Legacy, Memory and Remembrance

parish
October - December 2013
Th
is
FRmagazin
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The Magazine of St Mary’s and All Saints’, Putney
Legacy, Memory and Remembrance:
The Autumn Issue
What if no one remembers you?
The point of rituals
Does who we are
transcend our memories?
The gospels:
selective memories?
Dealing with negative
memories: can we
rewrite the past?
Olympic legacy:
all it’s cracked up
to be?
Parental legacy: what are
we leaving behind?
Historical legacy:
what did the Roman
ever do for Putney
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St Mary’s Church Key Dates
Regular Services
Remember
October - December 2013
Sunday 10th November
10.30am Remembrance Sunday
Sunday 8th December
10.00am Toy Service
St Mary’s Church
Saturday 16th November
7.30pm Parish Ball
Sunday 22nd December
6.00pm Christmas Carols
Saturday 23rd November
10.00am Christmas Fair
Tuesday 24th December
4.00pm Crib Service
Sundays at 10.00am:
Main Family
Eucharist Service
with Sunday School groups for
children aged 3 to 13 years
Symbols of legacy surround us, be they
fluffy white lines chasing airplanes,
or the wake carved by boats on the
Thames. The leaves on the ground
make a comforting lush carpet, but
they too shall be swept off on a windy
day, and the seasons turn.
Tuesdays at 9.30am:
Jumping for Joy 2
What remains in our wake?
Friday 29th November
3.00pm Christmas Market
4.00pm Choir
6.00pm Christmas Lights turned on
All Saints’ Church Key Dates
Sunday 20th October
4.00pm allsaints@4 Pet Blessing
a service for children
Sunday 3rd November
5.00pm All Saints Day
a short All Age Service celebrating
our patronal festival, followed by
bonfire, fireworks & hotdogs.
Wednesday 6th November
8.00pm All Souls Eucharist
with choir
Sunday 10th November
10.30am Remembrance Sunday
Sunday 17th November
4.00pm allsaints@4
Candles & Carols
service for children
Sunday 8th December
10.30am St Nicholas-tide
Toy Service
we celebrate St Nicholas with the
Sunday 22nd December
7.00pm Carols by Candlelight
sung by the choir with readings &
carols, followed by mulled wine and
mince pies. This service is
unsuitable for young children
Tuesday 24th December
4.00pm Crib Service
Children present the Christmas
tableau with carols (this service is
suitable for young children)
11.30pm Midnight Mass
of the Nativity
Wednesday 25th December
10.30am Christmas Eucharist
sung by the choir with hymns
and children’s presentation
for Christmas
During the week following Christmas,
Thursday 26th December - Friday 3rd
January inclusive, there will be no
weekday services at All Saints’ Church
traditional enthronement of the
Child Bishop & we bring a new
gift for a child who would
otherwise not receive a present
this Christmas
The Church Mouse is here to help!
Do you sometimes forget about events taking place in the Parish (or maybe not
hear about them at all)?
Well, the Church Mouse is here to make sure you never miss an important service, concert or
picnic again! Simply sign up to our Parish email list (you can choose whether you want to hear
from one Church or both) and the Church mouse will drop you a line telling you all the things
we have going on that week.
To sign up to receive Church Mouse emails, please visit either stmarysputney.co.uk
or allsaintsputney.co.uk and click the link where you see the Church Mouse
(on the right).
Wednesdays at 12.30 - 12.55pm:
Lunchtime Eucharist
Sundays at 6.00pm:
Caritas
A Eucharistic service, the emphasis on
prayerfulness and quiet reflection
Sundays at 11.30am:
Jumping for Joy
& Emmaus
Dates advertised
All Saints’ Church
Monday to Friday at 9.15am:
Morning Prayer
Thursday at 10.00am:
Eucharist
Service suitable for children, followed
by playgroup & coffee.
Sundays at 8.30am:
Holy Communion:
according to the Book of Common
Prayer, 1662.
Sundays at 10.30am:
The Parish Eucharist,
Main Family Service
with Sunday School groups for
children aged 3 to 10 years, and
Crèche for under 3s.
Contents
What are we leaving behind? Beyond
bricks, a bank account and descendants
who may bear some of our physical traits,
what is our individual signature? Artists,
writers, architects, royals or politicians,
will “go on” thanks to history, literature,
museums or the occasional statue. Have
they existed any more strongly than the
rest of us?
Memory makes who we are, or so the
wisdom goes. Do we stop being when we
forget our past? Is there life after death
only when we are remembered?
Sophy Jubb considers the legacy of the
evangelists, appraising the objectivity
of their - occasionally - contradictory
narrative. Paul Donnelly looks at historical
legacy, addressing the question “what
did the Romans ever do for us” from
a Putneyite’s point of view! Alex Bird
discusses Parental Legacy, and Kirsty
Wilkinson exposes both sides of the debate
on the legacy of the Olympics.
We hope that these articles will not only
entertain, but also help us approach those
days when we question the point of our
endeavours, epic or small as they may be.
Editor’s welcome
4Remembrance
by Ailsa Newby
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In our Media Review, Dr. Ashleigh Helm
delves into “Still Alice” the account of a
woman’s desire to cling to her identity
after the onset of Alzheimer’s.
Bad memories stick
in the mind like splinters
in the brain
by Chris Eyden
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Do this in remembrance
of me
by Sophy Jubb
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Blessed Memory: how
objective are the Gospels?
by Sophy Jubb
In this issue we look at the various legacies
we can leave, or have left, behind. We look
at the role of memory in our life and we
look at remembrance.
In her article Remembrance, Ailsa Newby
questions the common wisdom that we
stop being when we, or others, forget
our lives. Chris Eyden looks at negative
memories, while Gilly Pawson looks at the
meaning of rituals in our lives today.
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Historical Legacy: Friends,
Romans and Putneyites…
by Paul Donnelly
Silvia Macchia
Editor
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Parental Legacy
by Alex Bird
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London 2012: The
Olympic Legacy
by Kirsty Wilkinson
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Parish & Community
12
Parish Action Update
11
Media Review
13
Whom to contact
14
Something for Everyone
15
Classifieds
Editorial Team
Editor: Silvia Macchia
Design: Lee Barnes, Chris Townsend
Features: Alex Bird, Paul Donnelly,
Belinda Eddington, Sophy Jubb,
Gilly Pawson, Kirsty Wilkinson.
