Cadaver-1989May31

Transcription

Cadaver-1989May31
The Rigor Mortis Issue
Non lllegitimus Carborundum
Volume XLlll , Number 7
A Student Publication of MCG
Wednesday, May 31, 1989
Despite the threat of rei n,
omore o
ar
The ophomor S ial Committee
wi h s to thank th following for their
involvement and participation in the
1 89 ophomor Parade.
Bruce Cohen Adela Casas Kathy
Mansfield, Dr. John Fisher, Lucy
Laney High chool Band, public safe.
ty, physical plant, float entries, Dr.
Puryear Dr.
ontgomery, Bonita
aundbau h curriculum office Janet
Lynch, andy Ara on Joe Webb and
th balloon crew Pratt and Dudley
Building Supply and parade judges
D . Ril y toming R
, Porterfield, Kuske, Boldt and Butt~rbaugh.
Editorial License
' ccuse
dia no i
nd II
microbiolo y
pathology p
fre hm n el tive clinical m dicine
problem solving
m dicin
n ti
di ase,
n th iolo
ophthalrnolo y ph rmacolog and
ndocrinology ar all pain in th a .
6A. Some are bi ger than olh r .
7. The equation equals MD is no
lon er valid· we mu l now use th
new special equation of Med School.
plus 380 equals MD which brings me
to my next point.
I have noticed on my brief stay at
this campus that we, the students at
M , suffer from an affliction known
s 'tunnel vision. This is not related
to th medical condition known a
apath . Each campus has its ebb and
hri t and flow of campus involvement and
perhaps we the 'children of th
flower children ' are truly the
gimm generation
but n verthele
I find it distressing to
campus and prof ional traditions
disregard .
Con · tently th
me few p opl
seem to patch together the facade of
unity while the majority tand idly by
- waitin to nap up the ben r . Th
ever-present ' what s in it for m ' or
' what's th point - it wont be on the
test, ' and ' I don't have time for
things lik that" sound around u like
trumpets brayin harshly in a small
room.
rm as guilty as anyone else and
uiltier than most f these heinous utterance . J'accuse ... all of us for
a,)tin our potential but I hope a we
grow we will leave this attitude
b hind u .
I r member a lecturer in Pha I. I
don t remember his nam , his position or what he looked like but I
remember what h said.
'Don t be a leech on your profession. Learn .from those who went
before you and teach those that come
after you.'
Though he was peaking to m dical
students he did not say the medical '
profession. These words are valid for
all of us at MCG. Since then I have
run across a more general view of the
same idea. I will leave you with thi
extract from th A ALE T of Confucius:
Th Master said: Th true man
can influence tho who ar above
him; th small man can onl infl u nee tho e who are below him. Th
e nee of th tru man i that of th
wind· the e enc of the small p ople
is that of the gra . And wh n a wind
pa es over th gra
it cannot
choo e but bend. A true man ... does
not mind not b in in office· all he
min about is wh ther he ha th
qualities that entitle him to offi e. He
does not mind failin to get r cognition· he is too busy doing the things
that entitle him to recognition.
Remarkably poignant 2500 years
later at M
The Boss.
Page~
-
if':\--------------
Wednesday, May 31, 1989, Medical College of Georgia
MALCOLM TE.NT£
HEY DOC:
Why does it seem that we have more
custodians and painters here at M
than we have students?
Puzzled
Puzzled those aren't real painters
and cu todians. They ar spies
planted by the NatJooaJ Board of
Medical Examiners to see what areas
you opbomore aren t studying.
HEY DOC:
I want to buy a Playboy, but I
always lose my nerve at the COWlter
and buying a pack of gwn instead.
What can 1 do?
Timid
Timid, I sugge t you just walk right
in there with confidence and buy all
the damn Playboys you want. My wile
alway says that a real man shouldn t
top unUl be gets what b wants. At
least I think that's what sbe says.
Well, I cant really remember what
f?hino Uof
Mlsuuderslood
I remember (now I musl kill U)
Sudd~n ram.tom violence
6olloc1 of i:1 moron
The fCJI kid
SI
2
Musclemon studboys
life's hollow pfeosures
lhrill murder street
lhe world's a tube
1'lve on a fount.>oy·s w<19es
(dcmce version)
she say , but I U ask her and g t back
to you.
HEY DOC:
My girl friend ha Klin mithEisenhower-Fr ate llo-Ki buki yndrome. At first l thought I could handle it. I mean, she's kind of ugly, but
she's very sweet. Shes obese has
hypertension and coardation of the
aorta, but she makes a killer tWla
casserole. The first time we made
love some of tho
purulent
caseating pustules on her abdomen
ruptured and oh what a mess. Now
I'm wondering if I can cope.
Zit
Zit, I think you bett r h ld ou to b r.
While you're in M d chool in
Augu ta, you're not likely to do much
better. Try alternating positions to get
uniform tougbeoing of the pustule on
her thighs, rump and back too.
The Cadaver is an M.C.G. STUDENT Publication
Published slightly aboveiJfound about five times per year: FalJ 1988
(November), The Res-Erection Issue; Winter 1989 Qanua.ry}, The New
Year's lssue; Mid-Winter 1989, (The Copulation Issue); Spring 1989, Spring
Break Issue; and May 1989 (Rigor Mortis Issue)
CADAVER EDITORIAL STAPH
Co-Editors: Bill Dion, Mike Garrett; Business Manager: Mike Garre 1,
Photography: Mike Garrett, Chris Gibbs; Artwork, Amy Hutchinson, J.P.
Saleeby, Ron Collins; Staph Writers: Joe "Meat" Webb, Adolph "Doc"
Casa! , Marian Rhame III , Will Garrett, Tooth and Nail, Jon and John, Matt
Taylor.
Dental faculty summer enrichments set
BY TOOTH AND NAO..
Interim Dean, Dr. David Meyers announced the swruner enrictunents as
recommended by the ADA Accredita~
tion Committee Reports.
Dr. Meyers commented "The
primary function of the faculty
enrictunents will be nurturative in
nature, but some faculty will need
remediation."
Well, we all know what lll8t means.
