How to Order - Emet Outreach

TESTIMONIALS
(Mostly un-edited to keep the flavor of the comments)
1. From a Machon Shlomo Alumni at NYU Law School
Dear Kurt,
Mazel tov on your book release! It was sent around on the Machon Shlomo/Yaakov
alumni list serve and both my wife and I read it already! It is great, informative, and
funny. A true shkoyach! You should continue to be matzliach in inspiring Klal Yisrael.
2. Machon Yaakov Alumni
(NYU, Goldman Sachs, currently at a FFB Yeshiva in Jerusalem)
Hi Kurt,
I just saw your book wow! Thank you!
From the portion I've read so far, I can see you've answered the prayers of many ba'alei
teshuva who need guidance integrating when returning to communities in the US. You
provide real advice based on real Torah knowledge and experience.
Thank you!
All the best,
3. From One of the Most successful Kiruv Professionals in America
Great stuff!! Really needed!
Shkoach!
I'm not sure if I fit in with that term :)
GS
4. Alumni of Several BT Yeshiva’s
Kurt,
Thank you for writing this book about how to navigate the waters of an orthodox world
successfully. I am sure that your experience and insights will influence many more bnei
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torah to positively influence those around them.
5. FFB Kiruv Professional in US
Hi
I just started a local program in an attempt to give a day school education to women who
did not have the opportunity to go to a day school. It is a dream in the making and we are
hoping and praying for the funds to continue to build it. We are currently in our first
semester with 21 women enrolled (and 20 more on a waiting list)
I think your book would be invaluable for the women currently enrolled in the program.
6. Yet another FFB
Kurt,
We sat together at the Teaneck Yeshiva Dinner. I have to commend you for your work in
putting together "Fitting in"; I hope it brings you much continued mazel and bracha. I
literally just got it emailed to me and spent the last two hours with it until I finished. You
managed to piece together things which are so subjective in a manner that is clear,
sourced and reverent, without sounding petty or dogmatic.
My only wish is that it's republished without being specifically directed for baale teshuva,
so many "FFB"'s also need this book.
Again, the book is incredible and I daven that it should be widely used. Great work!
7. From one of the most prominent Rebbetzin’s in Brooklyn.
She is a well-known educator and her husband is a Rosh HaYeshiva, a Rov and a
prominent speaker.
Dear Mr. Stein,
My husband and I share this email address. I took the liberty of reading your book and
enjoyed it very much! It was honest, refreshing and had many beautiful insights.
8. From a BT living in America, married with young children.
Couldn't resist skimming a bit of your book at work. Great stuff! You hit on a many real
issues. I read the part explaining why it's practically hard to make close FFB friends. You
basically described us to the T, and it's helpful to understand the dynamics behind the
scenes that people don't necessarily mention to you. I'll share it around.
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9. From a Kiruv Professional in his 40’s living in America
Dear Kurt,
I started reading it and I did not stop till it got to the sections of halacha, minhag etc.
A BIG YASHER KOACH! It's a great work and you should be very proud. I believe
there are some VITAL AND SUPER RELEVANT points that you make that make
your pamphlet a MUST READ for starting BT"s.
10. From a Kiruv Professional for over 30 years with many married children.
Now that I have read 38 pages this book is such a Kiddush HaShem.
11. From a 50 something FFB involved in outreach in Brooklyn
Hi,
I spent the last half hour reading your wonderful book Fitting In. My main involvement is
with Stage II BT's and I am aware of some of the issues facing pre BT’s and stage I BT’s.
This book definitely addresses many of their issues.
I know others have written about it, but I like your style and I would love to recommend
your book to those who can benefit.
Once again thanks for a really well written piece!
12. From a 50ish mother whose children recently became Orthodox.
Dear Kurt,
Thank you for sending this. I am excited to share this with other PORK (Parents of
Religious Kids) people. You did such a wonderful job putting this together and it is so
helpful for PARENTS as well as for the kids. It can be scary to watch your kids become
religious and have no idea what they are thinking or doing. Especially if you have been
helicopter parenting for 18+ years! Your book explains a lot of things that parents don’t
understand and are afraid to ask. It certainly takes the unknown scariness out of the
equation. Maybe the next book can guide parents into the religious world that their kids
have chosen.
Much success!
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Fitting in
A Ba’al Teshuvah’s guide to the Orthodox world
Kurt Stein
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Copyright © 2015 by Kurt Stein.
All Rights Reserved.
First printing 2015
ISBN-13: 978-1519738875
Thank you for respecting the work of the author. You may feel free to use any part of
this book, as long as the author is given credit and informed
The cover art cannot be reproduced and/or reused in any way, except by the express
written permission of the author.
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Table of Contents
Foreword
What you can expect from this guidebook
Introduction: putting everything into perspective
SECTION 1: THE SUBTLETIES OF BEING A HOLY NATION
Chapter 1: The Unwritten Rules of the Unspoken Words
Chapter 1A: Modesty/Tznius – Holy, but Private
Chapter 1B: Evil Eye/Ayin Hara – It’s All About Sensitivity
Chapter 1C: The Power of Speech- ‘Bris Kerusa Le’sfasayim
Chapter 1D: Lashon Nekiya (Refined Speech)
Chapter 1E: PDA’s Public Displays of Affection
Chapter 2: Becoming a Person of Refined Actions
Chapter 3: Spirituality in Business and Interpersonal Relationships
SECTION 2: NUGGETS
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Chapter 4: Your perspective on what is important may change
Chapter 5: Why many Orthodox men don’t wear wedding rings
Chapter 6: Do I have to dress like a penguin?
Chapter 7: Orthodox people socialize differently than secular people.
Chapter 8: Treat your in-laws like your best client.
Chapter 9: Why it is easy to feel judged initially and why the feeling will
pass
Chapter 10: The key to happiness: Have lots of children!
Chapter 11: The importance of maintaining close relationships with your
non-religious relatives.
Chapter 12: Kurt’s “How to” guide on staying close with extended family
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Chapter 13: How to take advice.
Chapter 14: Just because your child became Orthodox, doesn’t mean they
don’t need you.
Chapter 15: How to find a Rabbi or mentor that works for you.
Chapter 16: Protect yourself
Chapter 16A: Dating and Marriage
Chapter 16B: Business and Money
Chapter 17: Making a Wedding (Chasuna)
Chapter 18: Why are Orthodox Jews so confident in their life choices?
Chapter 19: How much do you have to fit in? It depends on you.
SECTION 3: CUSTOMS
Chapter 20: Shabbos Customs
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Chapter 21: Holiday Customs
Chapter 22: Lifecycle Customs
SECTION 4: APPENDIXES
Appendix 1: Biographies of Contributing Writers
Appendix 2: A request for interesting BT stories and a disclaimer
Appendix 3: Please use this book in conjunction with your Local
Orthodox Rabbi
Appendix 4: Glossary
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
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About the Author
Kurt Stein is a Senior Vice President-Wealth Management at Merrill
Lynch. He produces a widely distributed weekly video blog, and is a
popular speaker who has lectured to a broad range of audiences
throughout North America and Israel.
Kurt is fortunate to have spent six years learning in Yeshiva Aish HaTorah
in Jerusalem. Along with his wife Melissa and their 6 children, Kurt
resides in Passaic, New Jersey.
Kurt can be contacted at: [email protected] or 917-533-6912
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How to Order
Printed books can be ordered from Createspace :
https://www.createspace.com/5923368
Or from Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/1519738870
Download a free digital copy on Smashwords:
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/591035