Proofreader: Tamsin Barnes
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Remembrance: does living-on
mean being remembered by others?
People forget, but God does not
Lest we forget....
Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
Though she may forget,
I will not forget you!
See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
you are ever before me.
I used that reading from Isaiah 49 at the first funeral I ever took. It
was a funeral for a homeless man who had been taken into hospital
in such a poor state that he could remember nothing about who he
was, or where he lived. They eventually worked out his name but
were never able to find out more about him. No one visited him in
hospital; no one who should have remembered him did so. When
he died there was no one to organise his funeral, except the Local
Authority (who have a statutory duty in such circumstances). He
died alone and, but for the funeral director and me, he was buried
alone.
So it seemed right at his funeral to declare that, whatever the
failings of those who should have remembered him and, whatever
the physical failing of his own mind, he was held in the everlasting,
unfailing memory of God. People forget, but God does not. Our
remembrance is dependent not on our having friends and family
who do remember us when we are gone but on the eternal, faithful
and unchanging God.
Not only in our memories
Yet there is a current view that life after death means being held in
the memories of others. We live on, because we are remembered by
those who knew us. This is summed up in a piece that people often like
to have read at funerals, called ‘You can shed tears because she is gone
or you can smile because she has lived.’ It’s good in its encouragement
to strive to live positively after bereavement but it contains this line:
You can remember her only that she is gone,
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
I want to say that whilst it is good and right and loyal to cherish
the memory of those we have loved and is a part of what it is to
be human, the person does not only live on in our memories. For a
Christian the individual does not live on because we remember him,
but because he is held in the everlasting love of God through Christ.
cliff top between Pentire Point and The Rumps in North Cornwall,
overlooking the ocean and grieving the incredible carnage of the
first month of the war, did it seem to him inconceivable that people
would not daily remember those who had died? His poem is entitled
‘For the Fallen’ though sometimes known as ‘Lest We Forget’. It was
soon realised that there was a danger of not remembering, of the
careless lack of compassion and recollection of the death of so many
young.
If we are held in the remembrance of God - come what may and
whether or not people are loyal enough to remember us in this life
or in death - there is an objective and immutable element to our
identity that is beyond us. Our existence is remembered. All those
fallen in the wars of the last century are remembered by God even if
no one ever again observed Remembrance Day.
Is our own self-image tied up in our memory?
Am I only me because I can remember that I am me and can
remember my history? Or do I have an objective existence as me?
Christianity would say yes to that last question because I am held
in the remembrance of God. Research undertaken by Alzheimer’s
Research UK suggests that people fear dementia more than they fear
cancer. Cancer causes fear but dementia brings with it the fear that
the person ‘disappears’, overtaken by forgetfulness.
There is a story of a woman with dementia who had moved into a care
home. She endlessly wandered the corridors in distress repeating
the same word over and over again and was inconsolable. The staff
made efforts to understand what she was saying and realised the
word she endlessly repeated was ‘God’. One member of staff tried to
communicate with her about this and asked the woman in a flash of
inspiration whether she was worried that she’d forget God. That was
indeed the woman’s worry: she was forgetting so many things, but
she didn’t want to forget God, so endlessly repeated God’s name lest
she forget. Her anxieties were ended by this simple statement from
the nurse. ‘You know that even if you forget God, he will not forget
you. He has promised that.’
Lest we forget. In the season of Remembrance it is good to
remember. To remember those we have loved but see no longer, in
thankfulness for their lives. Good to remember in compassion those,
not personally known to us, who have lived and died sacrificially for
the sake of others. But if we forget them, or even forget ourselves,
God will remember and hold us in lasting remembrance.
And it is good that it is so because humans, when all is said and done,
are not so very great at remembrance. Not just the old man I buried
(and to my shame I cannot now remember his name) but all our
loved ones. We say on Remembrance Day each year:
They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning,
We will remember them.
But do we? Yes, on Remembrance Day, but not as the poet Laurence
Binyon imagined, daily at the going down of the sun and in the
morning. In September 1914, as he wrote sitting on a rock on a
“Bad memories stick in the mind
like splinters in the brain”
We all carry bad memories around with us. Memories of past mistakes that at worst sadden or at best embarrass
us. We remember wrongs done to us. Sins committed against us remain unforgiven. An unfaithful partner
betrays us. A parent is cruel to us. An employer lies to us. A doctor misses a vital clue to a serious illness. We can
carry memories and resentment for a life time.
Memories don’t necessarily go away. We have
to do something with bad memories if they
trouble us unduly. At some point we have to
face our past. In doing so, we might be tempted
to ‘rewrite history’ or interpret it in a way that
either ‘saves us pain’ or ‘saves us face’!
“When I look back on my life, it’s not that I don’t
want to see things exactly as they happened,
it’s just that I prefer to remember them in an
artistic way. And truthfully, the lie of it all
is much more honest because I invented it.”
Lady Gaga
So very often, healing bad memories involves
‘gritty honesty’ and ‘grown up forgiveness’. “I
forgive you” is hard to say, harder to do. When
I look at my world I think I see 21st century
human beings playing ‘The Blame Game’ a bit
too often. If something goes wrong it always
has to be someone’s fault. The hospital, the
government, the police, the parents, the social
worker, the husband, wife or partner. Blame.
Blame. Blame. I’m not certain this is always
helpful when we’re hoping to rid ourselves of
bad memories.
“Make sure you take the plank out of
your own eye before you take the speck
of dust out of your neighbours.” Jesus of Nazareth
Revd Ailsa Newby
Vicar of St Mary’s, Putney
email: [email protected]
OK, things go wrong because other people
make mistakes, are selfish and tell lies, but
things go wrong because I make mistakes and
I’m selfish, spiteful and tell lies too. Before
we blame others for the memories that have
hurt us, we should take a long hard look at
ourselves and ask what part did I play in the
‘gone wrongness’ of my life?
a shadow of doubt, that we are wholly and
totally forgiven and unconditionally loved by
God. In that love we can have the courage to
look at the past in order to find out what a new
future might hold.
