. Listen to Flight of the Conchords’ “Not Crying.” Yeah, I’m not crying. It’s just been raining. On my face (sniffle).
what to watch
“America’s Next Top Model”
Tell her: “You could easily win this, you are much prettier than any of these girls.” She’s in.
A show about good-looking girls trying to get hotter. You’re in.
“Friends” episodes when Ross and Rachel get together
let’s just watch
Is there anything more romantic on TV than when these two get together? The episode when
they make up in the coffee shop and the episode when they have sex for the first time in the
planetarium are your best bets.
(
“Keeping up with the Kardashians”
Such a bad show, you both will do anything to stop watching it.
“The L Word”
The good news: Named one of the sexiest shows on TV, this program, filled
with lesbian lust, might just put you two in the mood. The bad news: She
might not be in the mood for you.
This is awkward: You have a
cute girl in your room, you’re
alone and neither of you is in the
mood. This doesn’t happen to you!
What is going on? What to do? Too
young for Viagra, too old not to
do anything. Don’t worry, here is
a short list of shows that will have
you both ready for action.
“Californication”
Although it seems like the ideal choice (it’s in the title!) this program shows
how sex can ruin lives. It’s definitely not what you want running through
your mind.
“Entourage”
So good, you won’t want to turn it off for any reason.
“Law and Order: Special Victims Unit”
Y’all will just feel violated the whole time.
“Man Versus Nature”
This show is gross. Like really, really gross. It won’t do either of you any good.
)
Zac Moskowitz
Cadenza Reporter
what not to watch
X10 STUDENT LOVE | CADENZA
Cadenza Editor / Cecilia Razak / [email protected]
sexiest
cartoon
characters
Hannah Schwartz and
Stephanie Spera
Cadenza Staff
From the phallic castle in “The Little Mermaid” to the topless woman in “The Rescuers” (which led to Disney’s recall
of 3.4 million copies of the movie), the link between cartoons and sex has been very subtle but undeniably real. We have
taken it upon ourselves to bring the conversation out into the open. Because we know you’ve fought over whether Prince
Eric or Aladdin was hotter and because we know you have a secret fetish for cats because of Cheetara, here is the definitive list—in no particular order—of the top 10 sexiest cartoon characters:
top 5 sexiest chicks
James Gunn’s
‘PG Porn’
Betty Boop: This 79-year-old takes the cake as the original 2-D sex symbol.
Jessica Rabbit from “Who Framed Roger Rabbit?”: “She’s not bad, she’s
just drawn that way.” Enough said.
Nora Long
Cadenza Reporter
Rosie from “The Jetsons”: Every man’s dream of the future: a submissive woman
who makes you lunch and can be shut down when she gets on your nerves. And that
metallic sheen doesn’t hurt, either.
Did you ever find yourself
watching a porn movie, and
think “Wow, this would be
high-quality entertainment if it
weren’t for all these boring sex
scenes?” Do you dream of a
world where parents can watch
porn with their kids without
having to explain where babies
come from? Well, fear not,
because James Gunn is here to
give us all the glories of the
porn movie—the transparent
double entendres, the strange
camera angles, the utter lack of
acting—while neatly avoiding
the actual moment of truth.
Now, granted, I am not really a connoisseur in the art of
pornography, but I think this
is a fantastic idea. Everyone
has the impulse to laugh at
the sheer absurdity of your
average porn movie, and here
is the chance to do so guiltand embarrassment-free. The
plan is to come out with a new
three-minute Webisode every
month—how many ways can
this man come up with to keep
the randy stars off of each oth-
Belle from “Beauty and the Beast”: Beauty, brains and not afraid of a little
rough play. The perfect role model for every five-year-old.
Meg from “Hercules”: This often-overlooked Disney princess looks like a Greek
goddess, sings like Belinda Carlisle and charms Hercules with her sarcastic wit.
top 5 sexiest dudes
Aladdin: Voiced by Steve from “Full House,” Aladdin is the only man who can pull off
parachute pants, a tiny vest (that shows off his killer pecs) and a fez whilst stealing you and
your heart on a journey upon a bewitched Oriental rug.
TOP TEN
Dimitri from “Anastasia”: This sexy Russian somehow removes all stigma from the
man-purse. Is that Anastasia’s music box in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
Trent from “Daria”: With his Dylan-esque voice, band member status and bad-boy
persona, even the aloof Daria wanted to jump his bones.
Skeeter Valentine from “Doug”: This blue-skinned, beat-boxing genius who taught
Doug how to dance has the most explicitly-sexual name in the history of children’s television. Oh, Skeet…er…Valentine.
Simba from “The Lion King”: Matthew Broderick’s voice set against the magical
melodies of Sir Elton John. This might be bestiality, but how could you not want to hit that?
Cici Coquillette
Cadenza Reporter
I consider myself a pretty attentive music fan. As an ardent student of double entendres and sexual undertones, there’s very little that gets past me lyrically. However, there
have been some that, by grace of their obscure references or popularity, are easy to miss.
Here’s a sampling of the top 10 songs I never realized were about sex (until now).
♥
♥
♥
♥
♥
ten
any Aqua song ever written
nine