Dr. Meyers also selected Dr. A. Rahn
as the supervisor of the faculty
enrictunents and course director of
the faculty remediations in AudioVisual 099r. The course is expected to
cover the following topics:
Slide proficiency - Faculty will be
required to advance 10 slides without
the proJector jamming or reversing
the slides. the faculty will also receive
instructions on correlating the slide
presentations with the handouts- im-
agine that!
Pointer Proficiency - Faculty will
be required to hit a two inch target
area on a projected slide and maintain the target arrow in that area for a
period of 90 seconds.
Slide Legibility Instruction Faculty will be strongly encouraged
to produce slides that are clearly
readable from the majority of seats in
the lecture halls.
Super 16mm Film Seminars - The
entire anatomy faculty will be required to run those great films
without any malfunctions of the projectors. If a malfunction does occur
the faculty will be trained to make
repairs within five minutes. Thus
eliminating the need for Larry. Moe
and Curly of classroom services.
All f acu.lty will be given formal instruction and practice in dimming
Volun ~ttr:s
f-,.
G-,;Uo+iM~
Raeo.rcn
and adjusting room lighting as well as
usage of the microphones.
It sounds like these faculty
enrichments will show the faculty the
true meaning of Camp Rahn.
A
UAfl IA•M
UU\l•ANU
STATE FARM INSURANCE COMPANIES
HOME OFFICES: BLOOMINGTON, ILLINOIS
e
O.B. BROWN
Agent
Open 7 a.m. - 2:30 p.m.
June 5-9
Beach Towel
Week
At
Student Center
Cafeteria
1515 Walton Way
. Augusta
Office: 722-0245
.The
Highlander
Inn
A British Pub
British Ales & Stouts and
other fine imports.
ENGLAND'S BEST
BASS
DRAUGHT
Pint la tbe csaA
FREE
the
f~1r.j t
SIC e
,
-i-·-·.
Scotch Eggs - Pork Pie
Coca-Cola
~
\
Beach Towels
Drawn For Daily
ABI Food Services, Inc.
Pizzas - Sandwiches
SPORTS.MEN WELCOME
7VandDARTS
Boan: lloDday·Friday S p.m. antil
Satmday noon-midnigbt
Five minutes from MCG
Just over 13th Street Bridge
133 Georgia Ave., North Augusta
Medical College of Georgia, Wednesday, May 31, 1989 -
Page 3
What Kind of People Write the Cadaver?
You already know who reads the
Cadaver: Dr. Teabeaut, Dr. Tedesco
Dr. Wray, Dr. Boldt, Dr. Devore and
you. But did you ever sit down and
think to yourself, "What kind of pe<r
pie write this shit?" Well, this is your
chance to find out. What kind of peopie write the Cadaver? We do, your
very own, deluxe, hand-picked,
Let's start off with the leaders of
slightly-to-the-left (and right)-nonn, this 43-year-old bird cage liner,
obsessive- compulsive, Cadaver "Wild" Bill Dion and ' Mad Dog"
staphers.
Mike Garrett. What can be said of
them? Everything. They are the
Cadaver, heart and soul. They do the
maj.ority of the writing. Editorial
Licence, the main story, the top-ten
lists you name it. They are the
greatest. They are intelligent,
trustworthy, loyal obedient,
perverse, lacking in all moral fiber,
will chase
undersexed and, of c ur
anything with at least two ' x'
Chromosomes and large breasts no
Klinefelter Superwomen or mosaics
please.! )
They are great guys and well on
their way to becoming the finest
physicians to ever graduate M G
( eds.-and we ought to know ) .
Together, these two fine young
physicians-in- training have turned
this once-scorned publication into its
current status of literary beauty. The
Harvard Lampoon staff should be so
lucky. And yes girls, they are
available for your every wish.
Next on our list is Joe " Meat"
Webb. Joe is the No. 3 man here at the
Cadaver and if you ever wondered
where " Meat" got his name, well,
rwnor has it that beck in the late 70s
' Meat" needed some quick cash to
support a q.i.d. habit of topical minoxidil and "posed for some rather
suggestive" photos in an early variation of Playgirl magazine ; of course,
they turned him down and Joe was
forced to get a job at the local Kroger
as a late night butcher, thus the
nickname.
JMW's
c Jumn,
' Meat-on-the-Beat ' has touched on
some sensitive areas here at MC including: cheating, lack of study space
for students ambiguous test answers
and editorial privile
(you didn t
really think we would really print that
one, did you Joe ? .
Hey Doc is Adolph asal
course five seconds after this issue
hits the stand Adolph will be kicked
rmt nf c::rhool. well better him than us.
We think Adolph will become a
gynecologist, become successful,
retire after 25 years of practice and
write his memoirs, " In Pursuit of the
Suppurati •e Beaver," sure to be a
DOC/Cadaver 'Rat-Race' set
Doctors Ought to Care (DOC) and
the Cadaver sponsored the 12th annual " Rat Race," a three mile roadrunning event, Friday, May 5 at 10
a.m.
The race with a field of more than 50
runners, tarted off the 1989
h mec min events and festivities .
articipants in the event each receivd the official Rat-Race T- hirt and
th opportunity to walk home with on
f he thr e trophie .
The field c nsisted of mo tly n vice
runners but few xperienc d racer
u h
hri olb and Alli on uca
C th r n th ew York Marath n)
als took part. Within th field a f w
·p ial entrie in lud d ' hubby '
l od an ngli h Sh ep dog owned
y
errard Mc leod and Robert
or an of the Sophomore Cla of th
chool f Medicine who push d his
tw children ·n a str ller th ntire
thr mile di tan . The top male and
female finishes and their times are as
follows:
Women: Third place, Donna
Robe rts
21: 11
(Sophomore
i ine · Second place, Allison
a . :32 Medical Illustration)·
and first place Kappa Peddy, 18:35
(Freshman Medicine .
Men: Third place Mike Price, 15 :57
(Freshman Medicine ; Second place,
Jerry Pearson, 15:34· First place,
Steve White, 14 :57.