We are still living life and we still have
a) responsibility and b) opportunity. Both can
work for our future wholeness. ‘Responsibility’
is needed to heal our own wounds after wrong
has been endured or tragedy has happened.
New life, after the death of sadness, anger,
remorse and pain. Resurrection indeed!
“It’s sort of like my past is an unfinished painting
and as the artist of that painting, I must fill in
all the ugly holes and make it beautiful again.”
Lady Gaga
“When I look back on my life, I see pain, mistakes
and heart ache. When I look in the mirror, I see
strength, learned lessons and pride in myself.”
Lady Gaga
We have ‘opportunity’ to use our experiences
to build who we are and who we will become
with our newly healed and reconciled selves, so
that we can be free.
Free for what? I think free to move on. We have
to forgive and reconcile what has happened in
our past before we can make a better future.
Being stuck in ‘The Blame Game’ with or
without cause, is to be held captive to what has
gone before.
If we allow bad memories to dominate us and
we fail to forgive ourselves and others, we can’t
move forward, we can’t let go and we deny
ourselves a better future.
We can take ‘radical responsibility for ourselves’
and as Christians we can do it knowing without
Revd Chris Eyden
Vicar of All Saints’, Putney
email: [email protected]
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“Do this in remembrance of me”
Blessed Memory: how
objective are the Gospels?
The image of Jesus
In the Gospels we are given a series of snippets
and stories from Jesus’ life. Jesus was a
historical figure, he existed, and the Gospels
are in many ways his biographies. But how
much of what we read in them is historically
accurate, and how much is distorted to suit the
biographers’ aims?
Oral tradition
When I was a child, birthdays were all
about having a party with a cake, blowing
out candles and often getting into trouble
at school for talking too much from the
excitement. It never occurred to me that
it was a celebration of my birth, or my life!
Only when my son had his first birthday did
I realise what we were really celebrating and
remembering. In the weeks leading up to his
first birthday, I remembered the previous
year, re-lived the experience, entering
into it from a different perspective. Since
then, on each of my children’s birthdays,
I have been in the habit of retelling them
the wondrous story of their birth. It has
become a tradition. I never fail to marvel at
the miracle; I hope they have a sense of that
too as I recall details, re-engage with the
feelings of that time and re-enter the story,
re-contextualising it in the now.
Every time I am changed once more by the
wonder and drama of becoming a mother
and I hope that they too are reminded of
what precious beings they are.
Remembering is not just a forgotten
memory being called back into your mind.
It is much more. It is about putting back
together, re-membering, the pieces and reexperiencing the happening in this present
moment of time.
At the Last Supper, when after taking,
blessing, breaking and sharing bread,
Jesus said to his disciples, “Do this in
remembrance of me”, I don’t think it was
said lightly. It was said in a way that would
change not only their lives and way of being,
but countless others over the ages.
In the Jewish tradition, the act of
remembering is a religious imperative.
Jews had an entire oral tradition that was
passed down through memory. Even when,
with the advent of writing things down, it
was no longer necessary to remember, the
Jewish people kept the oral tradition alive
in memory rather than on parchment or
papyrus.
Ritual, of course, helps us to re-engage with
collective memories. For example, the Seder
meal (Passover), which is the meal that
Jesus was celebrating in the upper room
at the Last Supper, is still celebrated today.
It is full of symbols that help those around
the table to remember, and deeply enter
into,what happened thousands of years ago
to their ancestors after they were set free
from slavery and led to freedom: the story
of the exodus from Egypt.
For example, the parsley dipped in salt
water reminds them of the salty tears of the
slaves, and the unleavened bread reminds
them not to puffed up with pride but remain
humble.
Jesus continued this tradition using the
same words, traditionally said at the
Passover, but changed them, instead taking
bread and saying “This is my body”, taking
wine “This is my blood”. So as we celebrate
the Eucharist, we are not simply calling to
mind the story, we are entering into the
collective memory going back thousands of
years and re-living it for ourselves, in the
context of who we are today. The present,
constantly being informed by the collective
memory.
The very act of re-membering, putting back
together whatever story it may be, whether
it be a happy or sad occasion, shapes anew
our perception, how we think about things
and ultimately how we might respond in
action today.
Gilly Pawson
Footnotes:
Karpas – parsley or similar dipped in salt
water, like the tears of the slaves
zeroa – shank bone of lamb, a reminder of the
tenth plague where the first-borns were killed,
the blood from the lamb was marked on the
door posts so the angel of death could “pass
over”: baytzah – a hard boiled egg, traditionally
the food of mourners; charoset - a brown,
paste like mixture like the mortar slaves used
to build for their masters; maror – bitter herbs
recalling the harshness of servitude; hazeret
– bitter vegetable, the bitterness of slavery;
matzoh - unleavened bread, like the bread
so hurriedly made that there was no time to
include the leaven, before the slaves escaped.
One of the most remarkable aspects of the
life, ministry, and influence of Jesus is that he
wrote nothing himself. As a carpenter from a
small village in Galilee, he may even have been
illiterate. All of the records we have of him are
second-hand, interpreted and remembered by
others, and until the Gospels were compiled
Christians were dependent upon oral tradition
for their knowledge of Jesus’ life and ministry.
Ancient teachers had a tendency to leave the
recording of their thoughts to their pupils;
they themselves were too busy teaching to
write. The Buddha, Confucius, the Prophet
Mohammed, Socrates, and Jesus all left no
written record of their thoughts. This, of
course, leaves the door open to hagiography,
debate and interpretation, all of which have
been rife in Christianity for millennia.
Hagiography or history?
Hagiography is ‘a biography which treats its
subject with undue reverence, or which is
designed to serve a political agenda’. Historical
biography seeks to provide an unbiased
account of events. This is very difficult when
one is only able to use secondary evidence,
as was the case for all the Gospel writers. The
letters of St Paul predate the Gospels, but were
themselves written by someone who never
knew the historical Jesus. St Paul, of course,
had his own agenda to pursue in his letters,
namely evangelism and encouragement of the
early church. The Gospel writers also had their
own agendas, and included or omitted stories
to suit their own ends.