“I’m So Excited”—The Pointer Sisters
eight
seven
six
er? Before turning to this world
of creative cock-blocking, St.
Louis’ own James Gunn wrote
such movies as “Slither” and
“Dawn of the Dead,” and this
background in horror shows
up in his premiere episode.
It’s a pretty typical setup on a
construction site with lots of
plays on the words “nail” and
“screw,” but the moral of the
story seems to be, never seduce
a man holding a nail gun (Nathan Fillion!), no matter how
rippling his muscles might be.
I can’t vouch for the dirty
versions of Charlie Brown,
because quite frankly, they disturb me. Charlie Brown should
be sacred. They also fail to
effectively avert the possibility of sex, which completely
defeats the purpose of PG porn.
But the other two Webisodes
constitute a milestone in the
progress of erotica. So this Valentine’s Day, grab that special
someone and watch a Catholic
school girl get her car fixed
by a sexy mechanic without
having to worry that they will
ruin the moment by getting it
on. The Web site is http://www.
spike.com/hub/pgporn. Have
fun.
In my own defense, I was eight years old during the height of my
Aqua fandom. Still, it’s incredible that they manage to fit so many
sexual references into each of their songs without anyone noticing.
Give some of the songs a listen—or better yet, check out the music
videos—and it all becomes clear.
In what is perhaps the most upbeat, feel-good song of all time, the Pointer Sisters insist, “I want to love you / feel you / wrap myself around you. / I want to
squeeze you / please you / I just can’t get enough / and if you move real slow /
I’ll let it go.” Quite the reason to get excited.
songs I never
realized were
about sex
“Turning Japanese”—The Vapors
♥
♥
♥
♥
♥
five
Ah, the Vapors. Without them, the soundtrack to “Beverly Hills Ninja” and the myriad ads that have used
“Turning Japanese” just wouldn’t be the same. The sexual component is a little less blatant: The song seems
to be about a distant love and xenophobia. It turns out that “Turning Japanese” is a euphemism for “the facial
contortions that a man makes when indulging himself.” (What would we do without you, UrbanDictionary?)
four
“White Houses”—Vanessa Carlton
This otherwise-adorable tale of growing up has a heavier meaning. Disguised by her reedy
tone in the bridge, Carlton confesses, “My first time / hard to explain / rush of blood / oh, and
a little bit of pain.” Pretty unambiguous, when you get down to it.
“Slide”—The Goo Goo Dolls
“Could you whisper in my ear / the things you want to feel / I’d give you anything / to feel it coming…I wanna wake up where you are.” Band front man
John Rzeznik has said that the song refers to a teenage girl who’s just become
pregnant, but it sounds like the opening lines are just the beginning.
This song was on the radio constantly this summer, and while everyone soon
knew the handclap in the main riff of the song, very few people picked up on
the lyrics. “Big hands, I know you’re the one / Body and beats / I stain my
sheets / I don’t even know why / My girlfriend, she’s at the end / She is starting to cry.” The riff and the sing-along refrain make this track a supremely
catchy ode to solo lovin’.
three
two
“Blister in the Sun”—The Violent Femmes
“Vindicated”—Dashboard Confessional
I admit that I’d begun to notice a pattern in Dashboard’s work after “Hands Down” and
“Screaming Infidelities,” but for some reason “Vindicated” passed right over my head. Most of
the song is pretty tame until the bridge: “So turn / up the corners of your lips / Part them and
feel my fingertips… / Defense is paper thin / Just one touch and I’ll be in… / So let me slip
away.”
“All My Life”—Foo Fighters
One of the best known Foo Fighters songs, “All My Life” is extremely up front about its lyrical
content. Whether it’s the chorus, in which Dave Grohl howls, “Yeah, don’t let it go to waste / I
love it but I hate the taste / When you’re keeping me down” or the verse where he sings, “Over
and over down on my knees / if I get any closer/ and if you open up wide / and if you let me
inside / on and on I’ve got nothing to hide,” the meaning is pretty clear.
“If U Seek Amy”—Britney Spears
While I’m still ashamed about how long it took me to understand the title—a good two days or so—I
stand by the fact that Britney Spears probably doesn’t get it either. (For those of you who haven’t heard,
say the title VERY SLOWLY, and think letters.) That lapse in perception aside, I maintain that I was
distracted by the sheer number of grammatical mishaps in the song (“All of the boys and all the girls are
begging to…if you seek Amy”).
“Semi-Charmed Life”—Third Eye Blind
one
“Oh no! Not that wistfully beautiful song of moving on from innocent beginnings!” I hear you cry. It turns out that the very same song that was played at
my high school graduation is, in fact, a tale of sex with prostitutes. Look to such
varied lines as, “She goes on and she goes down on me,” “How do I get back there
to / the place where I fell asleep inside you,” and “Those little red panties / they
passed the test / I slip them down your belly face down on the mattress.”
Scene Editor / Shayna Makaron / [email protected]
STUDENT LOVE | SCENE
SCENE
Robyn Husa
Scene Reporter
A small smile plays on his lips
as her exotic form prances into
the room.
“Bonjour, monsieur,” she
breathes, leaning forward in a
small curtsy, just enough for
him to see down her shirt before
