Page 25 - Here`s the Scoop
Transcription
Page 25 - Here`s the Scoop
Page 25 Putting the “Fun” in Fundraising for A.L.S. Yes: I am a dreamer. For a dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world. - Oscar Wilde Who says fundraising isn’t FUN? Tony Gize from Tony’s Mobile RV Services Ltd. has somehow managed to prove it can be. On top of raising $12,000.00 for A.L.S., which is better known as Lou Gehrig’s disease, a whole lot of fun was had by all. A silent auction, live auction, live entertainment, and an amazing meal put on by Killarney’s made for a very enjoyable evening, all in the effort of helping to find a cure for a very debilitating and fatal disease. On behalf of Tony, I know he wishes to thank all who helped organize the event, those that attended the event, and all those great Airdrie businesses that once again came through for auction items. The auctioneer from Adesa Auctions (awesome job), the incredible entertainer (Doug Taylor), and wonderful kitchen and waiting staff at Killarney’s, all contributed in a big way to make the event a HUGE success. Thank you to everyone! Pictured above: Mr. and Mrs. Vic Wiebe. Below: Doug Taylor and Tony Gize at the mic. Page 26 Here’s the Scoop Flies South Pictured here is Maizie Gannon taking a break from the Bacardi Rum Tour in Puerto Rico, to read the latest copy of Here’s the Scoop. The hero is one who kindles a great light in the world, who sets up blazing torches in the dark streets of life for men to see by. The saint is the man who walks through the dark paths of the world, himself a light. - Felix Adler, 1851 - 1933 Page 27 Easy Eggs One Sunday morning, while stationed at Osan Air Base in South Korea, I was in line for breakfast and noticed that the cook behind the counter looked kind of harassed. After I gave him my order, he asked me how I wanted my eggs. Not wanting to burden him further, I said cheerfully, "Oh, whatever is easiest for you." With that, he took two eggs, cracked them open onto my plate and handed it back to me. The Ten Ifs of Employment 1. If it rings, put it on hold. 2. If it clunks, call the repairman. 3. If it whistles, ignore it. 4. If it's a friend, stop work and chat. 5. If it's the boss, look busy. 6. If it talks, take notes. 7. If it's handwritten, type it. 8. If it's typed, copy it. 9. If it's copied, file it. 10. If it's Friday, forget it! How to Have Fun at Work 1. Find a way to change everyone's password to "chrysanthemum". Page 28 Shopping Frenzy I was browsing in a souvenir shop when the man next to me struck up a conversation. Just as he was telling me that his wife was getting carried away with her shopping, a brief power shortage caused the lights to flicker overhead. "That," he sighed, "must be her checking out now." Goodbye, Mother! Walking through a supermarket, a young man noticed an old lady following him around. He ignored her for a while, but when he got to the checkout line, she got in front of him. "Pardon me," she said. "I'm sorry if I've been staring, but you look just like my son who died recently. "I'm sorry for your loss," the young man replied. "Is there anything I can do for you?" "Well, as I'm leaving, could you just say 'Goodbye, mother!?' It would make me feel so much better." She gave him a sweet smile. "Of course I can," the young man promised. As she gathered her bags and left, he called out "Goodbye, mother!" just as she had requested, feeling good about her smile. Stepping up to the counter, he saw that his total was about $100 higher than it should be. "That amount is wrong," he said. "I only have a few items!" "Oh, your mother said that you would pay for her," explained the clerk. Page 29 By: Dan Phelps www.projectherbivore.com “The great of earth, how softly do they live.” - Ruth Tenney Elderly Drivers Two elderly women were out driving in a large car -- both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light." After a few more minutes they came to another intersection and the light was red again and again they went right though. This time the woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention to the road and the next intersection to see what was going on. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through. She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row! You could have killed us!" Mildred turned to her and said "Oh, am I driving?" Page 30 Child of the 80's If you can identify with at least half of this list then you, my friend, are a "Child of the 80's". 1. You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, Wax off". 2. You know that another name for a keyboard is a "Synthesizer". 3. You can sing the McDonald's Big Mac, Filet-O-Fish, Quarter Pounder, French Fry song while jump roping. 4. You know who "Mr. T" is. 5. You know who Fat Albert is. And also the boy with the pink mask. 6. You ever wore fluorescent, neon clothing. 7. You could break dance, or wish you could. 8. You wanted to be "The Hulk" for Halloween. 9. You believed that "By the power of Greyskull, you HAD the power!" 10. Partying "like it's 1999" seemed SO far away. 11. You thought that Transformers were more than meets the eye. 12. You wanted to be on Star Search. 13. You remember the Cabbage Patch Kids, and owned some. 14. You knew what Willis was "talkin' 'bout." 15. You HAD to have your MTV. (Continued on page 32) Page 31 A drop of water has the tastes of the water of the seven seas: there is no need to experience all the ways of worldly life. The reflections of the moon on one thousand rivers are from the same moon: the mind must be full of light. - Hung Tzu-ch'eng (Continued from page 31) 16. You wondered why Tootie always wore those skates. 17. You actually thought "Dirty Dancing" was a REALLY good movie. 18. You watched Purple Rain over and over again. 19. You remember the episode of Good Times when Flo broke down after James' funeral. 20. You remember when ATARI was a state of the art video game system. 21. You own any cassettes. 22. You were led to believe that in the year 2000 we'd all be living on the moon. Wine and cheese are ageless companions, like aspirin and aches, or June and moon, or good people and noble ventures. - M. F. K. Fisher 23. You remember and/or owned any of the Care Bear Glass collection from Pizza Hut. 24. Poltergeist freaked you out. 25. You carried your lunch to school in a Gremlins or an ET lunch box. 26. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the ONLY female smurf. 27. You know what leg warmers are and probably had a pair. 28. You wore biker shorts underneath a short skirt and felt stylish. 29. You had a Swatch Watch with the Swatch Guard. 30. You had Wonder Woman or Superman underoos. “The smile that flickers on baby's lips when he sleeps; does anybody know where it was born? Yes, there is a rumor that a young pale beam of a crescent moon touched the edge of a vanishing autumn cloud, and there the smile was first born.” - Rabindranath Tagore Page 32