We here at th adaver would like
to thank all persons who helped us
with the Race, especially Chris Colby,
IqubaJ Garcia, Jill Sims, Dan Horth,
Beth Schnars, Jenny and Barry from
DOC (thanks for the funding ) and all
those who entered, breathed hard and
sweated. See ya next year.
d1u¥zy & J-(ofinwn
Prescription Opticians
Since 1946
15°/o Discount To All V.H., M.C.G.,
and V.A. Personnel With/ID
best-seller.
The infamous Guido-de-LoungeLizard, a/k/a Marian Levan Rhame
m, what can be said of him? Well,
Marian is ... Marian. You really need
to meet this guy. Sorry girls, he's
married.
Tooth and Nail are the Cadaver's
own Dental School reporter (s). Yea
we know they're tooth-fairies, but
otherwise they're A-okay and by incorporating the Dental School news '
in the Cadaver Tooth and Nail have
helped us expand this rag to the unprecedented stature the Cadaver now
has on the MCG campus (eds.·we lay
this shit on thick, don 't we?).
Two Cents from the Faculty: we
realJy don't know who this guy is and
even if we did, idle threats and car
bombings couldn t make us tell. We do
hope he knows how much we appreciate the time and the input that he
has given to us. (No, Ors. Boldt and
Weidman1 we won't give hints!).
The artists of this year's Cadaver:
Amy {Med School is Hell), J.P. (The
Fart Side) and Ron Collins (Rhino
Boy) are all talented people, a little
twisted, but talented nonetheless.
Amy, what's with the HUGE peace
sign? And what is to become of Rhino
Boy, only Ron knows, of course we
really can't say anything bad about
him because he knows both Cynthia
and Carolyn over at the Dugas
Building, and he might put in a "good
word" for us. Hi-ya Babes.
... and Hey, what about thee articles from nursing students? Well it
seems as though they stopped bein
written just about time one of them
stopped dating one of our Cadaver
staphers.
Other pseudo-staph m mbers who
wrote one or two article need mention including Will Garrett John
McManus Jon Sorhon Matt Taylor
Mike Worley, cott Smith Jill Sims
Cat Gutfriend, Denise Punger and
also, Pat Capes, Inchol Yun and Bill
Terrel (who got their picture in the
yearbook but didn't do diddly. )
This was your Cadaver Staph for
1988-89 year. Can you believe that
these people are going to be
"licensed" professionals one day.
Scary, isn't it.
'The Cadaver we've been rode
hard and put up wet.,,
Microbioville
Living on T cells
Listening to Brownell
Tell us how viruses make ANA .
Learning 'bout tissues.
Hearing diemmers.
Wonder if •iMama" is teaching today?
Wasting away again in Microbioville .
Searching for my handout .
Some people say that there 's Tedesco to blame .
But I know , it's my own damn fault?
Don't know the reason
This room is so freezin '
Is this the way they keep us a a e?
So teacher keep readin '
About bacteremia.
'Cause all of the class will be gone at the break .
Wasting away a ain in Microbioville
Searching for my handout .
Some people say that there 's Tedesco to blame ,
But I know its somebody else 's fault .
I failed the last test
Just like all the rest.
Now I won 't get to cruise on Bulk Home .
But there 's more handouts to learn ,
Cause Mama is so stern
Looks like a summer in Augusta from now on .
Wasting away again 1n Microbioville
Searching for my handout .
Some people say that there 's Tedesco to blame
But I I< ow . it's May Ellen's fault .
Page 4 -
f(\l.Jll"
I,.r-.A. )~
0
f')
e
• • THE NATIONAL
•
•
T
01"'\A
D\)
l.J'.Jl"\I'
EX AM
Wednesday, May 31, 1989, Medical College of Georgia
Long ago, there was a remote
kingdom called Perinea located in the
lower quadrants of the region of
Epigastria. This land was ruled by the
good king Meatus Extemus and his
beautiful wife Urethra.
Beloved by his people, Meatus ruled
the land of Perinea with a stron but
ere's a look at homecoming
By Matt Taylor
home oming festivities are as fun and
exciting. Until then enjo whatever
Well now that all of the excitement summer ha in stor for you and we 11
a died down over the annual see ou in th fall.
h me oming festivities here at MCG ,
·e can take a brief lo k at some of the
igh ights of the day events:
T enty Dental students were ar~
r t d and charged with once again
ttempting to disrupt the ophomore
parade by throwing water balloons
from the third story of the dental
building. Charges were quickly dropped, however, when the arresting officers found out that the dents were
actually throwing water-filled condoms. It seems that the students were
given the condoms as part of a "safe
sex' lecture and didn't know there
was another use for them.
Said the arresting officer, Bob ''Get
a Haircut" Jenkins, 'We just felt too
sorry for them after that."
In a stunningly exciting tug-<>r-war
match, the sophomore meds beat a
trash-can on the opposing side that .someone had tied the rope a.roWld. Since
the actual match was a draw, a decision was reached by comparing the
personalities and humanistic trai.t s of
the two sides. In a 3-2 decision, the
sophomore meds narrowly beat the
trash can and advanced into the final
round.
Francis J. Tedesco took his place in
the history of MCG as he accepted the
Presidency of this fine institution. Dr.
Tedesco joined the ranks of such
famous celebrities as RWl-DMC and
The Beastie Boys by wearing a large
pendant dangling from what looked
like a motorcycle chain aroWld his
neck. The origin of the pendant seems
to be a bit of a mystery but the hood
ornament of the governor's limousine
and several yards of chain surroun·
d · g the student center were later
reported missing.
We can only hope that next year's
Physic I
kingdom lay the dark realm of the become strained and weakened. .
emperor Viscus Intestinalis and his Viscus had been exerting pressure on
wicked queen Adnexa.
the region for lo these many years.
Things had been calm and complaIn his mind, Viscus considered th
cent in the idyllic land of Perinea. So logistics of invading the land of
calm in fact that little did the good Perinea. Should he trike directly ea t
kin~ know that his northern border
of the inferior tributary · f the
Epigastrial iver, or attempt an indirect feint through the treacher us
Rings of In uinal.e. Much had to b
considered.
Viscus summoned hi
neral
Valsalva, who would lead the h rnial
horde to oil the irgin land. urtively, the Queen Adnexa withdrew to h r
chambers while her husband nd hi
general discu ~ ed the inva i n.