straightening up once more.
She turns swiftly away and
flutters around the room, her
flimsy, short skirt ruffling up just
enough to catch his interest. As
she gets to the high shelves, she
pulls out her duster and stretches
out her arm, releasing a small
sigh of frustration when she can’t
reach the top of the cabinet.
“Here, let me help you with
that,” the man says, coming forward. He places his hands on the
grateful maid’s sides and slowly
lifts her up…
Popular among married
couples and kinky college students alike, sexual role-play is
an exciting way to spice up an
otherwise-dull sex life. While
role-play does not have to be as
stereotypical as the “the French
maid and the boss,” any form
of exploration between couples
is beneficial to both involved;
the advantage of role-playing is
that it strips away the inhibitions
one holds in everyday life and in
regular sexual play, leaving one
free to delve into an unexplored
territory of pleasure.
However, as exciting as the
thought of role-playing is, it is
not wise to show up randomly
at your boyfriend or girlfriend’s
house in a Tarzan loincloth and
expect him or her to immediately
play along. In order to introduce
such an experience, one must
discuss the idea first and prepare
for the event properly.
First, characters must be
considered. Find out what you
and your partner’s fantasies are
and proceed accordingly. Since
each character reflects personal
desires, the individual doesn’t
even have to be human.
For instance, if the thought
of Little Red Riding Hood turns
you on, and she wouldn’t mind
seeing the animal in you come
out, get ready to do your best Big
Bad Wolf and try re-enacting your
own version of the classic story—
perhaps one in which Little Red
never makes it to her grandmother’s house. Just make sure to pick
a scenario that feels right. Acting
out a cliché that has no connection to either of you takes away
from the meaning of the game.
Once characters are established, the scene must be taken
into account. If a giant meteor
is about to crash into earth,
destroying all life as we know it,
and the only thing you want to
do is make love to that special
someone, the thought of doing it
in the back alleyway next to some
dumpsters may ruin the magic…
unless you’re into that kind of
thing. The more detail you add to
your fantasy, the more alive it can
become. So, don’t underestimate
the power of scenery.
And now for the fun part (or
one of them, anyway): costumes!
Fantasy role-play is the perfect
opportunity to embrace your
light-hearted side by dressing up.
From skimpy undergarments to a
bulky overcoat, costumes and potential props are key to embracing
your sexual role.
You don’t even have to spend
much money to obtain such accessories. Discount sales at Halloween stores are a great treasure
trove of (in)appropriate apparel.
There is guaranteed to be at least
one sexy nurse outfit or patrol
officer uniform available for purchase. Does your sexual fantasy
have a homier feel? No problem.
Rummaging through your closet
for a mix-match of hardly-worn
clothing items works just as well.
As long as you are true to your
character, the costume should
come naturally.
Now that you’re dressed up
and characterized, you’re ready
to go, right? Wrong. Sexual roleplay is very exposing and can
often be intimidating. Before you
proceed any further, ground rules
must be established between you
and your partner to ensure that
both of you feel safe. Some of the
basic rules can include, but are
not limited to:
No laughing at your partner
for something he says or does.
It’s his character, and anything
you do to cause insecurity on his
part will make the experience less
enjoyable for you both.
Saying no is okay. While
everyone is entitled to his or her
fantasies, if you are uncomfortable acting out a certain scenario,
you should be able to decline
that particular option (in a polite
way). This is especially true regarding the ever-sensitive “rape”
or forced sex scenarios.
Excited about role-playing,
but still unsure of where to start?
Never fear! Here is a short list of
four common role-play scenarios
to get you started:
One-Night Stand
If the thought of having one
night of passionate sex with a
semi-stranger excites you, then
this scenario is a perfect beginning. Perhaps you and your
significant other can travel to a
party (frat or otherwise) and plan
to “meet” during the course of the
night. What happens after that is
up to you.
involves the female in a tightfitting nurse costume, but, hey,
that doesn’t mean the guys can’t
get dressed up, too.
Teacher & Student
Witness the act of chemistry
up close and personal as this
“extra help session” turns from
harmless interaction to lustful
passion! Perhaps you could go
over a fun and interactive topic,
such as anatomy.
Masseuse/Masseur
Hot oil, anyone? You come
in for a massage, but you end up
getting so much more…This can
also be done with edible sauces, if
you want to get creative.
You can build off of or modify
any one of these scenarios however you like. Or, be original and
come up with one of your own
using the basic guidelines set out
at the beginning of this article.
Just remember, role-playing is all
about letting go and having fun!
Nurse & Patient
Pre-meds, this one may be
more up your alley. Usually, this
hotseams
So ladies, you’ve finally met the right guy, you’ve found the location and you’ve set the time.