St Luke and the Gentiles
St Luke’s Gospel was written for a Gentile
audience, as is evident from its opening
words which address ‘Theophilus’ its reader.
Theophilus is a Greek name, not Jewish, but
it has wider significance in that it means,
literally, ‘God-lover’, or ‘Believer’. So right
from the beginning St Luke makes it clear
that he believes that the Gospel message is
for all people, not just Jews. In the Acts of the
Apostles, which St Luke also wrote, he again
addresses Theophilus in the opening sentence.
Unfortunately for Jewish history, St Luke was
also keen to placate the Romans, who were the
occupying force in Israel, and therefore cast the
Jews as the villains of the Crucifixion.
not told what the result was. Did the moneychangers stop working in the Temple itself? Or
did nothing change? For the Gospel writers,
it didn’t matter. What mattered was Jesus’
message that we should love God more than
worldly goods, and follow Jesus as ‘the Way,
the Truth, and the Life’.
Read with our ears open
The Gospels were written by people who had
never met the historical Jesus. Instead, they
are based upon oral tradition, stories about
him, what he did and why he did it. Each
Gospel writer had his own agenda when he
wrote his biography of Jesus, and because of
that elements of hagiography crept in in places.
When we read the Gospels, or hear them read
aloud, we need to be aware that this is not
primary evidence. We can never be certain
what is accurate and what has been distorted
by the writer. In this life we can only see Jesus
through a glass darkly, not face to face.
A leader who does no wrong
The Jesus of the Gospels was undoubtedly a
rather uncomfortable character to be around:
he said what he thought; he challenged societal
norms; he pushed people out of their comfort
zones; and he made immense demands. Some
of the things he did read as though they were
done for dramatic purposes, without actually
intending to effect change. For example,
turning over the tables of the money-changers
in the Temple at Jerusalem, a story which is
told by St Mark and St Luke, was obviously
going to annoy the priests and Pharisees and
was unlikely to make them change their ways.
However, in the Gospels this event is described
as reasonable behaviour by the Son of God
who found his father’s house misused. We are
Sophy Jubb
has a PhD in Philosophy & Theology from
Durham University. She is especially
interested in the changing status of women
in the Church and in children’s perceptions
of the Divine. Sophy is a regular member of
the congregation at St Mary’s, where she also
arranges weddings and baptisms.
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Historical Legacy: Friends,
Romans and Putneyites…
The Romans were discerning when it
came to choosing places to live. So it’s no
surprise that they created a settlement
in Putney and stayed here for almost 400
years. A thriving agricultural community
grew around the fertile area that is now
Putney Hill. It was also an important
crossing point on the Fluvius Tamesis
(River Thames). The Romans made a big
impression on Putney and on the rest of
their new province of Britannia. Much of
it can still be seen today, even if we are
unaware of it.
Rome’s legacy is all around us. We can see
it in our architecture, engineering, law,
literature, mathematics, money, religion
and writing. Many modern British roads
follow the routes of Roman roads. Most
of the cities founded by the Romans such
as London, York and Lincoln are still cities
today. Most modern English vineyards are
on the sites originally used by the Romans
because they knew where the vines would
flourish.
The English and Welsh languages have
taken many words and phrases from Latin.
Phrases that have gone into common
usage include; ‘Amor vincit omnia’ (Love
conquers all) from the poet Horace. ‘Nil
desperandum’ (Never despair) also from
Horace. ‘Tempus fugit’ (Time flies) from
the poet Vergil and ‘Veni, vidi, vici’ (I came,
I saw, I conquered) spoken by Julius Caesar
when he had conquered Britain.
A town or city of Roman origin will
have ‘chester’, ‘caster’ or ‘cester’ in its
name. These words derive from the Latin
word ‘castra’ meaning camp. Colchester,
Lancaster, Leicester and Winchester are
just a few of the towns which show their
Roman origins.
Many theatres today still use the
‘proscenium stage’ found in ancient Roman
theatres and often use a Roman style
semi-circular auditorium. Roman style
Triumphal arches were popular in the 19th
century. This is evident at Marble Arch in
London or the Arc de Triomphe in Paris.
Since the 18th century, churches, banks
and many important places of business
have often been based on Roman temple
designs. Part of the Bank of England is
a copy of the Emperor Hadrian’s villa at
Tivoli in Italy. Many modern sports arenas
are modelled on the Roman amphitheatre
as the oval shape allows everyone to get
a good view. You can see this at Wembley
Stadium or the Oval Cricket Ground in
London.
One explanation for the term ‘Great
Britain’ is that the Romans called their
new conquest ‘Britannia Major’ to
distinguish it from Britannia in Gaul
(modern Brittany) as they noticed that the
people spoke a similar Celtic language. The
Anglo Saxons (The English of today) did
Parental Legacy
I can now see that I was completely green to the eternal enigma that is parenting.
not arrive in these islands until after the
Romans had left.
When Roman coins were found on an
ancient site in Britain some time ago,
someone on television commented that
it was amazing that the Romans had
coins just like ours today. This is looking
at history through the wrong end of the
telescope. The really amazing thing is that
we still use coins like the ancient Romans.
Jesus said to his questioner about whether
the Jews should pay tax to the Romans (a
tricky question, as both ‘yes’ and ‘no’ could
get Him into trouble), ‘Whose image is
on the coin?’ The answer, of course, was
Caesar’s. And it was there for a purpose.
To proclaim to the world just who was in
charge, in Judea and Britannia. Coins are
just one of the numerous rich legacies left
to us by those innovative invaders of 2000
years ago. When we look at the Romans’
heritage, it’s almost as though they have
never left.
Paul Donnelly
Churchwarden and member of St Mary’s
congregation for over 20 years. Paul
works in advertising and graphic design
Parental legacy is comprised of many layers,
for example, physical (I regularly curse my
father’s tree trunk legs) material (particularly
in the current economic climate financial
assistance and inherited wealth play an
increasing role for some individuals), skills
(like my parents, I have absolutely no musical
prowess whatsoever) and values. Some of
these layers you can do little to alter, whereas
others, such as values, lend themselves more
easily to tailoring.
