You look familiar

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BLAB!
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Friday, May 30, 2008 3E
M
POP CULTURE WITHOUT THE CULTURE
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“I think it was a great
television moment. Whether
it was either of our best
moments, I don’t know.”
Matt Lauer, host of the Today show, on his
2005 on-air spat with Tom Cruise about
psychiatry
LATE-NIGHT JOKE OF THE WEEK
“Starbucks announced they’re going
to do away with their topless mermaid
logo. For what they charge for a cup
of coffee, it should be served by a
topless mermaid.”
Jay Leno, host of NBC’s Tonight Show With Jay Leno
GETTY IMAGES
CELEBRITY TERROR ALERT | THINGS WE SHOULD BE WORRIED ABOUT THIS WEEK
GREEN
BLUE
The Breakfast Club star Ally
Sheedy is divorcing her husband of 15 years. Irreconcilable
differences is the likely culprit,
and our money is on her serving
him one too many Cap’n Crunch
and Pixy Stix sandwiches for
dinner. (Are we the only ones
who memorized this movie?)
GOLD
When it comes to Detroit Red
Wings hockey player Chris
Osgood, actress Kristen Bell
says “Move over, Brad Pitt.”
When it comes to Kristen
Bell’s taste in men, Blab! says
“OK, now cover your left eye
and tell us what the second
line of letters reads?”
ORANGE
Indiana Jones star Harrison Ford is finally gonna
tie the knot with long-term
girlfriend Calista Flockhart. Blab! is guessing the
second she says “I do,” the
sickeningly svelte bride is
planning to eat the entire
wedding cake by herself.
AP/LOUIS LANZANO
Country singer Chris Cagle and his
girlfriend were both behind bars after a
night of heavy drinking turned into a
physical scrap when they got home.
Police said the woman hit Cagle with an
umbrella, prompting him to hit her with
a handbag. Expect it all to come out in
song when Cagle records Don’t Make
Me Angry or I’ll Hit You With My Purse.
CELEBRITY HEADS: TWO ARE BETTER THAN ONE
You look familiar
BLAB! RED
After actress Sharon Stone made
comments to the effect that the
earthquake in China was karma for
the country’s human rights violations,
the nation’s biggest cinema chains
responded by banning all her films.
Consider it karma for Basic Instinct 2
and Catwoman and The Muse and . . .
— Todd Camp
LILO’S LADY
LOVER?
Star look-alikes meet at the Reel Awards.
Can you tell who’s Reel and who’s real?
Last weekend, the Reel Awards, which honor the world’s top impersonators, took
place in Las Vegas. So we’ve taken a few of the attendees and paired them with
their real-life counterparts for a little quiz. See if you can guess which is which.
1. One of these women is Oprah Winfrey.
The other is not on a quest for world domination. Well, maybe she is. Anyway, who’s the real
Oprah?
The rumor mill is abuzz with reports that
Lindsay Lohan, right, and gal pal Samantha Ronson are more than just friends.
Which doesn’t explain why Samantha is
dressed as an extra from Cabaret.
BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM
KOOKY
FROM
CANNES
2. One of these guys is Dr. Phil
McGraw. We wouldn’t take advice
from the other one. Come to think of
it, we wouldn’t take advice from either
of them. Who’s the real Dr. Phil?
Milla Jovovich points to
something at
the Cannes
Film Festival.
We’re not sure
what. A hallucination, we’re
guessing.
3. One of these women is Whoopi
Goldberg. The other doesn’t have to
take daily headache medication, because she doesn’t co-host The View.
Who’s the real Whoopi?
NEWSCOM
5. One of these people is Robin Williams as Mrs. Doubtfire. The
other just likes to dress like this. Kidding! Which one is the real
Robin?
4. One of these duos is Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. We’re not even sure if the
other is a couple. If not, they probably have no problem getting dates. Who’s the real
Brangelina?
PHOTO SOURCES: 20TH CENTURY FOX, THE ASSOCIATED PRESS, GETTY IMAGES
BIG HEADS
OF THE WEEK
(ANSWERS: All of the celebrity impersonators are on the
left. 1. Oprah impersonator Caroline Hodge. 2. Dr. Phil
impersonator Dan Schneid. 3. Whoopi impersonator
Bernadottae Larson. 4. Brangelina impersonators Ryan
Fraley and Tatiana Turan. 5. Robin Williams impersonator
Alain Poudensan.)
CAREFUL, DON’T SPILL
The Onion
‘Wheel of Fortune’
contestants hit hard as
vowel prices skyrocket
The Satirical Political Report
Supreme Court stops
reruns of HBO’s ‘Recount’
The Onion
That guy from that one
show attempting
comeback
Actress Maggie Gyllenhaal and Ben & Jerry’s co-founder Jerry Greenfield host a “Bed-In for Peace.” We suggest a new Ben & Jerry’s flavor
made with ice cream, Jell-O and oatmeal: “Jellin’-haal & Oats.”
GETTY IMAGES/ANDREW H. WALKER
Having heard a
Basic Instinct
joke for the
4,785,323rd
time since 1992,
Sharon Stone
shows she’s a
good sport and
uses her fake
laugh.
GETTY IMAGES
HITTING THE LOWE NOTES
Rob Lowe
sings The
Battle Hymn
of the Republic with the
TSA Choir at
Los Angeles
International
Airport on
Memorial Day.
Uh, Rob? You
are aware that
that’s a fictional presidential campaign you’re
running on
Brothers &
Sisters, right?
BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM
Blab! is written by Todd Camp and Robert Philpot, designed by Cheryl King