It’s the night of your first date, but when you open your closet, you find you have nothing to
wear! This might happen to you on a daily basis, but tonight’s much more important. This is
a nice guy and you want to leave the right impression; your mother always told you that first
impressions matter the most. So what are you supposed to wear? Here’s a brief checklist for
putting together the most eye-catching outfit to wow your man.
X11
First date style guide
Ginika Agbim, Scene Fashion Columnist
Now guys, the date
is February 14 and
you’re taking her out to
dinner—downtown of
course, at 7 p.m. sharp.
You know that they say:
“the clothes make the
man.” But what exactly are you supposed
to wear to impress her,
sweep her off her feet
and make the evening
unforgettable?
Don’t forget your common sense at home
Check the weather, consider the location of your date and be informed of the various activities in
which you will partake. Obviously you wouldn’t wear stiletto heels to a picnic date in the park, and
you know better than to wear a strapless top on an “adventure date” such as horseback riding or
rock climbing, even if you think you look cute. Using common sense shows your date nothing more
than that you have a brain.
Always remember to dress the part
When deciding what to wear, consider the fact that some restaurants have dress codes. Sometimes
a sports coat or suit is required. If so, be sure to have those items cleaned a week in advance.
If there is no dress code, then play it safe with a collared shirt. Wearing a T-shirt on the first date
may seem too casual and she may not think you’re taking the date seriously.
Find pieces that flatter your shape and body type
Obviously you don’t want to wear anything that makes your body look worse, so dress to make yourself feel
happy. If your stomach area is a problem zone, try an empire waist top or dress. For those who don’t know, the
term empire waist refers to cinching under the bust that then flows away from the rest of your midsection. If
you’re worried about your shoulders and arms, try a cardigan or a long-sleeve top.
Look clean, smell clean
First of all, shower. And after you shower, lightly spray a nice cologne. Cologne or any scent enhancer is more effective
when sprayed on your actual body, as opposed to your clothes. Smelling good is one of the primary steps toward looking
good and feeling confident.
Keep comfort in mind
Just because your new Marc Jacobs pumps make your
legs look like they go on for days, that doesn’t mean
that you should try breaking them in on your date.
There’s no reason to wear anything you know you can’t
walk in. But if you insist, try stuffing them with cloth or gel insoles to give your feet more security.
Regardless of the type of restaurant in which you will dine, clean shoes
are a must. Some women first look at a man’s shoes when assessing
his personality and habits. Clean shoes show that you take pride in your
appearance and care about the date.
Lastly, boost your confidence by making sure you’re well groomed. If
it’s time for a haircut or a shave, make sure you get that taken care of.
While the idea of going to a spa may sound girly, you should by all means
do so if you’ve been noticing some extra hair between your eyebrows.
Remember: when you look good, you feel good.
Another thing to keep in mind is that a date is not a time to play dress up
or pretend you are someone you’re not (unless the location of your date
happens to be a theme party, of course). If you try too hard to be sexy, your
date will notice and you’ll come off as insecure. But don’t show up in sweat
pants either; under-dressing shows lack of concern and attention toward
your new partner.
The solution: dress in a way that shows off your personality. By doing so,
not only will you show that you care, but you will also be comfortable and
show confidence and security with yourself.
-Stay Stylish
(and have a chic Valentine’s Day date!)
PHOTOS BY MCT
X12 STUDENT LOVE | SCENE
Scene Editor / Shayna Makaron / [email protected]
7
great reasons
to have sex
(as if sex weren’t enough)
Scott Fabricant
Scene Reporter
Have you ever wondered what it’s
like to be flogged? Yeah, me neither.
But recently, I was having a conversation with a friend who is a bit kinky.
As it turns out, a few more of my
friends have admitted to their own
fantasies in the past couple of weeks.
Soon enough, it started to feel like too
much of a coincidence—I had to find
out what all the fuss was about.
I started with a simple Google
search. This approach was ill advised,
especially without the protection of
SafeSearch. I managed to discover
Fetlife.com (think Fetish Facebook),
and a quick look revealed perhaps a
thousand or more kinks out there. I
was forced to narrow my quest down,
so I resolved to learn all I could about
BDSM.
BDSM, for those not in the know,
is a layered acronym. B/D means
Bondage and Discipline. D/S means
Dominance and Submission. S/M
means Sadism and Masochism.
Clearly, I was going to need guidance
for all of those categories. Luckily,
Wash. U. has just the thing.
The Alternative Lifestyles Association (ALA) is, as one member
described, a group dedicated to
educating the Wash. U. and St. Louis
community on alternative sexual
practices, including BDSM, and helping students and staff explore their
sexual interests. It’s also perhaps one
of the most misunderstood clubs on
campus.
“We are not a sex club,” this
member emphasized. “Our meetings