My parents, now in their 60’s, regularly
enquire about what they did well as parents
and what they did not. This critique request
may appear a feature to be avoided; however,
acknowledging the impact of their influence
helps me adjust my own parenting skills
accordingly. Having been allowed by said
parents to sign off school sports (viewed as
less important than academic achievements),
I now find myself vehemently focusing on
sports from toddler rugby to swimming
lessons to avoid what I consider my parents’
mistake and ensure my sons benefit from
exercise and team sports.
examined campaign manifestos but I suspect
often we emulate our parents’ views simply
trusting the judgement of those who raised
us.
Dr Phil (what can I say, I am on maternity
leave) comments, ‘our parents have a
powerful hold on us throughout our lives.
You should embrace the good things you
inherited from your parents and leave the
negative influences behind’.
Despite these difficulties, to avoid falling into
the parent-trap espoused in Philip Larkin’s
verse (you know the one!) it is worth taking
time out to challenge our own views and then
parenting techniques. Maybe in this context
requesting critique isn’t so bad after all.
Many amazing people do rise above huge
parenting obstacles; take Dave Pelzer’s ‘I am
David’. For others this is easier said than
done. Dr. Phil’s statement fails to consider
that some behaviours’ arise from nature not
nurture (still a parental legacy). A further
difficulty comes when you are unable to
recognise subconsciously inherited traits and
views. Politics is a prime example. Statistics
suggest the majority of us mirror our parents’
politics; this may be the result of carefully
Parental legacy defines who we are; it shapes
who we want to be and who we want our
children to be. We shouldn’t assume that
a positive parental legacy follows in the
footsteps of that which has gone before.
Just as ancient history shows young Romans
moaning about the older generation so we
should brace ourselves for our children’s
healthy rebellion.
Alex Bird
10
11
9
London 2012:
The Olympic Legacy
Parish & Community
Helping Homestart Wandsworth,
22nd September 2013
Cards for Good Causes opens its
Christmas pop-up shop in Putney
Twelve people from All Saints’ and St Mary’s went to a house in east
Putney to help a lovely lady with her gardening. We all damaged our
legs and arms by cutting down brambles but we cured ourselves
with biscuits and sweets. In the end the improvement of the garden
was outstanding and we hope to go back to improve the garden
even more.
Cards for Good Causes – which
sells Christmas cards for more
than 24 national and local
charities – opens its latest popup shop on 1st November 2013
at St Mary’s Church, Putney.
Grace Martin
Volunteer Shop Manager,
Angela Holman said: “Not
only are Christmas cards an
important source of funding
for charities, they also help to raise awareness of their work. By
popping into the Putney shop, you can choose from a fantastic
array of charity cards and stock up on all your Christmas
essentials, such as wrapping paper and gift tags.
You’ll find us by following our distinctive
triangular red Santa sign in Putney High
Street.”
What a difference a year makes. PreLondon 2012 the British celebrated their
plucky losers and were quite content with
their silver and bronzes thank you very
much. Now its all about the win and first
place – ask the British Lions, the England
Cricket team, Andy Murray, Chris Froome,
Justin Rose, Christina Uhurugu and the
rowers – 2013 world champions Helen
Glover & Polly Swann.
As we waited beside the streets of Putney
to watch the cyclists pass through, the
atmosphere was one of fun and enjoyment
as the crowd cheered the support cars and
police on motorbikes through. As someone
pointed out “This time last year crowds were
rioting against the police – this year they are
“high fiving “ them”.
Beyond the euphoria, however, what is
the real legacy of London 2012? Some
concentrate on the positives, the increase
in the country’s self esteem and reflect on
what a fantastic and unique spectacle we
produced. On the other hand, it is little
wonder that the huge £9.3 billion cost
has prompted others to analyse just what
benefits exactly will the country reap post
London 2012.
Boris Johnson has frequently declared the
Games “on time and on budget”. On time
– yes, but the original budget in 2005 was
£2.4 billion, over the next seven years it
quadrupled to £9.3billion. If you had hired
a builder for an agreed sum and his budget
went up fourfold I doubt you would let him
proclaim that he was on budget and on time
– you would be more likely to take him to
court.
Residents of East London now have fabulous
facilities but at what cost to venues across
the country? The Don Valley stadium in
Sheffield – home to Jessica Ennis-Hill is due
to be demolished due to shortage of funds
and held their last event on September 15th.
Greg Rutherford and aforementioned Helen
Glover are still struggling for sponsors
so is the Olympic legacy waning already?
The 180,000 attendees at the Sainsbury’s
Anniversary Games at the Olympic park
would wholeheartedly disagree as they
roared on their heroes to further success
this summer.
One of the legacies was to “inspire a
generation”; clearly it is too early to
comment on that particular ambition and no
doubt we will be bombarded with statistics
and surveys on children participating in
sport in the years to come. Baroness Sue
Campbell, former Chair of UK Sport and
now of the Youth Sport Trust feels work still
needs to be done to maintain this aim and
commented “The challenge now is to not
Cards for Good Causes Limited (CFGC) pays
the participating charities (or their trading
subsidiaries) at least 70p in every pound
from their card sales, less the VAT payable
on the amount retained by CFGC. The retained amount covers
CFGC’s costs of running the temporary charity Christmas card
shops. In addition to these costs, the participants have to pay
for the production and distribution of their cards.
drop the baton, like the Government did by
cutting £162million of funding for school
sport before reinvesting £150m in a primary
school system that refuses to see physical
education as a pathway to achievement.”
There is plenty of tangible economic benefit
to applaud. The Games gave a huge boost
to Britain’s international standing. Take
the rankings of the International Congress
and Convention Association. Thanks to the
Games, London is up from 19th to sixth
place. That unquestionably translates into
serious business spending flowing into
Britain from overseas.
My opinion is that the paint is still a bit too
fresh on those gold postboxes for my liking
to really assess the legacy of London 2012
just yet. I prefer to revel in the memories of
the Queen as a Bond girl, Super Saturday,
Usain Bolt doing the Mobot, Boris on the
zip wire, our joy for Jess, Chad le Clos,
lining the streets of Putney to watch
the cyclists in both rain and shine, the
excitement of the velodrome and, best of all,
the sheer excitement of being in the crowd
and watching my children’s faces as we
roared Mo to victory. We will always be able
to say “We were there when the Olympics
came to town”.