Waiting for her in her boudoir wa h r
ecret lover Scrota who loyal rvices, unbeknownst to Adnexa , wer
retained by Meatus Externu .
As Scrota sipped from her ampulla
of water Adnexa confided her hu band's ambitions for Perinea. On
heari.ng this, Scrota moved quickly to
the stables saddled his fateful steed
Cremaster and quietly withdrew back
into the land of Perinea.
Weeks pass and our story finds King
Meatus and his commander
Epididymis on the Plains of
Transversalia. Though unsure of the
exact route Meat us had learned from
his wise teacher Colbornius, the Grey
Haired, that the hernial horde would
most likely choose the indirect gambit. Massing his troops at the Rings of
Inguinale, Meatus awaited his foe.
Dawn found Meatus and Viscus face
to face on the plains of battle near the
rings. Viscus's
eneral, Valsal a
pressured the hernial horde aero
th va t river Defer n a Meatu ·
army avul ed to either ide. The
fightin wa heavy, and the train of
battle soon begins to how on both
sides. When, uddenl , hatterin th
cacophony of battl
a voice
thundered from th h a en . . . ka
Mr. Jone , if ou would pl a
your h ad an ou h.
WHERE FRIENDS AND SPIRITS MEET
733-6400
• DRAFT SPECIAL
Wednesday &Thursday Nights Pitchers $250 All Night
• THE. BEST OF LIVE
'ENTERTAINMENT
·GAME ROOM
•GREAT FOOD
1936 Walton Way
Augusta
Medical College of Georgia, Wednesday, May 31 , 1989 -
Page 5
ATTENTION M.C.G. STUDENTS
AND AMATEUR SPORTSMEN,
THIS IS THE DAY YOU HAVE WAITED FOR:
T:J{'E J11(S7' J49{?{11U
N
X ILL <TJ{( i.5'E '1JJ4!Jv{?{ SQV.I'l('R'ELS ""
'l{f(jJ-f<T !!
I
Dear
Nursing Boards
.91.'T' TJfE 16 M'E O~ TE'R._'l(f ~W~"E U.'D.
FRIDAY,
JUNE 2nd, 1989
@
booster,
7:00p.m.
<Excerpts from actual letters*
Stanley H. Kaplan has rea?ived from
satisfied NCLEX-prep takers.)
"LET'S ALL HELP SAVE DR. KUSKE'S NUTS"
(CAUSE HE NEVER GET'S ANY!!)
"Not passing the NCLEX the first time was the worst
thing to happen to me ...taking Kaplan was the best thing
@[f)~~~~[L ~ © lMM $~ ~
fve ever done .....
IF YOU STAY LATE, YOU'LL RECEIVE A SAMPLE OF
MIKE, BILL, AND BETSY'S- SOUTHERN BAVARIAN - Jf'.Pl'L'E 'TO'Kfl!
-Student from Berkel~ California
I feel that your nursing program is solely responsible
for my 550 point increase ..."
-Student from Birmingham, Alabama
('J.llfTH'l.UM{S, 0') CO'll'R.S'E!!)
"I hadn't studied for my first NQEX and did not pass.
Kaplan really motivated me to study hard to achieve a
passing score the second time around ... "
- Student from New York City. New York
the f(1rt sicfe
No one but Kaplan gives you small classes led by experienced nurses, and a tape review series. So if you
want the best and most experienced in test prep, do what
these RNs did . Call Kaplan!
'fYOU1>ll
c
10 fAO
~tus
[lfl f Sii C HE
KAPLAN
STANlEY H. U Pl AN lDUCATIOtW. CINTB UD.
Classes tor nursing boards start June 6. Call today!
The a aver
Top Ten List
BYT
HA
With all due apolo ie to avid ttennan, a recent survey revealed
some interesting motives for the h rding of the open clinic set-ups:
10. Use the headrest cover on your
car s bucket seats.
9. Use the alwninum foil to wrap a
baked potato - ould they give us le~ ?
8. Use the high speed evacuation tip
with an enema bag.
7. Use those baggies for your sandwich lunches.
6. Use those patient napkins at
home when serving lobster.
5. Cut slow speed suction tip into
small pieces, thread floss through and
wear as a necklace.
4. Use cotton tip applicators for do it
yourself OB-GYN.
3. Use large plastic bag as
'emergency only" condoms cut to
size ).
2. Place cotton rolls in mouth and
talk like the 'Don' of removable pro-
sthodontics - ' Hush little partial don 't
you cry .. . '
1. Take them just to p~ off the
Dean ' of third floor central supply.
It's o.k. folks we ll make more.
We're here to help you.
(EDITOR'
OTE - Tooth and
Nall I written by a group of Dental
tudents who really don t give a hit
about what anyon think ab ut
them. )
c "'~~~
(
Outdoor
Traders
Sportsnians Center
The CSRA's Leader In Backpacking And Camping Gear
Woo/~·
·
13,.;,,
IChS
'9 CJot'--
''88
If
You Like
The OutDoor Catalogs
You Will Love Our Store
860-0854 • 3309 Washington Road • Augusta
Page 6 -
Wednesday, May 31, 1989, Medical College of Georgia
The Last Two Cents From Faculty
Well, it's the last mue of the year.
Before we close up shop for the swnmer, I thought I would give you all a
little final quiz (I'm a faculty member
- giving quizzes and exams are instinctive) on what we all should have
learned over tbe past year.