are not orgies or play parties. They
are discussions or workshops or tutorials on how to properly do the things
we do and how to learn more about
things people are interested in.”
It was the ALA and their connections with the larger St. Louis BDSM
community that really started me on
my journey. They directed me to a
monthly BDSM get-together known
as a Munch. You might be expecting people in leather harnesses and
nipple clamps, but not tonight. It was
all plain clothes, plainer food and
surprisingly plain people.
Looking back, I realize my
stereotypical views were awful, but in
my defense, I’d never met anybody
into BDSM. Or maybe I had and just
didn’t know it. Save for a studded
collar or two as a hint, this gathering
could’ve easily passed for a family
reunion. And with no hesitation, they
took me in as one of the family. When
I revealed that I was writing a newspaper article, they were more than
happy to help. The people at my table
even invited me back to their private
dungeon for an interview.
At this point, I’m morally obligated to tell you, you should turn
down that invitation. The BDSM
community, as I learned, is built on
principles, notably that everything
must be safe, sane and consensual.
Going to a stranger’s private dungeon
is not safe. I was later told that I
should have found someone I trust
who could vouch for them, or at the
very least, called someone and told
them where I was going and when I
expected to return.
The dungeon belonged to a guy
named Bob, who lives with his wife/
slave Cat, as well as his submissive,
Mouse.
The master/slave dynamic is a
voluntary power exchange. Cat (the
“slave”) will do anything Bob (the
“master”) tells her and has given him
total control of everything in her life,
including finances, while Mouse (the
“sub”) has negotiated a more limited
power exchange.
“As far as I am concerned, whatever he says goes,” Cat said. “That
doesn’t mean that I don’t have my
own thoughts, my own opinions, my
Brook Genkin
Scene Online Editor
1. Chill out
Stressed? Try a 45-minute sack session to chill out. Before and
after orgasm, the body releases oxytocin, a hormone known to reduce stress and improve moods. Engaging in intercourse regularly
has even been proven to reduce mild anxiety and depression as
well as help insomniacs get rest. A surprising bonus: When more
relaxed, the body is better able to absorb nutrients from food.
2. Stay healthy during cold/flu season
Having sex a few times a week has been linked to a higher production of Immunoglobin A (IgA), an antibody that protects against
common viruses such as the cold or flu. The hormone DHEA is
also produced during orgasm and is used by the body to balance
the immune system and promote bone growth, tissue repair and
sharpened cognition.
own ideas…I have input, but the final
decision is his.”
However, not once did I see Bob
order either Cat or Mouse around,
nor were either of them sitting quietly
at his feet waiting for commands. I
wouldn’t have even guessed except
for the occasional “sir.”
Still, how one could give up total
control? Couldn’t they be forced to
do horrible things?
“I know his boundaries, and so
I know my boundaries are safe,”
Cat said. “I know he wouldn’t let
anything happen to me that would
actually physically or psychologically
harm me. I don’t have to have limits
because I know he does.”
While a voluntary loss of power
may be baffling to some, submissives want someone to take the reins;
one sub told me she’s uncomfortable
making her own decisions. Doms, on
the other hand, are more than willing
to take control given the chance.
BDSM is also more than just
kinky sex. In fact, most people I talked to were in committed long-term
DS-type relationships. In hindsight, it
shouldn’t be that surprising.
“What we do is, in a lot of
respects, dangerous. It’s a lot of trust,
a lot of communication. You have to
be able to talk to the other person and
have your needs and wants known,”
Cat said.
When asked how exactly getting
beaten can feel good, Cat responded
by explaining the concept of “subspace.”
“It’s just like flying, like being on
the best high ever,” she said. “The
beating is enjoyable even before
reaching this state, because that’s
how we’re wired, but ‘subspace’ is
the ultimate goal, because nothing is
better. After the first time I reached
it, I couldn’t find my butt with both
hands, literally.”
I was informed that Cat prefers
more ‘thud’ type hits, while Mouse
prefers ‘sting’ type whips.
After a while, I started to feel at
ease with these people and my surroundings. I stopped thinking about
the eight-foot x-shaped cross, the
man-sized birdcage, spanking bench,
drawers full of ‘pervertables’ from
Home Depot, various swords and
knives, edible paint and no fewer than
two dozen whips, floggers, canes and
paddles.
After almost four hours of chatting, laughing, sharing stories and
testing a few of their toys, it was time
to go. But something Bob said near
the end of the night stuck with me:
“We are no different than the
person next door,” Bob said. “We
still lead normal productive lives. We
are still members of the community
and society. We put our pants on one
leg at a time, even if they may be
leather.”
It was an inspirational lesson, for
sure. Specifically, it inspired me to
visit a leather bar.
JJ’s Clubhouse is a gay/leather
SCOTT FABRICANT | STUDENT LIFE
bar, the city’s only one as far as I
know. I had heard horror stories