Kirsty Wilkinson
Staffed by local volunteers, the Putney pop-up shop is part of
the Cards for Good Causes’ national network. It is open Friday
1st November to Wednesday 18th December from 10.00am to
5.00pm
Kick off the Christmas season at the Parish Christmas Fair
The Parish Christmas Fair returns to St. Mary’s Church from
10:30-1:30pm on Saturday, 23rd November.
With festive fun for the whole family, little ones will delight in
the games, toy tombola, crafts, face painting and more, while the
grown-ups warm up with a coffee or mulled wine and shop the
gift stalls or splash out on the ever-popular raffle! All proceeds
from this year’s Christmas Fair go to Spires, a Streathambased charity which helps the homeless and disadvantaged
throughout southwest London. Volunteers are needed to help
on the day; contact [email protected]. All are welcome…
come along and join the fun!
12
13
9
Parish Action Update
Spotlight on Christian Aid
Christian Aid is a Christian organisation that
insists the world can and must be swiftly changed
to one where everyone can live a full life, free from
poverty. It works globally for profound change that
eradicates the causes of poverty, striving to achieve
equality, dignity and freedom for all, regardless of faith or nationality. Christian Aid
argues that ‘There is more than enough food in the world for everyone, but one in eight
people will go to bed hungry tonight. This is a scandal.’ To find out more about Christian
Aid’s campaign to tackle extreme poverty please visit the Christian Aid website and read
its ‘Hungry for Justice’ Report - www.christianaid.org.uk
In Christian Aid week this year a group of young people led by Andy Bodley and some All
Saints’ dads organised car washing in the grounds of All Saints’ Church. The event was
very popular and gives us a model for future years which will help offset the decline in the
street collections.
We are still looking for a new representative for Christian Aid at St Mary’s to take over
from Ann and Pete Tuppen, if you would like to find out more, please speak to Ann or Pete.
Media Review
Still Alice
by Lisa Genoa
Review by Dr. Ashleigh Helm
“Coincidence is God’s
way of remaining
anonymous”
Albert Einstein.
The day Gilly asked
me to write a review
on the book ‘Still
Alice’ by Lisa Genova,
my inbox contained
an email launching Wandsworth Clinical
Commissioning Group (CCG) new dementia
strategy.
‘Still Alice’ is a beautiful and powerful read.
We are given a window into Alice’s brain,
through which we witness Alzheimer’s
disease reak havoc as her thoughts are cruelly
plundered. Heart-breakingly we observe her
withdrawal from family and work life. Brain
“sink-holes” appear randomly and gradually
steal Alice’s freedom; her freedom to run,
to teach, to parent, to write, to speak, but
ultimately can it steal Alice?
Homestart
Wandsworth
Sue Winter at Homestart recently
contacted Parish Action looking for
help: “We have two Putney families, one
of whom has a nightmarish scenario of
garden clearing and a possible garden in
Earlsfield where the mum is recovering
from breast cancer, has 3 year old triplets
and a 10 year old, and unsurprisingly,
little energy for sorting out the garden!
Is there any chance that Parish Action
can help?”
Lynda Hayllar has kindly agreed to
coordinate volunteers to respond to this
request. If you can help please let her
know ([email protected]).
In our Media Review, we review films, books, or
musical pieces that have left a mark. If you would
like to contribute, please contact the Editor.
At the age of 50, Alice is a successful academic,
a lecturer of neuroscience at Harvard. She is
living in the fast lane, at the height of her
career and she juggles her work, travelling the
world to speak at International Conferences,
living with her scientist husband and caring
for her 3 successful grown-up children.
Following a series of memory lapses and
disorientation she is shocked to be told she
has early onset Alzheimer’s disease. Fiercely
independent, Alice struggles to maintain her
lifestyle and courageously battles against her
mind’s deletions to fight for her place as a
wife, academic, mother and friend.
“When will I no longer be me? Is my identity
something that transcends neurons,
proteins and defective molecules of DNA?
Is my soul and spirit immune to the ravages
of Alzheimer’s? I believe it is.” As her
frustrations and fears build she seeks to
empower herself and others by setting up an
early onset dementia support group. Rather
than decaying she seeks to learn to live better.
In my work as a GP I have seen what life is
like for a person caring for someone with
Alzheimer’s. No doubt some have you have
watched loved ones gradually loose their
ability to perform simple tasks and interact
with those around them. Scientists can tell us
in minute detail about the brain degeneration
and gene mutations that are accountable for
peoples’ cognitive decline. It is a rare however
to witness first-hand what it is really like to
have Alzheimer’s disease.
Early-onset Alzheimer’s disease is the term
when diagnosis is made before the age of 65
years. It accounts for 5-10% of all cases.
Wandsworth CCG has set increasing the
rate of Alzheimer’s diagnosis as a healthcare
priority. As of March 2013 only 49% of those
with the disease in Wandsworth have been
diagnosed formally, and a target of 55% has
been set. In September a Memory Assessment
Service is to be launched, alongside this a
carer and information programme has been
commissioned.
