What is a loving relationship?
Transcription
What is a loving relationship?
The Awesome Facts of Life Loving Relationships LOVING RELATIONSHIPS ? What is a loving relationship? There are different kinds of love. Love for your family. Love for a close friend. Love is a special feeling that we have for some people. We feel comfortable and safe when we are with them. We like being with them. We trust them. We are kind to them. We do our best for them. It is by knowing someone for a long time that you get to know the real person inside. You want to know what that person thinks in their head. You want to know what that person feels in their heart. You want to see how that person acts in many situations. Only then will you slowly build trust for him or her. That is when you may feel love, and know if that person cares about you. 54 The Awesome Facts of Life Loving Relationships MAKING A COMMITMENT The kind of love we are going to talk about now is romantic and sexual love. People who know each other for a long time and learn to trust each other may have a real love. They develop deep feelings for each other. They make a commitment to be together. A commitment is a promise. A commitment in a mature, loving, sexual relationship means a promise to have only one sexual partner. The two people in a mature sexual relationship do not have other romantic and sexual partners, just each other. They promise their love to each other only. Part of their love is romantic. Part of their love is sexual. They feel safe with each other. They feel responsible for their partner. They do not want to hurt the other person. This kind of relationship is the closest kind you can have. The two people consent to be in a sexual relationship. Consent means to agree. They agree to be sexual partners. They may want to be together for the rest of their life. 55 The Awesome Facts of Life Loving Relationships What do you think? 1. Diane and Gavin are dating. Diane calls Gavin her boyfriend but Gavin dates other women too. Do Diane and Gavin have a commitment? YES or NO Is it OK for Gavin to date other women? YES or NO What should Diane do? ________________________________________________________________ 2. Lee and Wes have known each other for a long time. They like to spend a lot of time together. They trust each other and have decided not to date other people. Do Lee and Wes have a commitment? YES or NO If Lee or Wes change their mind and want to date other people, what should they do first? ________________________________________________________________ 3. Anita is dating Carlos but she flirts with lots of other men. Do Anita and Carlos have a commitment? YES or NO If Carlos is not comfortable, what should he do? ________________________________________________________________ 56 The Awesome Facts of Life Loving Relationships Circle the right answer: TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 1. You just met someone on the bus. She asks you to meet her on Saturday at the bowling alley. TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 2. Lauren met Jerry last year at her best friend’s party. They have been dating every week and getting to know each other slowly. Jerry is very kind and treats Lauren with respect. TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 3. Amanda and Rachel just met two men at the amusement park. The men are very friendly and invite the women over to their apartment for pizza. TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 4. Sylvia and Bruce are dating. At the dance Bruce sees Sylvia slow dancing with another man and holding him very close. TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 5. Tony and Nikki are on their first date. Tony feels uncomfortable because Nikki is moving way too fast for him. TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 6. Tanya feels safe when she is with Eduardo. He always tells her the truth and keeps his promises. TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 7. Nina is only nice to Ivan when he buys her nice presents. TRUST or DO NOT TRUST 57 The Awesome Facts of Life Loving Relationships Answer these questions. 1. Who do you trust the most in your life? _______________________________ 2. How long have you known that person? _______________________________ 3. How do you know you can trust that person? ___________________________ ________________________________________________________________ 4. Do you think that trust is important in a sexual relationship? YES or NO 5. How long should two people know each other before they make a commitment to be sexual partners? ________________________________________________________________ 6. How would you know if you can trust another person enough to be your sexual partner? ________________________________________________________________ Warning! These are difficult questions! If you are having trouble answering these questions, that’s OK! You may not be ready yet to have a sexual partner. Healthy sexual relationships grow slowly and both people should feel ready to make a commitment to just one partner. 58 The Awesome Facts of Life Loving Relationships IMPORTANT MESSAGES FOR ME * I CAN LEARN WHO TO TRUST BY GETTING TO KNOW A PERSON SLOWLY. * I ONLY TRUST PEOPLE WHO TREAT ME WITH RESPECT. * I CAN HAVE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS THAT ARE CARING, EQUAL AND SAFE. 59