before but had never dared set foot
inside…until now.
The front bar was dark, grungy
and mostly empty, but the back
room was much larger, consisting
of a respectable bar and dance floor,
bizarre wall decorations and many
more people.
Aside from a few cowboys in hats
and boots and a couple of fat guys
in leather harnesses, JJ’s appeared
the same as any other gay bar. It also
played the same annoying techno-pop
remixes. The only major difference is
the inclusion of a small leather shop
right next to the bar. If you ever have
the inclination to buy leather shirts,
vests, shorts, undies, hats, boots,
collars, harnesses, paddles, oversized
dildos and unrealistic cock rings (not
leather), you’re in the right place.
I wasn’t the only customer in the
store. I happened, very unexpectedly,
to be joined by Mr. Missouri Leather
2007, Scott Fausz, who had an interesting take on the fetish.
“Leather to me means being in
charge of owning your sexuality,
feeling a freedom to explore whatever
turns you on,” Fausz said. “It could
be in a realm of clothing, or it could
be any sort of kink or fetish. It can
be that you feel sexy in leather or
are turned on by seeing images of
another person in it, or it could just be
the sexuality that’s represented by a
person wearing it.”
The Mr. Missouri Leather competition is part beauty pageant, part
talent contest—“Pecs and Personality,” as Fausz put it. His winning
speech was about domestic violence
in gay relationships. Bit of a looker
too, boys.
After my foray into leather, I
was finally ready to take on the play
party—a monthly get-together hosted
by a local fetish group. Unlike the
Munch, fetish gear is encouraged,
toys and couture are sold and BDSM
play does happen, on stage.
As I walked toward the door, a
woman breezed out through it. A
frilly green skirt, purple stockings and
a black corset—the walking piñata
looked satisfied. An unassuming man
came up behind her. They struck up
a conversation with another woman,
and through shameless eavesdropping, I came to learn they were married. In fact, they’d met at this very
same event, eight years ago.
Another man came out of the dark
room. He was wearing a homemade
red latex vest, a latex trench coat and
latex trousers, the snazziest outfit I’ve
ever seen. I knew immediately who
he was; he was Latex, the man was
talked of so reverently at the Munch
and who personally constructed Bob’s
cage.
Several
tables were set up to sell everything
from leather clothes to candles to a
homemade device called the “finger
flogger,” which was demonstrated on
my hand for eager buyers. All around,
people browsed the items, chatted and
spanked each other. Few noticed the
savage beatings on stage.
One woman, almost naked, was
whipped with a stiff rod until red. She
was crying, clearly upset, but never
used her safe-word. Safe-words are
a way to stop play when something
really goes wrong. The party’s general word is ‘safeword,’ while ALA
encourages a Green-Yellow-Red
system.
When she was finally taken down,
she was immediately wrapped in a
blanket, caressed and cuddled. ‘Aftercare,’ they called it. She was rapidly
cycling between laughing and crying,
but mostly she was just exhausted.
I knew if I came to the BDSM
party and walked away with only my
hand flogged, I’d have failed in my
mission; I had to go through with the
real deal. We found a man named
Steve who was willing to beat me.
But before he agreed to anything, he
sat me down for a serious man-toman talk.
“You might be ready for someone
to hit you, but are you prepared for
unexpected emotional consequences?
You realize, a [S/M] scene is a very
intimate thing, like kissing. Asking
a stranger to flog you is like asking
them to kiss you. Would you do
that?”
He was right to warn me, but I
knew if nothing ventured, nothing
gained. I got up on stage, took off my
shirt, spread my legs and saddled up
to the giant x-shaped cross. We were
the only ones on stage; any remaining eyes turned to me. I turned my
head to face Steve’s lady friend and
grinned, and was rewarded with a
harsh blow to the back.
I was whipped, thudded, stung
and kneaded in rhythmic crescendo
by a variety of flogging devices. He
explained each toy and technique as
he used it, and I listened, half naked
and studious with the occasional
wince. At times, it felt like a strong
massage, at others it felt odd, novel
and almost pleasurable, but usually
it just felt like I was getting beaten.
Within five minutes, or possibly an
hour, it was over.
Afterwards, as I donned my shirt
and coat and walked down off the
stage, I felt a bit tingly and slightly
woozy. Endorphins! It was then that
I started to understand why someone
might enjoy this. For the right person,
this feeling could be downright
sexual.
The next day, I asked my friend in
the ALA why she enjoys getting hit.
“Why does hitting feel good?
That’s a silly question,” she said. “It’d
be like asking why a blow job feels
good. It just does.”
3. Pain, what pain?
The surge of oxytocin that reduces stress also signals a release
of endorphins and corticosteroids, creating analgesic effects that
relieve aches and pains and have even been proven to reduce the
frequency, duration and severity of migraine headaches.
4. Sex makes you
happy
Feeling down? Try having sex! Not only does it feel good physically, but it improves mental health as well. The physical engagement