Whom to contact
Clergy
Office
Office
Revd Ailsa Newby, Team Rector,
St Mary’s Church
3 Wharf Terrace, SW15 2JZ
Tel: 07527 451 035
Email: [email protected]
St Mary’s Church
Uzma Osinibi, Parish Administrator
St Mary’s Church, Putney High Street
SW15 1SN
Tel: 0208 394 6061
Office Open Monday - Friday 9.00am-1.00pm
Weddings and Baptisms for St Mary’s
Mrs Sophy Jubb
Tel: 020 8394 6067
Email: [email protected]
Revd Chris Eyden, Team Vicar,
All Saints’ Church
The Vicarage, 115 Felsham Road, SW15 1BA
From 12 Nov: 21 Landford Road, SW15 1AQ
Tel: 07951 600 924
Email: [email protected]
Assistant Priest
Rev’d Gilly Pawson
(Sundays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays ONLY)
Tel: 07956 937 989
E-mail: [email protected]
Pastoral Assistant
David Adamson
St Mary’s Church, Putney High Street
Tel: 07841 908 382
Email: [email protected]
Wardens
Mr Gerald Allison, Parish Warden
Tel: 020 8789 8487
26 Landford Road, SW15 1AG
Mr Paul Donnelly, Parish Warden
Tel: 07810 647 192
Email: [email protected]
Ms Hayley Argles-Grant, St Mary’s
Tel: 07941 461 930
Email: [email protected]
Martin Watts, St Mary’s
Tel: 0208 788 3515
Email: [email protected]
Angela Attah, St Mary’s Deputy Warden
Tel: 0208 780 5857
Email: [email protected]
Mr Iain Cox, All Saints’
Tel: 020 8789 8690
14 Lower Common South, SW15 1BP
Clemancy Gordon-Martin, All Saints’
Tel: 07974729180
Email: [email protected]
The NHS approves self-testing as a quick,
accurate and valid screening test for the
detection of Alzheimer’s disease (93% diagnostic
accuracy). One such test, available on-line, is
Test Your Memory (www.tymtest.com).
Putney Debates
1647 Exhibition
2,093 people currently live in Wandsworth
with diagnosed dementia, of which 66 have
early-onset disease.
Telephone 020 8788 4414 for opening
times. Message updated each week.
Still Alice, still John, still Sue, still…our
neighbours, friends and community. Still
ours – a chance to act?
Located at St Mary’s Church.
Also see website relating to our
permanent HLF funded exhibition:
www.putneydebates.com
A DVD is also available.
Bookings for St Mary’s
Mr Robert Dickinson (Verger & Bookings)
Tel: 020 8394 6063
Email: [email protected]
All Saints’ Church
Carolyn Biddick, Administrator
Bookings, weddings, & baptisms
Tel: 020 3185 2013
Email: [email protected]
Funerals for both churches
Please contact Parish Administrator
People
Readers
Mr Richard Holman
Tel: 020 8789 0953
11 Genoa Avenue SW15 6DY
Mrs Caroline Donne
Contact through Parish Office
Dr Ursula Hodges
Contact through Parish Office
Dr Richard Ghail,
Contact through Parish Office
Mr Ian Yearsley, Emeritus Reader
New Details: 170 Huntingfield Road
London SW15 5ES
Tel: 020 8487 8476
Music Directors
All Saints’ Church
Peter Foggitt
Tel: 07894 991 685
Email: [email protected]
St Mary’s Church
Mr Travis Baker
Email: [email protected]
Sacristans
St Mary’s Church
Sophy & Martin Jubb
Contact through Parish Office
All Saints’ Church
Mrs Carolyn Biddick
Hon. Treasurer to PCC
Mr Richard Holman
Contact through Parish Office
Stewardship and Giving
Mr Richard Holman
Tel: 020 8789 0953
11 Genoa Avenue, SW15 6DY
Bell Ringers
Ms Sarah Tuppen, Tower Captain
Contact through Parish Office
Tel: 020 8788 4414
Miss Cherry Steward, Secretary,
Tel: 020 8876 5352
Parish Safeguarding Officers
St Mary’s Church
Hilary Newth
Tel: 07973 316 667
Email: [email protected]
Isobel Vass
Tel: 0208 789 1238
Email: [email protected]
All Saints’ Church
Victoria Prince
Tel: 07582 034 909
Email: [email protected]
Marigold Hayes
Tel: 020 3185 2013
Email: [email protected]
Parish Magazine
Editor:
Mrs Silvia Macchia Riley
Tel: 020 8789 0590
Email: [email protected]
Please send any post to Parish Office
Design:
Chris Townsend
TA2
Tel: 020 8540 4030
Mob: 07973 506 034
Web: http://www.ta2.co.uk
Email: [email protected]
Lee Barnes
Equate
Tel: 08445 678 990
Web: http://www.equate.uk.com
Email: [email protected]
Advertising Sales:
Mrs. Sophie Holdcroft
Email: [email protected]
Classifieds:
Julia Hebblethwaite
020 87852198
14
15
9
Something for Everyone
Sunday School
Both churches run Sunday Schools catering for
children from pre-school up to Year 8. They are
run by volunteers on a rota basis. A guideline
curriculum is provided, as are materials for arts
and crafts as well as audio-visual aids and books.
Training is provided on a regular basis. We are
always looking for volunteers.
St Mary’s contacts are Jo Mercer on
0774 7751676 or [email protected] or
Charlotte Hallawell on 0208 789 8069 or
[email protected]
All Saints’ contact: Marianne Coates on
0208 785 4827 or 0783 776 7891 or
[email protected]
If you are interested in learning more about Godly
Play, please contact
Caroline Donne on 020 8785 6302.
All Saints’ Baby &
Toddler Group
All Saints’ Church Putney Baby and Toddler
Group is for the local community. The group is
held in the church on Thursdays from 10.30am
to 12 noon, immediately after the family-friendly
Eucharist at 10.00am.
The group is held weekly and all carers with
pre-school children are welcome. A token
contribution of £2 per family will be charged.
St Mary’s Playgroup and
Jumping for Joy Service
The St Mary’s Playgroup meets every Tuesday
during term-time between 10.00 and 11.00am,
upstairs in the Brewer Building, St Mary’s
Church. Suitable for babies, toddlers and preschoolers with free play, activities table and
singing, with a £1 per child contribution. We
also hold a family friendly “Jumping for Joy”
service at 9.30am before the Playgroup to include
child-friendly prayers, songs, and bible story.
Please contact Louise Dent for further details at
[email protected]
St Mary’s Flowers
We are a small team of five ‘arrangers’ but are
keen to have additional helpers. You could do
something as simple as watering mid-week,
removing deadheads or working alongside one of
us to learn the ropes.
Contact Fiona Davis on 020 8871 0087.
For All Saints’ Flowers please contact
Nicky Taskis on 07967 596 245
St. Mary’s Creche Sunday Service
There is a creche run by CRB checked volunteers
every Sunday from 10am for parents in the
congregation who would like to drop off their
children and take part in the service without
distraction! It is open to all young children from
the age of 1 until they are ready to attend Sunday
school (c. 3 years old). If you are interested in
registering your child, then please contact creche
leader, Sophie Holdcroft on ansell.st@btinternet.
com or just turn up on the day and register
your child then. If you would like to become a
volunteer carer and to join our friendly rota team
then please contact Sophie too. More helpers
welcome! This service is completely free and is
held in Ailsa’s office (upstairs behind the lift).
Tea at Ten at All Saints’
The Putney Senior Social Group meets every
Monday morning from 10.00am - 11.30am at
All Saints’ Church. We are a friendly, welcoming
group who enjoy each other’s company and
conversation, as well as delicious homemade
cakes, fresh coffee and tea. Please join us - we
would love to meet you!
The St Mary’s Choir
Ever considered joining the choir at
St Mary’s? We meet every Tuesday from
8.00 - 9.00pm. You do not need any
experience, although an ability to read
music would be helpful.
If you are interested, please
email: Travis Baker on [email protected]
All Saints’ Choir
The All Saints’ adult choir meets on Sundays at
9.45am for the 10.30am Parish Eucharist.
Please contact Peter Foggitt
for information on 07894 991 685
St Mary’s Harmonic Minors
For children in years 4/5 and 6; meets Tuesdays
6.30-7.30pm Please contact Travis Baker for more information
or the Parish Office.
The Junior Singers
For more information contact
Lucinda Hitchings on 07799 067 911
The Junior Singers (Y1-Y6) rehearse
on Thursday afternoons at All Saints’ from
3.40pm to 4.25pm. They usually sing on the first
Sunday of the month at All Saints’ Church.
Bible Study Groups
For details, ring Alison Hunka on
020 8788 1031.
The daytime Bible Study Groups each meet every
two weeks in term-time only. The format is to
follow a book which focuses either on a particular
book of the Bible, or on a Biblical theme. There
is also one evening Bible Study Group meeting
fortnightly on Thursdays. We welcome people of
all ages and from both churches.
Contact Sarah Brearley on 020 8788 0592 or
[email protected]
Theology in the Pub
This is an informal group for people in the Parish
who are interested in socialising and chatting
about what it means to be Christian whilst living
and working in London. 
We meet weekly in the Bricklayer’s Arms on
Mondays at 8.00pm.
For more info please contact the
Church Office on 020 8788 4414 or join the Yahoo Group. To get details of
upcoming subjects, subscribe to the Yahoo group
[email protected]
1885 Singers
The All Saints’ 1885 Singers are always happy to
welcome new voices.
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Specialist
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Bicycles
Putney cycles- with our 3 stores
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with all your cycling needs.
Sales. Spares and repairs.
Visit www.putneycycles.com
for details
Fulham Floral Art Group
Inspiring demonstrations by
NAFAS qualified flower
arrangers. New members
welcome. Meetings on second
Wednesday of the month
2.00 – 4.00p.m.
United Reform Church, Fulham
Palace Road, (corner of Harbord
Street), SW6 6HY
Contact: Avril Charnock:
0782 480 9642
Home and Garden
Decorating
Rob Kelly. Decorator - interior and exte
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20 years’ experience. Top-quality finis
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For a free quote call Rob on 07761 2383
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Heating and Bathroom Installers
Gas safety registered. Fully insured.
All work guaranteed. Contact S.Beasley
on
020 8641 3403 or 07980 307014 or
[email protected]
Plumber
24/7 plumbing emergency call out.
Local
plumber, no call out charge. OAP and
and first
time user discount. Fully insured. No
job too
big or small. Call Tyrone 07904 8476
96 or
email [email protected]
Health and Beauty
General Handyman Service
Complete home refurbishment. Pain
ting and
decorating, partition walls, wallpaper
stripping
and hanging. Floor and kitchen fittin
g etc.
Call Remy on 07592 355529 and
www.handymanremy.co.uk
Hair Stylist
soon full
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Window Cleaning
Friendly and reliable window cleaner.
Call Rob on 07904 893177.
For further details, ring Alison Hunka on
020 8788 1031.
Bellringers
The Bellringers practise at St Mary’s every
Monday at 7.30pm. The Junior Bellringers have
their turn on Sundays after the morning service.
If you are interested, please contact the Tower
Captain, Sarah Hughes (Tuppen), through the
church office.
Pastoral Care Groups
Offer befriending and visiting to people in the
Parish. To volunteer or seek help contact:
St Mary’s:
Isobel Vass [email protected]
All Saints’:
Clemancy Gordon-Martin
[email protected]
or contact through Parish Office
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parish advertising
Please take time to read these adverts they help keep the Parish magazine free!
If you wish to support the Parish
Magazine by placing a display advert,
please contact James Anderson on
[email protected]
PROPERTY SERVICES
We can also help with advert design &
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• Classesforboysandgirls
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THEATRE
Enjoy the taste
LUNCHES of real homemade food
SALADS
at Putney Pantry
SOUPS
FRESHLY MADE
JUICES
HEALTHY FOOD
Putney Community Acupuncture
AFFORDABLE
ACUPUNCTURE
at St Mary’s Church
THURSDAYS 1 - 4pm
SANDWICHES
HOMEMADE
BREAD
QUIET TIME
BREAKFAST
HOMEMADE
Putney
Pantry
St Mary’s Church
PAN AU CHOCOLAT
For appointments
call 07817 791530
www.putneycommunityacupuncture.co.uk
BRIOCHES
CROISSANT
BARISTA
COFFEE
TEA
NAPLES ROASTED BEANS
AZTEC STYLE
HOT CHOCOLATE
St Mary’s Church
Putney High Street
London SW15 1SN
[email protected]
020 8789 1137
www.putneypantry.com
Mon 7.30am - 6pm
Tue 7.30am - 6pm
Wed 7.30am - 8pm
Thur 7.30am - 8pm
Fri 7.30am - 8pm
Sat 8am - 8pm
Sun 11am - 6pm
Chesterton Humberts Putney
Sales: 020 8246 5959 | [email protected]
Lettings: 020 8704 1000 | [email protected]
chestertonhumberts.com
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149 Upper Richmond Road, Putney, London SW15 2TX.