1. The Dean of the School of
Medicine/Dentistry/ Allied
Health/ ursing/Graduate Studies
take your pick):
a . is a complete myste to me
b . i a complete my tery t any n
in the late of orgia
c). moonlights on weeken a part
of th entertainment pa ka e at the
Discotheque
d). is an inunaterial, usel s concept, since we all know who really
calls all the shots around here anyway
2. Student education at MCG:
a). is emphasized and supported at
all levels of the administration
b). is carried out by dedicated caring faculty that give their all towards
their teaching responsibilities
c). is the biggest contradiction in
temis I've ever hears
3. the physical fitnes.5 facilities on
the MCG campus are:
a). adequate
b). more than adequate
c). excellent
d). best described by four letter
words that the editors absolutely
refuse to print
. The highest priority of the administration at MCG is
a .
b). lots of$$$
c). lots and lots of
d . an incredible amount of
e . all of the above
5. If I had one word to describe ed ' Drunken, Idiotic, Sex~tarved
MCG, it would be
Medical Students - Are We a Nation
at Risk?"
a). bad
I will let you figure out the correct
b . fair
c). good
answers, but they should be obvious.
d). excellent
Seriously, I have enjoyed being able
e . unbelievably obscene and pro- to write this column over the past
bably involving the use of anatomical year. Its given me an opportunity to
vent my feelings about some of the
parts that I got wrong on the ro
Anatomy final
things happening at MC , and I hope
And for extra credit, here s the last you'd all enjoyed my littl contributions.
question :
Special thanks to Bill and Mike who
6. Bill Dion and Mike arr tt :
n t only ff ered me thi opportunity
a ). are th e itor of th
adaver
b). will announce weddin plans but also through their efforts, saved
nd improved the Cadaver for generawithin th n xt 2 to 3 months
c . have be n seen wearing tions of readers to come. and for those
women' lothin and makin rud of you who are still tryin to guess the
suggestions to various and sundry identity of the mystery faculty columfrestunan medical students when at nist, I 11 give you one little hint. I've
been told by countless numbers of
the Red Lion
d). will soon appear as themselves women that my talents are endless.
on a new Geraldo Rivera show entitl- Have fun guessing.
The sophomore
parade awards
The recipients of awards for the
Sophomore Parade were as follows:
Best Disguised Fire Truck, MCG
Po ·ce Car No. 149; Grand Prize PTs;
Second Prize, Medical Records;
Third Pri1.e, Sophomore Trojans;
Theme Prize, OTs- Keep it Clean;
Wish-Fulfillment Prize, Homecoming
Court; Classiest, WFA Ship; Mo.9t
Original, Junior Nurses; Special
T~Always Exciting, Band; Mom
Poignant, Faculty Float; Most
Penetrating, Rad Tech; Cleanest,
Dental Hygiene; Dead Last Award,
Freshmen.
'B'Bl'llPJ 'B!l{,'Bl'l(
Medical Student Discounts
Shampoo, Cut & Dry
$7 Men
sa Women
Located across from WRDW Radio on Watton Wrt
1530 Walton Way• 724-4247
v\Jl ll • g ll eft CIt UnlfORffi SHOP
LAB COATS • LAB JACKETS
PANTS • PANTS SUITS
•DRESSES
TOPS• SHOES
Monogramming
Hours; Monday-Friday 10 a.m.
- 5:30 p.m.
Saturday 1Oa.m. - 4 p.m.
1519 Central Avenue
738-1147
Critics Corner
with Ben Dover
You know, I heard lot of p ple
say this year's Stunt ight wasn't as
ood as last year or even th year
before's. Wheth r or not that is true is
a question of opinion and, weU who
reaUy gives a hoot anyway.
Ea h class has put on a Stunt ight
and w did it for nly one rea n - to
have fun with our cla ma .
This year' tunt i ht like other
tunt i hts is an example of a uniqu roup f individuals who, n aring
th end of a very lon and traumati
intricution to m dicine band tog ther
to har fun at the humero expense
of everyone and the true exp n of no
one.
Well don Cla of 1992. Before you
know it it will be time to plan the
???????.
XYTEX needs sperm dOnors between the agn
Of 18-35, to help make the dreams of childless
couples come true. While you help them we'll
help you by paying 50 per acceptable
sample from qualffled donors.
Call today tor Information. All calls are strictly
.confident/al•.. .,_. ,,.~."".k'·
SUNSHINE BAKERY
oa· y Double $235
Turkey Deluxe ith
Cup of Soup
Mondly
Tuesday
Wtdnesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Potato
Split Pea
Pinto Bean
Potato
Barley & Bean
Lentil
23(1111
~
Unique specialties:
• Sinai Kosher Com Beef
'711 A
•Pastrami on our Sourdough Rye
I~..,•Enjoy our Soup of the Day (better than homemade)
• Select from 25 fine, Imported Beers
SUNSHINE BAKERY at 1209 Broad Street
'J'f
"It's What You Wanr
QUALITY SCREEN PRINTlNG
ON LOCATION
Let us help you with
Sport Team Uniforms
FamilyReunions
Sch I Groups
Church Organizations
Businesses
"It is where I shop - shouldn't you?"
Immediate Transfer T·Shirt Shop
2541 Peach Orchard Road
793-6048
Medic;lt College of Georgia, Wednesday , May 31 , 1989 -
Page 7
First year residency match results 1989
First year residency appoint.men for 198M9 n-
lud .
atthew K. Abel - Unive lty of Alab mA
H ptal, B nningham, AL, fNMDPRE .
Hisham S. Aboulkhair - Memorial Medi al
enter. vannah, A, FAPC.
muel F. Adams - North Carolina Memorial
H pitaJ, Chapel Hill, NC. INMO.
Renee M. And rson - Memorial Medical
mer, vaMah.. GA , INMO.
Eliz.abeth A. Appel - Boston 'ly Hospital ,
B on, MA , IN
.
Br
. Appelbaum - UnJv ol CaHforni Irvine, range, A, PSYCH.
uy . Arnall Emory Univ School of Medicine,
tlan , A, SUR .
Beth A. Baisden - Medical College of Geor ·a .
Augl.dt.a, A, PE .
Vlr I E. Beall - Emory Uriv
hool of
e<icine, AUant.a, GA, TRANS. PHYSMDR.
M lanl R. Be rden - Memorial Medi al
rt , vaMah, A, OBGYN.
Raymond A. Bedgood - Roanoke Memorial
H pita~ • Roanoke, VA , F APC.
of
Frank R. Ber men - Medical Coll
G gla , Au ldta, A, PED
Gloriaana Bernard - Med cal Colleg ol
eol'fPa, Augldta. GA, PEDS.
erald K. Brantley - mercer Univ School of
Medicine, Macon, GA , INMD.
Tracy A. Bri es - Univ of Alabama Hosptial.
B nningham , AL, J'NM .
Robert . Britanislcy - Georgi a Baptist Medi
nter, AUanta. A, SURGPRE.
I .orie L. Brown - Medi cal Colle
f Georgi •
A usta , A, SUR .
J de.son B. Brue - Eastern VA Gradual
School of Medicine. orfolk, VA, FAPC.
Michael A. Bw-k - Duke Univ Medical
t r,
Dlriwn, NC, PSYCH.
avid A. Bussey - Pitt Co Memor al
Hospit.al/ECU Sch Med, Gr~vW. NC, INMD.
Doro01y E. Byrer - E t Tenne
Slate Uriv,
Johnson ty , TN, FAPC.
Juaqulta 0 . Callaway - G«>rgia Baptist
Medical CeiUr. Atlanta, Ga, OBGYN.
Mark E. Carithers - Spartanburg Regional
Medical Center. Spartanburg, ~. TRANS Medical College of GeorfPa, Augmta, GA , ANES
William C. CtUholm - Spartanburg Regional
Med cal Center, Spartanburg, SC, FAPC.
Oougl
F. iuba - Georgia Baptist Medical
nter, AUanta, A, TRA~ .
Anthony R. Jary - Gel.sinser Medical Center,
anville, PA, OBGYN.
Da vi d A. Cole - Georgia Baptist Medical
Center, Atlanta, A, TRANS.
Kimberly A. Collim - North Carolina Baptist
Medical Hospital, w~ I m, NC. PATii.
Le
R. oll
- Memorial Medical Center,
avannah, GA , J'NMD.
Fr nklin G. onner - Medical College of
Geor , Augusta, GA, JNMO.
Kim A. Cook - Delayed.
rl R. Cooley - UAH/HuntsviUe Hospital ,
Huntsville, AL, F
Jam I~ Coone tta Urit.Univ TN Coll
of Medicine, Chattanooga, TN, TRANS.
Her rt W. Copeland - Bays tale Medical Cert er
Inc., Springfield, MA , PEDS.
J .n . Corbin - Delayed.
Chad T. Couch - North Carolina Baptist
H pita! Win.s~I m, C, UROL.
Seema R. ukM - Univ of LouiJviUe School cl
Medicine, Louisville, KV , PE .
Paul E. Cundey - Uriv r Alabama Hospital,
B1mungham, AL, rN
.
Lea A. Danielsen - Medical
lie of Geor a.
August.a , GA, PSYCH.
Mark . Oeguerther - U!Sv of Tenne
College ol Medicine, Memphls, TN, SURGPRE,
UROI..
Nichol A. Demartini - H
lal of Unjv of
Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, P , PSYCH .
James T. Doug!
- - Floyd Medical Center,
Rome. GA. FAPC.
GabraeUa Drake - Univ of Cincinnati Hospital,
' nciMati , OH , PEDS.
Anita J . EUis - Univ of TX Health
ience
' nt.er, n Ant.onio, TX, PEDS.
of Georgia,
Otbra C. E~lish - Medical Coll
Augusta, GA, FAP .
Carltoo T. Faulk - Medical CoUe of Georgl ,
Augl&Ua, GA, TRAN .
RJchard . Fishnan - Medical University of
outh Carolina. Charles~n. SC, ANES.
Michael T. ortson - St . Vincen Medi cal
Center , Jacksonville, FL, FAPC.
Scott R. Fowler - Medical CoUe of Georgia.
AuglSa , GA, OBGY .
Pamela . Garris - Medical College of Georgi ,
AuglSa, GA, BGYN.
Joe . Gukl.n.s - Memorial Medical Ce.nt.er,
Savannah. GA, OBGYN.
Memorial Regional
Jack . ay - Tallah
Med Ctr, Tallaha.uee, Fl., FAPC.
Gre ry A. Gerlock - East Tem
Stat
Unlv, Johnson City, TN, FAPC
Hugh M. l~ter - George Washington Univ
H~plla1, Wuhin~ DC, I MDPRE.
William E. Goldberg - Medcal Coll
of
eorgia, Augusta, GA, INMO.
Jefferson T. Gordon - Floyd Medical Ce.nt.er.
Rome, A, FAPC.
Phillip N. ray - Floyd Medical Center, Rome,
a, FA .
Joseph . Greenhaw - Jacksonville Health
EducatJon Program, Jack.sonvill • FL, OBGYN.
Michael P. Gruber - North Carolina Bapt l
Hospital, Wimton-Salem, C, ORTH .
Richard E. Guice - North Carolina Baptist
Hospital, Winston-Salem, N , 0 Y .
Robert E. Hancock - Univ ct Texa SW Medi al
School, OM! , TX. ORTH .
John W. Hanson - YaJ New Haven Hospital,
Ne Haven, CT, PATH.
Thom L. Hatchett - Bayfront Medical Center,
. Petenturg. FL, OBGY .
Mark A. Hayes - Univ of IW.nois/Sl . Franc
Medical Cent.er, Peoria, IL, FAPC.
Lari M. Herr~ - North Carolina Baptist
Hospital , Winston-Salem, N , INMD .
John S. Hill - Medcal College of Ge.orgla,
Augusta, GA , ANES.
Melisa M. Holmes - Medical Coolie
of
Virginia. ructmond.. VA. OBGYN.
Mary H. Honkanen - Univ of Hawaii lrte
Medical Residency, Honolulu , HI, lNMDPRM.
Robert H. Hopiam - Univ of Arita
for
Medical Sc ences, Uttle Rock, AR, MEDPEOS.
Mi hael A. Horseman Univ of
Florida/Alachua General Hospital, Gainesville,
FL, FAPC.
Jeffrey L. Johnson - Jacbonville Health
EducatJon Program, Jadtsonville, Fl., RA~X .
Renee H. Johnson - Medical College of Georgia,
Augusta, GA, PEOS.
Michael 0. Jones - Medical College of Georgia.
Augusta, GA. FAPC.
Rlcha.rd M. Jones - Univ of Maryland Medical
System. Balt.unore, MD, SURG, OTOLAR.
Sasl R. Ka.I It boor - Memorial Medical Center,
Savannah, GA, SURGPRE.
ow B. Kalish - Medi cal College of Georgia,
Augusta, GA , PE
AMemarie I. Kasper - San Mateo Me.nt.al
Health Serive , San Mateo, A, PSYCH.
Paul D. Kellam - Emory Univ School of
Medi 'ne, Atlanta, GA, SURGP , OTOL.AR.
Jame M. Keme<ty - Univ of New Muico
School of Medicine, Albuquerque, M, PEDS.
David J. Kimbrell - Carraway Melhoclst.
Medi I Cent.er, Birmingham, AL, PE .
William R. ~ - Ba~ Medical Centers,
Birmingham, AL, I MD.
William C. Lambert - Mercer Uriv School of
Medicine, Macon, GA , F APC.
John S. Lammert - Medical Colle ol Georgi .
Augu ta, GA. rNMD.
Peter M. Laye - Oeasoness Medical Cent.er,
Spokane, WA, TR.A .
Elizabeth A. Lee - Vertura County Medical
Center, VeJ:tw-a, A, FAPC.
Arden L. Levy - Yale.New Haven Hospital, New
Haven, CT, PEDS.
Judith A. Lewi.9 - Univ of Texas SW Medical
School, Dallas, TX, lNMD.
Thomas J . Le · - Vanderbilt Uriv Medical
enter, Nashville, TN , £NMO.
- Memorial Medical Center,
Tonya L. Le
S vannah,
A, INMDPRE, Penn Stal
Univ/Milton S. Hershey Med Ctr, Hershey, PA ,
OPlfI'H.
Mary T . Lockhart - Carraway Methodist
Med1cal Center. Blrmi.ngt.m, AL. FAPC.
William L. Lockhart - Carraway Meltodist
Medical Center. Bl~ham, AL, TRANS, Univ of
Alabama Hospital, Blrmi~ham. AL, ANES.
Daniel B. Lord - °'8.ndler Medical Center/Univ
of KY Med Ctr, Lexington. KY, J'NMO.
Thomas M. Lott - Medical Coll
of Georgia,
Augusta, GA, INM .
Kevin M. Ll.rlsford - Methodist Hospital , Memphis, TN, Stra .
Wagdan Maghan
- Carney Hospital. Boston,
MA , INMDP~. Massachusetts neral Hospital,
Boston, MA, PSYCH.
Holmes B. MMctman - Uriv of Louisville
School of Medicine. Louisville, KY, PHYSMOR.
Marian Martin - Uni of ArUnsas ror Med cal
dences, UWe Rock, AR. MEOPEDS.
William 0 . Martin - Medical Colle
of
Georgia, Auiusta. GA, TRANS.
Mark J . Mayson - Memorial Medi al Cent r.
Savannah, GA, INMD.
Daryl I. McOariel - Colwnbus Hospital ,
Chicago, 0.., TRANS, Mount Sainal/City lJniv,
ew Yort, NY, OPHrn.
LS. McGimis - Baptist Medical Centers, Birmlngbam. AL. TRANS.
Oarence R. McKemie - Cbatla Unit - Uriv TN
College of Medicine, Chltlanooga,TN, TRANS.
Kemon A. McLendon - Floyd Medical Center.
Rome, GA, F APC .
Alan P. McMahan - Memorial Medical Certer,
Savannah, GA, SURGPRE.
Antonio R. Mott - Univ of Cinclm ti Hospital,
Cincimat.i, OH, PEDS.
Cynthia L. Murphy - Medical University of
South Carolina., Cbariestoo., ~. PEDS.
David J. Najjar - Rlcblaod Memorial Hospital,
Colwnblal, SC, FAPC.
Robert B. Nickerson - O.rdler Medical
Ce!Ur/Univ of KY Med Ctr, Louisville, KY,
PHYSMOR.
Brent L. Nonis - Uriv of Maryland Medical
Systen, Baltimore, MD, SURGPRE.
FT'edrick L. O' Neal - Floyd Medical Cent.er, Los
A~eles, CA, INMD.
Gary S. Orris - North Carolina Baptist Hospital,
Winstoo-Salem, NC. ERMD.
Eduardo 0rtU - Cedars - Sina! Medical
Center, Los Angel , CA, J'NMO.
Spencer, M. Paterson - Medical Colle
ol
Georgia, Auglllla., GA, PSYCR
Keith N. PltWppi - Uoyd Nolmd Hoispital,
FaJrfleld, AL, TRANS. Duke Un!v Medical Certer
Ourbam,NC,ANES.
Glen L. Portwood - Uriv of Virginia, Charlottesville, VA, lNMD.
Flosrn C. ProdM - Georgia Baptist Medical
Center, AUanta, GA, SURGPRE.
Jerry N. Pn.rltt - Medical Colle ol Georgia.
Augusta, GA, TRANS.
Daniel C. Rabb - Univ of Cincinnati Hospital ,
Cincinnati, OH, INMDPRE.
Ralph S. Ramos - Univ of South Alabama
Medical Cel'Ur, Mottle, AJ , ANES.
Marc A. ftel.skiljd - Emory Unjv School or
Medicine. Atlanta, GA, TRANS, UMDNJ-New
Jersey Medical School, Newark, NJ , PHYSMDR.
AM M. Reynolds - Cttldrem Hospital allonal
Medical Certe.r , WaslUnJton. DC, PEDS.
Donna K. Rhoden - Medic CoU
ol Georgia
Augusta, GA, PEDS.
MAry S. RJchardson - Medical Colle e of
Georgia, Augusta, GA, PArn.
Marcus c. Roberts - Self Memorial Hospital
\NELCOME STUDENTS
p111m11111
~ RTFtQm
London
Brussels
Athens
Cairo
Madrid
Tel Aviv
........
$289
309
395
420
339
465
Some restnct1ons apply Taxes noc
Jnciuded Eurailpasses •ssued on the
spo(I FREE Student Tra...e Catalog
I
I
111111,
I
Daniel Village
I
Barber Shop
I
Monday-Saturday
I
I
9 a.m. - 6 p.m.
1 Daniel Village
I Style & Baber Shop
I w~~orRd.
736-7256
I
I
llllllHlll
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I'
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
: I
I
I
I I
I
1111111111111 II
11111111111
~
~
~~s~
TuesdaySaturday
9 a.m. - 6 p.m.
Daniel Village
Style & Baber Shop
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
Greenwood , • FAPC.
Jeffrey V. Rollim mory Univ
hoot of
Medicine, AUanta, GA , INMD.
Tim F. Ruark - Jacksonville H alth Ed
lion,
Jacksonville, FL. SURG.
avid L. Schaffner - Baylor ollege ct
Medjclne, Houston, TX. PATH.
Patricia D. Scherer - Medical College of
Georgia, Augusta, GA , FAPC.
Oeeane Sextoo - Univ ct Alabama H<Mlpital, Birmlngham , AL, PEOS.
James H. Shoptaw - Baylor College of
Medicine, Houstoo., TX, SU RGPRE.
Clyde L. Smith -· Boston City Hospital, Bolton,
MA, INMD.
avid C. Snyder - Georgia Baptist Medical
Center, Atlanta, GA, lNMD.
P trick A. Satris - Spartanb1rg Rqlonal
Medical Center, TRANS, Emory Uriversity School
of Medicloe, Atlanta, GA, ANE
ROlem&rle Spillane - Medicai University of
South Carolina, Charleston, ~. l'NMD, Duke Um
Medical Center, Durham, NC.
Lewis C. Stanley - Mecical College of Geol'gia.
Augusta, GA, INMO.
Chari
P. Steinbruegge - Resurrect.ion
Hospital, Chicago. rL, TRANS.
Jom G. Stevens - Medical Colle of Georgla,
Augu.sta, GA, ANF.S.
James A. Stevick - Metter Univ School of
Medicine , Macon, GA, SURG.
Eduardo J. Stincer - Medical College of
Geor a, Augusta, GA, RAIH>X .
Bruce E. Thomas - Naval Hospital, San Diego,
CA, SURG.
Robert M. Thornsberry - Chandler Medical
Cent.er/Univ of KY Med Ctr, Le~ton. KY, ORllfO.
Jeffery G. Tucker - Georgia Baptist Medical
Cent.er. Atlanta. GA . SURG.
Jon.n Jo'. 'l'umer - H~ Memorial Hospitals,
nolt • VA, TRANS.
uJ K. Tu.rry - Georgia Baptist Medical
Center, Atlanta, GA. TRANS, Umversity of Miami
School of Medicine, Milmi, F
Annie T. Vanaghese - Georgia Baptist Medical
R
Center, Atlanta, GA, INMD
Truman M. Vasko - Richland Memori
HOSPital. Columbia, • SURG.
Philip 0 . Veatch - Chandler Med cal
Center/Univ al KY Med Ctr, Lui ton, KY, lNMD.
Chistopber L. Vickery - Medical Colle of
Gecqia, AugUlta, GA, O'l'OLAR.
Wesley W. Walk.er - Greenville Hospital
System, Greenville,~. TRANS.
Ted W. Weathernid - Medical College of
Geol'gia, Augusta, GA, ANF.S.
Michael s. Weimtein - Emory umviersily
Sd:lool of Medicine, Atlanta. GA, ANES.
Donald R. Whaley - Lloyd Nol.Md ffo.tPt.al,
Fairfield, AL, TRANS. Umv al Alablma Meclcal
Center, Birtnqbmn, AL, OPffl'H.
George A . Wheeler - llemarial Meclcal CedA!r'.
Savannah, GA, FAPC.
Eftb'n W. wi.te eclcal College of Georgia.
Augmta. GA. OBGYN.
Oennia G. Williama - Talla.bulee emori al
Reginal Med Ctr, Tltllah•eee, FL, FAPC.
Racer S. Willia - Mercer U'9v School al
Medicine, Macon, GA, GAPC.
James P. WU.00 - Georgia e..ptilt Meclca.I
Center, Atlanta, GA. TRANS, lleclcal University
of Scab Carolina, Charlelton, SC, ANES.
David A. Woodard - Univ al FL Meclcal Cent«9*1dl Hospital. Glinenille, FL, INMD.
Cynthia P . Youmans - North Carolina
Memorial HOSJJH.al, Chapel Hill. NC, INMDPRE.
Ronald S. Y°'IOI - Geor0a e.ptilt Meclcal
C~.A.Uama.GA,SURGPRE .
lJ®<>
0
~~®©(!JJlb~ 0 a~
SEEKING DEDICATED STUDENTS TO SERVE
AS SECTION EDITORS
SALARIED POSITIONS AVAILABLE
PLEASE FILL OUT FORM BELOW AND
RETURN TO MCG BOX 1299
BY JUNE 2, 1989
NAME
PH#
MCG BOX._ __
SCHOOUYEAR
SECTION PREFERENCE._ _ __
PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE AND SKIL L S - - - - - -- - - - -
SUMMERADDRESS AND PHONE# _ __ _ _ __ _ _ _ __
Mexican Specialties
'Steak & Seafood
s1 so Margaritas
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday
(17 oz.)
5-7
p.m.
Open 5 p.m. Daily
2807 Wrightsboro Road • Daniel VIiiage • 733-7382
-
Page 8 -
Wednesday, May 31 , 1989, Medical College of GPOrgia
Make room at the top. Your school now
rGtnks with the worlds finest academic institutions in providing its community with the
mo t advanced learning tool in hi. tory:
Macintosh·persorntl computer~.
At Apple we·d like to thank you for making u·a part of your progres~ . Becau ·eyour
·chool has recentlyjoined our program. students, facultvand ·wff will now hm·e acces.)
to follyequij)ped computer labsand Apple
resource materials. As well as be eligible to
purchase Apple products at a special price.
Ifyou'd like more information on the
manyhenefi~ thi. partnership Im! to offer,
visit the location li:ted below
Together we'll unleash the bright l of
mi ml~. Ami make an even brighter fl.tture.
,
•
The power to he your best"
For further information and pricing. call the MCG Academic Computing
Department at 721-3720 or your authorized Apple Education Dealer.
Inacomp Computer Center . at 737-83 13.