along with an emotional one encourages the body to release endorphins and serotonin, both of which lead to feelings of pleasure
and happiness, thus reducing symptoms of depression.
5. Bye-bye, cancer
Humans, and all animals, really were by design made to copulate.
Not doing so creates an excess of female and male hormones
which have been shown to increase the risk of cancer. The good
news: Regular engagement in sexual activity promotes normal
cell-function and growth, reducing the risk of breast cancer in
women and prostate cancer in men.
6. Burn, baby, burn
(calories, that is)
Sex is definitely not a replacement for regular exercise, but it is a
great way to supplement a regular workout routine. The average person engaging in moderately-active sex for 30-45 minutes
burns 150-200 calories.
7. Look better naked
Much like a regular yoga practice, the different positions held during
sex can tone and strengthen muscles that you wouldn’t ordinarily
target in the gym.
Want to make your sack session more like a workout? Here are a
few tips:
While on the bottom, use abdomen muscles to sit up and kiss
your partner. While on top, use your biceps and triceps to create a
plank with your body, working abs and arms simultaneously.
More adventurous? Positions like the “lotus” stretch knees and
hips, releasing built up synovial fluid and increasing flexibility of
joints. Moves that involve putting legs in a V or toward the face
and positions like “ballerina” give a nice stretch to hamstrings. The
“arch” and “stand and carry” require some work but work several
muscle groups at one time, strengthening muscle groups that may
not be as effectively targeted in the gym.
Some less obvious benefits of sex include:
Better bladder control: Regular use of Kegel muscles (muscles
used in sex and to hold in urine) makes them stronger.
Stronger, healthier teeth: Semen contains zinc, calcium and
other minerals that hinder tooth decay.
Improved sense of smell: The body produces the hormone prolactin post-intercourse, which stimulates stem cells in the brain to
form new neurons in the olfactory region of the brain, thus enhancing our sense of smell.
Reduces the risk of heart disease: Patients who engage in
regular sexual intercourse have been shown to be half as likely as
others to develop heart disease.
: How scary can three little words be?
Hana Schuster
Scene Reporter
“I LOVE chocolate!” my
brother shouted on his third birthday, as our mother brought out
a decadent chocolate cake with
rainbow sprinkles. Overwhelmed
by his feelings for chocolate, he
stuck his face in the cake the second it was put in front of him.
At that age, it is easy to admit
our love for anything and anyone.
In fact, three-year-olds seem to
“love” just about everything:
Mom, Dad, the dog, the red Power Ranger, the teddy bear named
Freddy. As children, we are able
to be open and uninhibited; if we
have a thought or a feeling, we
shout it out loud until someone
acknowledges us. As college students, things aren’t quite the same
anymore.
We can no longer blurt out our
feelings to anyone and everyone.
We can no longer expect people
to cater to those feelings. And,
unfortunately, we can no longer
be carefree enough to say “I love
you” without a second thought.
In fact, the thought of admitting
such strong feelings tends to scare
people half to death.
Because it is so difficult for
people to say those words out
loud, they can resort to some
pretty pathetic methods. Even
I was too scared to tell my
boyfriend I love him—I was
convinced it would freak him out
(and it probably would have at the
time). Plus, it is my policy that
the guy should say it first. So, I
often confessed my love to him
in a foreign language instead. He
speaks German, so I would jokingly say to him, “Ich liebe dich”
(I love you). Problem solved; he
didn’t take my German seriously,
and I was still able to tell him
how I felt…kind of.
My ex-boyfriend told me he
loved me years before we ever
started dating. We were best
friends before anything got ro-
mantic, and we loved each other
platonically. After a phone call,
we would both say, “I love you.
Bye!” and it never felt strange—
we didn’t think twice about it.
It’s not that it was the kind of
“I love you” that middle school
girls say excitedly to anyone they
recognize (read: “OMG! I. Love.
You!!”); we genuinely cared
about each other.
But as soon as we were officially a couple, the “I love you’s”
stopped. He sent me roses almost
every month, took me to fancy
dinners, opened doors for me—he
was a true romantic. But the first
time he said “I love you” to me
romantically was in an e-mail. I
was disappointed; I wanted my
first “I love you” to be amazingly
romantic—one that would sweep
me off my feet. But I survived. At
least it wasn’t a text message.
The truth is, everyone is afraid
of saying “I love you” and not
hearing it said back. When you
love someone, the last thing you
want to do is push him/her away
by creating an uncomfortable
situation like that, so everyone
seems to be waiting for the other
person to say it first, which obviously never works.
If you are in a relationship
with someone and feel that
strongly, chances are he/she feels
the same way. Saying, “I love
you,” is NOT the same thing as
saying, “Will you marry me?”
or “Let’s move in together,” or
“I want to have your baby.” So
let’s not get carried away here.
There is no reason for us to be so
terrified.
The bottom line: If you feel
that way, you should say it. We
all need to relax a little and put
the text messages, e-mails and
foreign languages aside. Come up
with something different—a funny, creative way of saying it for
the first time that still shows that
you mean what you’re saying. If
you are relaxed and genuine, my
guess is your sweetheart won’t be
able to resist saying it back.
Photo Editor / Evan Wiskup / [email protected]
STUDENT LOVE | PHOTO
X13
The Little Dildo That Could
Lily Schorr
Photo Editor
The Sequel
1
The little dildo sat in the
common room all day
wondering what his special
surprise would be. “Oils,” he
thought. “No, too slippery.
Hmm. Maybe she bought me
some new textured sleeves.”
Once upon a time, there was a
little dildo who belonged to a girl
at Wash. U., and the two were
very happy together. One day
when the little dildo woke up, the
girl told him, “I’m going to bring
you a special surprise tonight!”
And that’s when things started to
change.
The little dildo tried to ignore him. The next test was one of
agility and the little dildo knew that if he focused he could win.
Whichever dildo could wiggle the farthest into the closet full of
shoes in 30 seconds would win. “One, two, three, go!” they
both shouted. The little dildo dove down and wriggled as fast
as he could between the shoes. It was dark and he couldn’t see
how far the big dildo had gotten but he thought he heard some
crashing behind him. When the time was up, the little dildo
surfaced from the darkness and sure enough he had left the big
dildo in the dust.
All tied up, they knew that the
last part was the most important:
the test of endurance. “Oh no!”
said the little dildo. “It sounds
like The Rock of Love Bus is on
TV in the common room.” They
walked in and sure enough,
a marathon had just started.
“We’ll watch it and whoever
cracks and has to turn it off first
loses.” “Nearabout looks like I’m
fixin’ to get revenge for The War
of Northern Aggression,” said
the big dildo. So they sat down
to watch.
2
7
3
Finally the girl walked into the suite with a big shopping bag. “I
brought you a friend!” she exclaimed, and pulled out a brand
new big dildo. “Well howdy,” said the new dildo in a strong
southern drawl. The little dildo was stunned. Was he not good
enough for her? The girl didn’t notice the little dildo’s worry. She
said, “I’ll leave you two to get to know each other,” and she
left for the estrogym. As soon as she left the big dildo turned
to the little dildo and said, “Jus’ so you know, there’s a new
sheriff in town now.” “No way!” retorted the little dildo, “she’ll
realize I was all she ever needed after she tries you.” His voice
wavered at the end and the big dildo grinned and said, “Well
you’re as nervous as a whore in church. Bring it on Yankee!”
4
6
That night the little dildo was
sexiled and spent the night on
the bathroom floor. By the time
morning broke, he had made up
his mind. “I’ll just have to prove
that I can hold my own against
him.” As soon as the girl left for
the day the little dildo challenged
the big dildo to a face-off. The
terms: Whoever lost had to
remove his batteries forever.
5
The first test was a test of strength. Each dildo put a marketing book on his head and
vibrated to see who could throw it the farthest. The little dildo went first: six inches.
“Beat that,” he scoffed. The big dildo took a few practice vibrations and then took his
turn: 8 inches. The big dildo started laughing. “You ain’t got no more chance than a
kerosene cat in hell with gasoline drawers on,” he said.
8
20 minutes later, both of the dildos were fighting
their every instinct not to run as far away from the
TV as possible. “It’s so painful,” groaned the big
dildo as it rolled on the floor. “I’m getting dumber
by the second,” cried the little dildo. “Why am I
putting myself through this?” The big dildo began
to beg, “just give up already so we can make this
end!” The two dildos stared at each other.
9
Finally, the little dildo offered an olive
branch. “Truce?” he offered. The big
dildo sighed. “I guess.” The big dildo
got up to turn off the TV, but as he
approached it he realized he couldn’t
reach. “Oh no!” he wailed in despair.
All hope seemed lost, but then the little
dildo had an idea. “If I stand on top of
you, I think we can reach it.” “I guess
it’s worth a try,” the big dildo said
skeptically. The little dildo hopped on
and sure enough, it worked.
10
“Yay!” said the little dildo, “I guess
us working together isn’t such a bad
thing after all.” “You’re right,” agreed
the big dildo. “I guess if we combine
our talents we can achieve greater
things than either of us could alone.”
“I love teamwork!” exclaimed the
little dildo. “Let’s be best friends!”
The two dildos hugged. Later that
night when their owner returned to
the dorm room, both dildos were
happily waiting in bed for her. “What
adventures I’ve had,” thought the little
dildo. And they all lived happily ever
after.
STUDENT LIFE | SEX ISSUE
♥
X14
MATT MITGANG AND EVAN WIISKUP | STUDENT LIFE

Student Life | Sex Issue

Transcription

Similar documents

THE AVENGERS! WOLVERINE, IRON MAN

Walkthrough: Publicaster`s New Free Templates

jnewUniversity

Sex, Secrets and Lies

Game Post Mortems

Fellows and Longtime Members Meet at ACC

Proplanner 2012 ProTime Estimation Presentation

Site Specific Plan Dildo Village February 2009

Mollie Makes

Molllie Makes

Trojan™ Sexual Health Report Card

The Device that Dared Not Legally Speak Its Name: