Spokesmen USA Volume 2 Issue 10

Transcription

Spokesmen USA Volume 2 Issue 10
Don’t discard - Read - Then mail it to a friend
$24.00 PER YEAR
Mailed to you monthly
Call: (575) 551-1771
FREE - TAKE ONE
http://www.spokesmenusa.com
THE SPOKESMEN
September 2010
- [email protected]
Volume 2 Issue 10
Allah - God of 911
It really makes no difference to the argument, “All
Gods are the same God,” which God you choose. No
statement after that will appease the ‘True, and Living God.”
Argue all you wish, God will visit the death
angel on all who hold this view, first bringing
chaos into their lives, making them as though hell
were already their lot.
Folks, God has already made that judgement
on Americans because of their willingness to allow all Gods to dwell in their lands; therefore,
famine, earthquake, fire, flood, pestilence, plague,
war and rumours of wars and 911 have become
the rule of each day, rather than righteousness,
peace and joy. Listen to His word and be warned.
Deuteronomy 6
13Thou shalt fear the LORD thy God, and serve
him, and shalt swear by his name.
14Ye shall not go after other gods, of the gods of
the people which are round about you;
15(For the LORD thy God is a jealous God
among you) lest the anger of the LORD thy God be
kindled against thee, and destroy thee from off the
face of the earth.
16Ye shall not tempt the LORD your God, as ye
tempted him in Massah.
17Ye shall diligently keep the commandments of
the LORD your God, and his testimonies, and his statutes, which he hath commanded thee.
18And thou shalt do that which is right and good
in the sight of the LORD: that it may be well with
thee, and that thou mayest go in and possess the good
land which the LORD sware unto thy fathers.
19To cast out all thine enemies from before
thee, as the LORD hath spoken.
Does that sound as though God is pleased that
the ‘Allah worshiping Muslim is dominate in our
country. It simply isn’t so; and, that is why our nation
is crumbling and our economy is collapsing.
Continued on page 3
US
POSTAGE
$1.05
The Peoples Voice
THE USA BIKE IS BROKEN
My name is d’Lynn. I’m a
disabled Vietnam vet. I don’t
look too bad for a beat-up old
vet, do I? And that’s my ride.
She’s looking pretty good also,
especially when you consider
that she’ll turn twenty this summer. That’s right; it’s a 1990
with a 1990 sidecar. I can’t ride
a solo bike, ergo the sidecar rig.
It’s my sole means of transportation - rain or shine, snow or
wind, and this summer also
marks a milestone in both of our
lives, as I will finally be able to
pay her off. Twenty years old?
What? Why did it take so long?
You weren’t paying attention,
were you? It’s right at the beginning of this paragraph.
I am a disabled vet, which
means I receive a veteran’s administration disability pension,
which also means “I’m broke!” Just one step ahead of
being homeless every month, and that’s not an idle
statement or an “Oh, woe is me” dire complaint.
There’s a point to this, so hang in there a minute or
two and read on.
There’s a 25-year-old illegal immigrant woman
living in Florida , with eight kids. Yes, eight “anchor
babies” and she receives just shy of $1,500 per month
per kid, plus medical, plus food stamps.
Oh, wait. I’ve been informed that I shouldn’t call
them Food Stamps anymore. That’s not PC. It’s all
called “Social Assistance” now. You do the math on
that yourself. I’d say that she was schooled early in
how to make it in the system. Twenty-five years old,
eight kids . . . . . yep, she started early.
You can whip out the calculator if you want, but
this woman, who never has paid a dime in taxes of any
SPOKESMEN USA
NOW AVAILABLE BY MAIL
kind, (and still doesn’t – she’s ‘illegal,’ remember?) is
here in this country illegally. She hasn’t paid out one
cent in medical for all the “anchor babies,” makes more
in one month, legally, than I receive in over a year and
a half in disability payments and I can’t even get food
stamps! Oops, I mean “Social Assistance.”
Technically I am eligible for “Social Assistance.”
I was told it would be a walk through – a gimme being
disabled. No problem, and in the very next breath I
was also informed that under the law the amount I
received in “Social Assistance” would be deducted
from my disability pension.
Let’s say I take a great photograph. It was just
luck, a one of a kind accident, in the right place at the
right time shot. My local newspaper offers me fifty
bucks to use the photo in a featured story. (I live in a
Continued on page 3
Get Spokesmen USA delivered to your door the first week of each month
SPOKESMEN USA
ON LINE FREE
JUST $24.00 PER YEAR
Get It Now for The Remainder of 2010
[email protected]
771
551-1
)
5
7
(5
For Just $6.00
71
51-17
5
)
5
(57
Tell your family and friends everywhere - Spokesmen USA now reaches all 50 states
ORDER YOURS - TODAY - [email protected]
Spokesmen USA - PO Box 1 - Alamogordo, NM 88311
CONTACT:
Ask to receive the Spokesmen USA
by email and make sure you include
your correct email address.
BE SURE TO FORWARD IT TO ALL OF
YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY
THE SPOKESMEN
2
MEMORIES
of
Bettie Dossett
“TRAIL NOTES”
When I was on Grand Canyon’s
North Rim, so many years ago you
wouldn’t believe it if I told you , but, at
that time, Transept Trail ran the full mile
between the Camp Center and Grand
Canyon Lodge.
This foot trail provided a self-guided Nature Hike and was, I thought,
worth anyone’s time, any hour of the
day from early morning until late
evening. It was an enchanting experience; a feeling of alone-ness with Nature; an escape, however brief one
might make it, from the clamor of the
world.
Trees, shrubs, wild flowers and tall
lush grasses grew along this Trail and
profusely covered the North Rim. One
was likely to see a squirrel scurry up a
tree, a chipmunk run or a colorful horn
toad hurry away.
It wasn’t unusual to see a deer or
two - perhaps a doe with her spotted
fawn at her side.
The Canyon is beautiful from any
view point along that North Rim. Surely
the Trail is still there but with the rapid
pace at which change is occurring, who
can guess; but the “self-guided nature
hike” meant that there were placards,
in appropriate places, offering botanical information, bits of philosophy, history and poetry.
At one particular place a partially
exposed row of stones suggested unexcavated Indian ruins and at another,
one could look down to a white stone
ledge and see ancient crumbling cliff
dwellings.
The Trail offered the beauty of rustic bridges; cool, moist, shadowy hollows and warm, bright, sunny hilltops.
At the crest of one such rise there was
a large hewn-log bench situated so that
it was in partial or full shade, inviting
one to rest and enjoy a cool breeze.
Seated there, one could look out into
vast depths, distances and realms of
color. Seeming to be right on the very
The Peoples Voice
NEWT TELLS IT LIKE IT IS
Newt Gingrich, July 21, 2010 6pm
There should be no mosque near Ground Zero in New York so long as there
are no churches or synagogues in Saudi Arabia. The time for double standards that
allow Islamists to behave aggressively toward uswhile they demand our weakness
and submission is over.
The proposed “Cordoba House” overlooking the World Trade Center site –
where a group of jihadists killed over 3000 Americans and destroyedone of our
most famous landmarks - is a test of the timidity, passivity and historic ignorance
of American elites.
For example,most of them don’t understand that “Cordoba House” is a deliberately insulting term. It refers to Cordoba , Spain – the capital of Muslim conquerors who symbolized their victory over the Christian Spaniards by transforming a church there into the world’s third-largest mosquecomplex.
Today, some of the Mosque’s backers insist this term is being used to”symbolize
interfaith cooperation” when, in fact, every Islamist in the world recognizes Cordoba as a symbol of Islamic conquest. It is a sign of their contempt for Americans
and their confidence in our historic ignorance that they would deliberately insult
us this way.
You can read about the history of the meaning of Cordoba at http://
www.andalucia.com/cities/cordoba/mosque2.htm
Those Islamists and their apologists who argue for “religious toleration” are
arrogantly dishonest. They ignore the fact that more than 100 mosques already
exist in New York City . Meanwhile, there are no churches or synagogues in all of
Saudi Arabia .
In fact no Christian or Jew can even enter Mecca . And they lecture us about
tolerance.If the people behind the Cordoba House were serious about religious
toleration, they would be imploring the Saudis, as fellow Muslims, to immediately
open up Mecca to all and immediately announce their intention to allow nonMuslim houses of worship in the Kingdom.
They should be asked by the news media if they would be willing to lead such
a campaign.We have not been able to rebuild the World Trade Center in nine years.
Now we are being told a 13 story, $100 million megamosque will bebuilt within a
year overlooking the site of the most devastating surprise attack in American history.
Finally where is the money coming from? The people behind the CordobaHouse refuse to reveal all their funding sources.America is experiencing an Islamist cultural-political offensive designed to undermine and destroy our civilization.
Sadly, too many ofour elites are the willing apologists for those who would
destroy themi f they could.
No mosque.No self deception.No surrender.
The time to take a stand is now - at this site on this issue. Why can’t we have
a President as intelligent, educated,and patriotic as this former Speaker of the House?
edge were two huge pine trees, making
an excellent frame for photographs of
the Canyon from that point.
Everything along that Trail is interesting but a favorite spot of mine was
where a placard titled “The Eleventh
Commandment” was posted; written by
Doctor Walter C. Lowdermilk, it reads
as follows:
“Thou shalt inherit the holy earth
as a faithful steward, conserving its resources and productivity from generation to generation. Thou shalt safeguard thy fields from soil erosion, thy
living waters from drying up, thy forests from desolation, and protect thy
hills from over-grazing by thy herds, that
thy descendants may have abundance
forever.
If any shall fail in this stewardship
of the land thy fruitful fields shall become sterile stony ground and wasting
gullies, and thy descendants shall decrease and live in poverty or perish from
off the face of the earth.”
-Dr. Walter C. Lowdermilk
NOTE: Dr. Lowdermilk died in the
early ‘60’s but I had written to him for
his permission to publish this in a periodical.
He was a consultant in Soil Conservation with the Food and Agriculture
Organization of the United Nations. My
letter, so many years ago, reached him
EDITOR’S COMMENT: Because the Muslims in our ranks voted
in Jerusalem, from where he mailed his
prompt reply.
for Obama instead of Newt!
“Certainly you may publish the
REPUBLICAN PARTY - OCTOBER AGENDA
“filler” including the Eleventh Com- 2 Meet the candidates in Pinon Dinner & Auction Pinon Community Center
mandment. It is my hope that this state- 6:30pm
ment may inspire more of our people in 2 RWOOC Wine & Cheese 6 pm Eagle Ranch
America and elsewhere to safeguard the 5. Last Day to Register to Vote/Absentee Voting Begins
holy earth, the soil and rains that fall 6 RWOOC (Republican Women) Guest Speaker: 11:30am Golf Course
on it, and to bring storm waters under 7 Cowbelle’s Candidate Forum Fairgrounds Exhibition Hall 11:30am Potluck
control for conservation and use, and Lunch
if, in excess of that, to pass them along 7 RPOC Monthly Evening Meeting Guest Speaker: Rep. Nora Espinoza,
in improved drainage ways and chan- Dist.59 6:30pm Pepper’s Grill Ben Hall, PRC candidate Dist. 5
nels, harmlessly to the sea.
16 Early In-Person Voting Begins
The North Rim.....is an inspiring 19 RPOC Monthly Lunch Meeting Guest Speaker: Donald Yee 11:30am
place.”
Pepper’s Grill Candidate for County Assessor
Publisher/Editor, Charles W. Bush, 575-551-1771
P.O. Box 1, Alamogordo, NM 88311
Disclaimer
Items in The Spokesmen are contributed by various independent and
unpaid correspondents. Each is required to accept responsibility for
the content they submit. Although all articles are screened by the
editor for any content that is openly contrary to proper moral ethic, it
is not judged for it’s political bias or Scriptural interpretation.
These articles do not necessarily reflect the viewpoint and opinion of
the publisher, editor, or other correspondents. It is the opinion of this
publication that out of a variety of viewpoints and presentations by many different
authors on any given subject, the. . . . . . .
. . . . .
“TRUTH WILL SHINE FORTH LIKE A BRIGHT LIGHT”.
You are openly invited
to offer your viewpoints, criticisms
and inspirations for possible
inclusion in future publications of
The Spokesmen and become
another . . . . . .
SPOKESMEN
Such offerings may be e-mailed to
[email protected].
Due to limited staff, ALL articles
must be presented by email
Articles should be under 600 words
Pictures should be clearly labled.
EMAIL THE
SPOKESMEN
TO A FRIEND
IT COSTS NOTHING
IT TAKES NO TIME
IT IS THE THING TO DO
SEND THEIR EMAIL
ADDRESS TO:
[email protected]
Better Yet, why not email it
yourself? Get it - Forward it.
THE SPOKESMEN
3
Continued from page 1 - USA Bike
small town and fifty bucks is all they could afford.) I
have to report that fifty dollars to the VA as earned
income, which will immediately be deducted from
my next month’s disability check. If I don’t report
it I’m in violation of federal law and technically
they can stop my disability pension and prosecute
me under a federal felony. Pretty cool, eh, for fifty
bucks?
I see no point in dealing with two federal bureaucracies, so I don’t bother. What’s the point?
She’s here illegally and with just one kid would
make over twice what I receive per month. She has
eight and she’s not a stand-out case. She’s not alone.
That’s the way the system works. Millions of illegal
immigrants know this, know how the system works
and know how to use it. (Haven’t you seen the pamphlet? It’s handed out all along our borders, “The Illegal Immigrants’ Guide to Keeping America Just the
Way It Is.”) and that’s just the way it works.
Did you know that the federal government provides a “refugee” in this country with a monthly “stipend” of $1,890, plus $580 a month in “Social Assistance?” That’s $2,470 a month, tax-free. That’s two
and a half times what I’m allowed to receive as a
disabled vet. And just what did they do to earn this?
All you have to do is show up on our collective doorstep, raise your right hand and swear that you’re a
refugee and, bingo, receive $30,000 a year, tax-free.
That’s more than someone making $15 an hour, and
they have to pay taxes to boot!
Now, in defense of the Veterans Administration,
they are doing what they can with what they’ve got.
This is precious little compared to what they should
have to get the job done. At least this country has a
VA.
It’s the Senate that keeps passing laws, rules and
guidelines, cutting their budget, denying requests for
more staff and computer systems to handle the massive work flow. Their hands are tied by the very government that’s supposed to give them what they need
to get the job done, by the government you voted into
office.
Don’t scream at the VA.
I have. It’s misguided anger.
I CREATED THE
INTERNET
The point to this “story,” just why are you paying
such high taxes to support this incredibly screwed-up
government? Why? And I’m not proposing you stop
paying your taxes. That’s wrong. There are good programs and reasons to pay your taxes and support our
government.
What am I proposing? It’s quite simple. Vote!!!
The government, our government, is broken and
we as the voters serve as the maintenance crew. We
fix it . . . . . by voting. If your state Senator has been in
office more than two terms, vote ‘them out at the next
election. If your state representative has been in office
more than two terms, vote ‘them out of office. We put
term limits on just about every publicly-elected official in the country except the House and Senate.
Why? Believe me, they know this and love it!
Ahhh - the power!
I don’t care how much you believe, you’re Senator or Representative is doing a good job. They’re not!
Look at the government you have....that we have. How
can you state they are doing what you want as the voter that put them there? How?
Vote them out of office. Do it.
Change the course of this country’s history by what
you are granted and guaranteed under the law. Vote!
And if you have the guts, the anger, the outrage, start a
petition in your state for a state-wide initiative to be
placed on your next state ballot. Limiting the terms
of office for your state senators and state representatives to your federal government to two terms
The federal government will never pass such a law,
but you can. You can get it done. You can force it. You
can make it a law.
This is the first step in “getting it right.” Just vote.
It’s simple. It’s easy, damn it! This first step will send
a very clear message. It’ll work. It’ will put “us” back
in control of “them.” As it should be, as it was intended in the first place.
Are you an American?
Born and raised?
Then vote!!!
I CREATED
650,000 JOBS
The Peoples Voice
From Page 1 Allah
God has spoken! It is happening before your eyes.
It is time to wake up! It is time to cast out the enemy
that worships false Gods. Our nation is Christian, but
not for long.
Do you really think that the Muslims will allow
you to continue to worship Jesus Christ, once they
are in actual, admitted, ‘visible’ control?
Just since Obama (just one Muslim) took office there are no prayers offered from the dais or
in the congressional chamber. Only moments of
silence, during which the silent hope they can finish picking their nose while the silence lasts and
not be caught with their finger up it.
Additionally, major journalists are being
called racist simply because they disagree with a
Muslim president or an NAACP official.
Do you really feel that we still live in the ‘land
of the free’; or, do you feel captive, confused and
oppressed?
Is Arizona’s being forbidden to protect their
borders from open invasion by armed drug lords,
thugs and illegals truly an expression of American freedom?
Obama is ready to sign into law a bill which
will reduce social security benefits for all above
age 70. Does this sound like America really cares
for those who made it great?
Are you happy with the three or four new disasters occurring every day; disastors that kill a
few, up to hundreds or even thousands?
Is aids, tuberculosis, salmonilla, lead poisoning, oil spill contaminated seafood, etc., etc. a
product of incidental everyday life?
NO! These are but a few of the effects of fellowshipping those who embrace false gods and
entertaining those false gods within our land.
“Freedom of religion,” you shout. What has
it gotten you. It seemed a righteous thing to do;
that is, until God ceased from patience and long
suffering and turned satan loose. Loose on who?
Loose on America. America who knew better.
America, the Christian nation. America, worshippers of the true and living God.
We should have constituted a Government
free of religion. We should have constituted a
‘Christian’ people, without defining the term,
‘Christian” in our legal journals.
We should have made it clear that those who
were to dwell among us were to forsake all other
God’s and accept Jesus Christ as Lord of all.
Well, it is too late now. The damage is done.
GOD IS ANGRY AND HIS WRATH AT HAND!
Gore
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
WHO IS THE BIGGEST LAUGHING STOCK?
Just look around you. If the fires, earthquakes,
volcanic eruptions, landslides, floods,
pestilences,diseases, poisonings, tornadoes, wars
hurricanes, terrorists, economy collapses,
droughts, climate changes, famines and on and
on, are not sufficient to convince you . . . . .
THEN LET THE ALLAH WORSHIPING
MUSLIMS remain among us. Then, you ain’t
seen nothi’n yet!
“How do we rid ourselves of them,” you ask?
We get rid of their president, first. Then,
we deport them any way we can.
Then we fight - At least Armegeddon will
have a valid reason for happening, won’t it.?
Yes, this paper is anti-muslim. Now you know
the reason why. - Editor, Wes Bush
THE SPOKESMEN
LIFE OWES YOU NOTHING
Love him or hate him , he sure hits
the nail on the head with this! Bill Gates
recently gave a speech at a High School
about 11 things they did not and will not
learn in school. He talks about how feelgood, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set
them up for failure in the real world.
Rule 1 : Life is not fair - get used to
it!
Rule 2 : The world doesn’t care
about your self-esteem. The world will
expect you to accomplish something
BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
Rule 3 : You will NOT make
$60,000 a year right out of high school.
You won’t be a vice-president with a car
phone until you earn both.
Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is
tough, wait till you get a boss
Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents
4
had a different word for
burger flipping: they called
it opportunity.
Rule 6 : If you mess
up, it’s not your parents’
fault , so don’t whine about
your mistakes, learn from
them.
Rule 7 : Before you
were born, your parents
weren’t as boring as they
are now. They got that way
from paying your bills,
cleaning your clothes and
listening to you talk about
how cool you thought you
were. So before you save
the rain forest from the parasites of your
parent’s generation, try delousing the
closet in your own room.
Rule 8 : Your school may have done
away with winners and losers, but life
HAS NOT. In some schools, they have
abolished failing grades and they’ll give
you as MANY TIMES as you want to
get the right answer. This doesn’t bear
the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and
very few employers are interested in
helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that
on your own time.
Rule 10 : Television is NOT real
life. In real life people actually have to
leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.
If you can read this -Thank a
teacher!
If you can read this in
English thank a soldier!!!
The line that grabbed me (in English (thank you soldiers
was, “The chances are you will wind up working for me.”
With his wealth, I would be surprised if we are not already. - Editor
From: Eric Covos [mailto:[email protected]]
Sent: Monday, September 06, 2010 2:04 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Letter to Editor
The Peoples Voice
Intimidated with thought of approaching God?
Lifescope says, “You can be delivered from fear!”
Now, when sins have once been forever forgiven and forgotten, there is no
need to offer more sacrifices to get rid of them. And so, dear brothers, now we
may walk right into the very Holy of Holies where God is, because of the blood
of Jesus.
This is the fresh, new, life-giving way which Christ has opened up for us by
tearing the curtain - His human body - to let us into the holy presence of God. So
let us come boldly to the very throne of God and stay there to receive His mercy
and to find grace to help us in our times of need. Wait for the Lord’s help. Be
strong and brave and wait for the Lord’s help. Yes, be bold and strong! Banish
fear and doubt! For remember, the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.
The wicked flee when no one is chasing them! But the godly are bold as lions!
Through Christ, God made peace between us and Himself. And God gave us
the work of bringing everyone into peace with Him. I mean that God was in
Christ, making peace between the world and Himself. In Christ, God did not hold
the world guilty of its sins. And He gave us this message of peace.
Therefore we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through
us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God. For He made Him
Who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God
in Him.
I want to remind you to stir into flame the strength and boldness that is in
you, that entered into you when I laid my hands upon your head and blessed you.
For the Holy Spirit, God’s gift, does not want you to be afraid of people, but to be
wise and strong, and to love them and enjoy being with them. If you will stir up
this inner power, you will never be afraid to tell others about our Lord . . .
[When the believers were being persecuted, the apostles prayed for boldness:] “. . . and now, O Lord, hear their threats, and grant to your servants great
boldness in their preaching, and send Your healing power, and may miracles and
wonders be done by the name of Your holy Servant Jesus.” After this prayer, the
building where they were meeting shook and they were all filled with the Holy
Spirit and boldly preached God’s message.
Taken from Heb. 10, 4, Ps. 27, Josh. 1, Pr. 28, II Cor. 5, II Tim. 1, Acts 4,
The Living Bible, The Everyday Bible and The New King James. For free Lifescope book,
write to Box 1575, Carlsbad, NM 88221. Please send $1.00 for postage and handling.
Please email your
opinion and comments to
The Spokesmen.
[email protected]
Editor,
I recently “read” a copy of your paper and was appalled by the despicable
grammar. If you truly love the USA, you should become fluent in her language unless, of course, you think we should speak something other than English... Eric
Covos, Mexican immigrant
Dear Eric
Thank you for your suggestion. I will print it so everyone can be made aware
that you are so fluent that you should be accepted without discrimination because
of language.
For your information, I write very few words in the Spokesmen. Most of the
articles are submitted by folks like you; however, I was voted by my 12th grade
English Literature teacher to be the child LEAST likely to write anything worthwhile that she had known during the 60 years she had taught.
Perhaps you and she agree. - Wes Bush, editor
Dear Spokesmen USA,
Our sister and brother-in-law, Mac & Wanda McCaslin, live in Alamogordo and have been sending your paper to us. We love it, read it all and pass it on.
Now we are able to get it ourselves and are tickled to do so. Thank you
so much and God bless you. - Duane & Joy Wickard
Eat a live toad in the morning and
nothing worse will happen to you
for the rest of the day.
Never put both feet in your mouth at
the same time, because then you don’t
have a leg to stand on.
INVITING YOU TO JOIN US
IN PRAISE AND ADORATION OF OUR LORD
THE GATHERING PLACE
1601 Hawaii
Alamogordo, NM 88310
(575) 551-1771
Alamogordo’s Place Of Open Worship
Come and share your heart with us.
Everyone welcome at the microphone.
Gathering each Sunday at 9:00 AM
Wes Bush, Don Hoffman, Billy Dales, Charles Lackey, Willie, Linda Dixon,
Sandy Y’Barra, Joe & Karen Green, Louis Branch co-workers together
Apostles, Prophets, Evangelists,
Pastors and Teachers are welcome.
THE SPOKESMEN
5
Editorial Comment:
Many of you have religious beliefs that fault
such practices as Yoga and Tai Chi. For that reason I
fully expect to hear from some of you concerning the
adjoining article.
With that in mind I thought I should take advantage of the opportunity to request that you do something truly constructive. You see, it is one thing to criticize; it is another altogether, to instruct.
Pray, and seek God’s mind concerning these
and perhaps He will use you to give some instruction
from His word.
That is the kind of letter we are seeking from
you. The ‘Truth’ will set us free. It is when we seek the
mind of God that we come to the knowledge of the
truth.
For instance, were an Indian in some village
so remote from missions that he had never heard the
name of Jesus and had never had his faith in ‘The Great
White Father’ challenged, to do a ‘rain dance’, would
God hear his sincere prayer and grant him rain?
Such an interesting question demands more
than some glib, religious popycock for an answer.
One of the things the Spokesmen seeks is the
truth. Please give Yoga and Tai Chi a few moments of
your time. Perhaps God would use you to enlighten us
as to the benefits or detriments (if any) of either or
both of them.
God said in His written Word, “Call upon me
and I WILL ANSWER.”
I am asking you to call upon God. Listen to
His answer and share His answer with a reading audience of more than 10,000.people who read the Spokesmen and many tens of thousands who get it through
the internet via email - Editor
The Peoples Voice
How to
Decrease Stress
through Tai Chi & Yoga
SUSAN M. POORE, RN, CNC, CPLC
When we are stressed our bodies undergo a
series of hormonal and biochemical changes.
Chronic stress can put us in the “fight or flight”
mode, which in turn increases our heart rate,
while many body systems slow way down and do
not function at their best. No one can avoid all
stress, but we can return our bodies to a “homeostasis” state of balance through a variety of
ways, including relaxation, exercise, deep breathing, meditation, Tai Chi and Yoga. Through that
state of balance our bodies may allow any physical or emotional challenges to improve. Therefore incorporating one of these types of stress
reducing exercises can impact your overall
health.
The Eastern practices of Tai Chi and Yoga
are effective stress-reducing exercises that can be
incorporated into your daily life.
Tai Chi is a self-paced, non-competitive series of slow, gentle, flowing body movements. It
was initially taught as a martial art during the 13th
century, however, today it is practiced to condition
the body, calm the mind and reduce stress. Tai Chi
instructors will teach you to focus on your breathing and staying in the moment much like meditation. Tai Chi is low impact, so those having issues
with joints do rather well. It is generally safe for
people at any level of fitness. It can improve your
9TH AND Delaware Ave.
Alamogordo, NM 88310
(575) 491-5036
balance and decrease the risk of falling. Other
benefits range from slowing bone loss and helping
relieve chronic pain.
Yoga brings together your physical, mental
and spiritual beliefs with the goal of reaching a
state of wholeness and peace. Yoga is a Sanskrit
word meaning “to unite. There are many forms of
yoga depending on the instructors training and your
preference. Yoga teaches you a series of poses as
well as concentration techniques. The classes vary
from beginners to advanced yoga techniques. The
variety of poses are designed to balance your body,
slow down your systems that are stressed and help
you find peace. Attending a yoga studio or finding a private instructor will help you learn the position and breathing techniques.
Tai Chi & Yoga are taught at The Self Improvement 101 Mind & Body Center (a division
of Balanced Health 101) located at 311 9th St.
Located across the street from the old Inkwell Printers. You can read more about the classes and how
to reach the instructors by going to:
www.BalancedHealth101.com
or calling (575) 491-5036
Susan is a Registered Nurse, Certified in Nutrition, Stress Management & is a Professional Life
Coach. Her practice Balanced Health 101 is located at 901 Delaware here in Alamogordo.
LEGACY
CHRISTIAN
SHAFFER’S CUSTOM FURNITURE
Grades K-4 Through 12
‘Over 40 years experience’
Free estimates.
IT’S TIME TO APPLY
Christian curricula aligned with New Mexico
Standards and Benchmarks, small class sizes and
before/after school day care for K-4 through 4th grade.
Get your registration packet before it is too late.
Legacy Christian Academy
Disciple Hall, 2nd Floor, Room 207
1206 Greenwood Lane
Alamogordo, NM 88310
http://www.legacychristianacademy-edu.com
“Making Learning Exciting Through Expectation Of Success!”
TEA
PARTY
PATRIOTS
TAKE A LOOK AT OUR SIGN!
LOOK FOR IT WEST OF TOWN
THE SIGN READS:
SAVE THE CONSTITUTION
KEEP THE TEA
DUMP THE CONGRESS
Those interested call: Don Omey - (575) 487-2795
2107 1/2 Cornell Ave
Alamogordo, NM 88310
575-434-2722
[email protected]
Specializing in custom kitchens, bathrooms, countertops,
and custom furniture. Certified Solid Surface Fabricator.
ORDER THE SPOKESMEN
IN BUNDLES OF 100
Just $20.00 per bundle including shipping
A GREAT WAY TO HELP AMERICA
“WAKE UP!”
Order a bundle for your
Church
Business
Civic Club
AND Friends
[email protected]
Spokesmen Newspaper
PO Box 1
Alamogordo, NM 88310
(575) 551-1771
THE SPOKESMEN
Dear Editor:
6
Your Thoughts, Please
In the August issue of The Spokesmen, you stated your desire to “eradicate” gay people, and in a subsequent email message to me, you explained that
God has instructed you to do that in the
Bible. I must say that I disagree with you,
and I hope you will reconsider your position for the following reasons:
· First, the Old Testament condones or commands us to do many things
that are obviously immoral or depraved,
including genocide (Deuteronomy 20),
the rape or killing of innocent women
(Numbers 16 and 31), the killing of innocent children (Numbers 16 and 31)
and the killing of anyone who doesn’t
accept the Judeo-Christian God (2
Chronicles 15). Obviously, the fact that
the Bible says we should do these things
doesn’t necessarily mean we should; instead, we need to ask ourselves whether
such commands truly represent God’s
just and loving nature. In my opinion,
the mass killing of gay people clearly
does not.
· You stated that your position is
justified because gay men engage in
both oral and anal sex, which you find
repulsive. This attitude reduces homosexuality to nothing more than sexual
acts and disregards the intimacy, love
and affection that committed gay couples share. It also ignores the fact that a
significant number of heterosexuals
(both men and women) engage in those
very same activities. If you kill gay men
for what they do, you will have to kill
many heterosexuals as well. Are you
sure you want to do that?
· Scientific research (along with
the testimony of gay people) increasingly demonstrates that being homosexual
is not a choice and that gay men and lesbians can no more determine their sexual orientation than heterosexuals. Also,
we know that nature consistently accepts
homosexual behavior, since it has been
Dear Doug,
I do, without reservation. desire that
all homosexual behavior be eradicated
from our land. The reason is simple and
must be considered from the viewpoint
of what God has said; not from the ramblings of the carnal mind, which you
have obviously used to rationalize that
all such activities are now permissable.
It behoves me to ask you a few questions right up front.
1. Do you believe in a soveriegn
God?
2. Do you believe that He changed
His mind between the Old Testament
and the New?
3. If He did, then is it alright for me
to rape your wife or to murder you. After all, “Thou shalt not kill” is Old Testament law, not New Testament grace.
Or. perhaps we should keep a few
of the Old Testament commandments
and do away with some of the others.
By the way, Doug, were you to have
a wife, and I chose to rape her, would
you see that as permissable under the
New Covenant? I think not, since you
have obviously disdained the rules of
our God, who said, (Deuteronomy 20)
“10 When thou comest nigh unto a
city to fight against it, then proclaim
peace unto it.
11And it shall be, if it make thee
answer of peace, and open unto thee,
then it shall be, that all the people that
is found therein shall be tributaries unto
thee, and they shall serve thee.
12And if it will make no peace with
thee, but will make war against thee,
then thou shalt besiege it:
13And when the LORD thy God
hath delivered it into thine hands, thou
shalt smite every male thereof with the
edge of the sword:
14But the women, and the little
ones, and the cattle, and all that is in
the city, even all the spoil thereof, shalt
thou take unto thyself; and thou shalt
eat the spoil of thine enemies, which the
LORD thy God hath given thee.
15Thus shalt thou do unto all the
cities which are very far off from thee,
which are not of the cities of these nations.
Doug, God did not order that the
women be ravaged. Without husbands
they were now free to marry again, and
their children free to be adopted. And
He said that they should use the ‘spoil’,
the cattle and all that was in the city.
28And Moses said, Hereby ye shall
know that the LORD hath sent me to do
all these works; for I have not done them
of mine own mind.
29If these men die the common
death of all men, or if they be visited
after the visitation of all men; then the
LORD hath not sent me.
30But if the LORD make a new
thing, and the earth open her mouth, and
swallow them up, with all that appertain unto them, and they go down quick
into the pit; then ye shall understand that
these men have provoked the LORD.
31And it came to pass, as he had
made an end of speaking all these words,
that the ground clave asunder that was
under them:
32And the earth opened her mouth,
and swallowed them up, and their houses, and all the men that appertained unto
Korah, and all their goods.
33They, and all that appertained to
them, went down alive into the pit, and
the earth closed upon them: and they
perished from among the congregation.
34And all Israel that were round
about them fled at the cry of them: for
they said, Lest the earth swallow us up
also.
35And there came out a fire from
the LORD, and consumed the two hundred and fifty men that offered incense.
As for me and my house, I will
choose to avoid any thing that pertains
to, resembles or otherwise has anything
The Peoples Voice
documented in hundreds of non-human
species throughout the world (check it
out on the internet). For these reasons,
it is incorrect to believe that having a
homosexual orientation is unnatural,
abnormal or an “abomination” in God’s
eyes.
· Since gay men and lesbians are
human beings as well as citizens of our
country, they have the same rights to life,
liberty and the pursuit of happiness that
everyone else has. They are entitled to
live their lives as they see fit, just like
heterosexuals, without being harassed or
punished for it, and certainly without
being killed.
In my opinion, wanting to eradicate
other people because they don’t adhere
to our religious views or otherwise are
different from us, or thinking that God
wants us to eradicate them, is absolutely wrong. It’s a sure indication that we
have lost our moral compass and that
we need to stop and reconsider our beliefs. I hope very much that you will do
that. Sincerely, Doug
to do with homosexuality, lesbianism or
beastiality. I certainly don’t want to
suffer the consequences deliniated in
the foregoing scripture; nor do I want
to see our country suffer such.
As to the fact that some hetrosexuals also engage in oral and anal sex, you
are right. Those who indulge either premarital sex, or ‘marital fornication’ (sex
born of lust rather than love) are often
guilty of the same sins that gays are
guilty of; but, does that make it right?
They, too, shall suffer the wrath of
God’s judgement.
9Know ye not that the unrighteous
shall not inherit the kingdom of God?
Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor
idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate,
nor abusers of themselves with mankind,
10Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor
drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God
Doug, when I was a child, the law
of our land would have punished all gays
for the practices that you have admitted
they indulge.
That I find these practices repulsive
should not be a surprise . . . . .
They are ‘UNCLEAN.’!
It is futile to belabour the point.
Either you believe God’s Word (as
it is written) or you don’t. In the instance
of the scriptures I have cited, even a six
year old child, (in innocence) can easily determine the course of action God
intended.
I fear that is not so with those who,
in their burning lust, choose to indulge
the gay life style.
Yes, it is a choice.
One born with a deformity can
choose to live a complete life of independance. Many have done it; but, a
multitude have made the wrong, miserable choice to live dependant on society, never enjoying the exhileration of
true freedom & success.
Didn’t Jesus agree
that some were
born homosexual.
You can see his thoughts on the
matter if you read Matthew 19:8-12.
8He saith unto them, Moses because
of the hardness of your hearts suffered
you to put away your wives: but from
the beginning it was not so.
9And I say unto you, Whosoever
shall put away his wife, except it be for
fornication, and shall marry another,
committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit
adultery.
10His disciples say unto him, If the
case of the man be so with his wife, it is
not good to marry.
11But he said unto them, All men
cannot receive this saying, save they to
whom it is given.
12For there are some eunuchs,
which were so born from their mother’s
womb: and there are some eunuchs,
which were made eunuchs of men: and
there be eunuchs, which have made
themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of
heaven’s sake. He that is able to receive
it, let him receive it.
If you know the history of the words
saris or eunouchos you would know
this. After explaining to his audience that
marriage was a lifetime commitment
between a man and a woman (Matthew
19:4-6) and that it could not be easily
ended (Matthew 19:9),
“His disciples said to Him, “If such
is the case of the man with his wife, it is
better not to marry.”
But He said to them, “All cannot
accept this saying, but only those to
whom it has been given: For there are
eunuchs who were born thus from their
mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs
who were made eunuchs by men, and
there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He who is able to accept it,
let him accept it” (Matthew 19:10-12).
In classical Greek, eunouchos
(translated “eunuch”) referred to men
who were placed in charge of women.
The position normally required that the
man be castrated so that he could not
have sexual relations with his master’s
women.
The same word was also used for
castrated animals. When the Septuagint
translation of the Hebrew Scriptures was
done. eunouchos was used to translate
the Hebrew word saris. This word referred to a court officials or eunuchs. In
ancient culture this was often one and
the same.
A eunuch provided little threat to the
ruling family because they were physically unable to establish their own dynasty, nor could one of the queens find
herself having a son of a servant.
Eunuchs were not allowed to serve
as priests for Israel, since they were not
whole.
Continued on page 7
THE SPOKESMEN
7
The Peoples Voice
Continued from page 6 (Homosexuality)
“Speak to Aaron, saying: ‘No man of your descendants in succeeding generations, who has any defect,
may approach to offer the bread of his God. For any
man who has a defect shall not approach: a man blind
or lame, who has a marred face or any limb too long,
a man who has a broken foot or broken hand, ‘or is a
hunchback or a dwarf, or a man who has a defect in
his eye, or eczema or scab, or is a eunuch. No man of
the descendants of Aaron the priest, who has a defect,
shall come near to offer the offerings made by fire to
the LORD. He has a defect; he shall not come near to
offer the bread of his God’” (Leviticus 21:17-21).
Nor were eunuchs allowed to enter the congregation of Israel. “He who is emasculated by crushing or
mutilation shall not enter the assembly of the LORD.
One of illegitimate birth shall not enter the assembly
of the LORD; even to the tenth generation none of his
descendants shall enter the assembly of the LORD.
An Ammonite or Moabite shall not enter the assembly
of the LORD; even to the tenth generation none of his
descendants shall enter the assembly of the LORD
forever” (Deuteronomy 23:1-3). It is debated what is
meant by entering the congregation. Some popular
ideas are:
· These people are forbidden from worshipping
with the rest of the Israelites.
· These people are not allowed to hold office
in Israel.
· These people are not allowed to marry into
the Israelite community.
The last makes the most sense because Nehemiah
13:1-3 mentions: “On that day they read from the Book
of Moses in the hearing of the people, and in it was
found written that no Ammonite or Moabite should
ever come into the assembly of God, because they had
not met the children of Israel with bread and water,
but hired Balaam against them to curse them. However, our God turned the curse into a blessing. So it was,
when they had heard the Law, that they separated all
the mixed multitude from Israel.”
The later understand also matches Jesus’ reference
to eunuchs. The topic under discussion was marriage
and the sins that might result from an improper marriage. The disciples’ reaction to the statement that a
marriage could only be ended before death by a divorce for the cause of fornication was one of shock.
They went to the extreme and declared that if this was
true, then people should forget about marriage (i.e.
remain celibate their whole life).
Jesus said that three kinds people would remain
celibate:
Natural born eunuchs: Birth defects occurred
even in these ancient days. Even today, 1.5% of the
men in the United States are born with undescended
testicles. Fortunately, modern surgery enables these
men to live a normal life by moving the testicles to
their proper position. But without such surgery in
Jesus’ day, these men would be eunuchs.
Made eunuchs by men : Accidents do happen
and a crushed or amputated testicle is not repairable.
Yet it remained a practice in these ancient days to castrate men either for job position or in punishment for
some crimes.
Chose to be eunuchs: Here we are not referring
to men physically castrating themselves, but those who
chose to live like a eunuch (i.e. without marriage or
celibate).
Marriage was forbidden and not practical anyway
for men in the first two categories, but Jesus said that
some would chose the celibate life for the sake of the
being in the church. Such would arise from people
who have made a mess of their early marriages that
leave them in a position where they cannot remarry
without committing adultery. Such people would value Christianity more than living a life of sin for personal satisfaction. In addition, there are some so involved in the kingdom that marriage would interfere
with their work, such as the Apostle Paul (I Corinthians 7:8).
No where is there even a hint of homosexuality in
Matthew 19. Marriage is defined as being between a
man and a woman. “And He answered and said to
them, “Have you not read that He who made them at
the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said,
‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become
one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one
flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not
man separate”” (Matthew 19:4-6). Sexual relations
outside of marriage is condemned (fornication and
adultery). The discussion about eunuchs is about foregoing marriage. Since sex is only allowed within marriage (Hebrews 13:4), Jesus is not saying that some
people are natural born homosexuals, he is talking
about men who are unable to have sex or chose to
forego sexual relations by not marrying.
AN ANSWER TO RESEARCH
land shall yield her increase, and the trees of the field
shall yield their fruit.
5And your threshing shall reach unto the vintage,
and the vintage shall reach unto the sowing time: and
ye shall eat your bread to the full, and dwell in your
land safely.
6And I will give peace in the land, and ye shall lie
down, and none shall make you afraid: and I will rid
evil beasts out of the land, neither shall the sword go
through your land.
7And ye shall chase your enemies, and they shall
fall before you by the sword.
8And five of you shall chase an hundred, and an
hundred of you shall put ten thousand to flight: and
your enemies shall fall before you by the sword.
9For I will have respect unto you, and make you
fruitful, and multiply you, and establish my covenant
with you.
10And ye shall eat old store, and bring forth the
old because of the new.
11And I set my tabernacle among you: and my
soul shall not abhor you.
12And I will walk among you, and will be your
God, and ye shall be my people.
Scientific research continually vasilates back and
forth between ‘born that way’ and ‘a chosen life style’.
Why? The answer is seen in the scripture.
Exodus 20:5
Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve
them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto
the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;
Exodus 34:7
Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity
and transgression and sin, and that will by no means
clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon
the children, and upon the children’s children, unto
the third and to the fourth generation.
Leviticus 26
1Ye shall make you no idols nor graven image,
neither rear you up a standing image, neither shall ye
set up any image of stone in your land, to bow down
unto it: for I am the LORD your God.
2Ye shall keep my sabbaths, and reverence my
sanctuary: I am the LORD.
3If ye walk in my statutes, and keep my commandments, and do them;
4Then I will give you rain in due season, and the
Continued on page 8
WHAT? SAINTHOOD?
You’ve Got To Be Kidding!
Forwarded to us by Larry Meaux - Winnie, TX
Whew! On a Saturday afternoon, in Washington ,
D. C., an aide to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi visited
the Bishop of the Catholic cathedral in D.C. He told
the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending the
next day’s Mass, and he asked if the Cardinal would
kindly point out Pelosi to the congregation and say a
few words that would include calling Pelosi a saint.
The Cardinal replied, “No. I don’t really like the
woman, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Pelosi’s views.”
Pelosi’s aide then said, “Look. I’ll write a check
here and now for a donation of $100,000 to your church
if you’ll just tell the congregation you see Pelosi as a
saint.”
The Cardinal thought about it and said, “Well, the
church can use the money, so I’ll work your request
into tomorrow’s sermon.”
As Pelosi’s aide promised, House Speaker Pelosi
appeared for the Sunday worship and seated herself
prominently at the forward left side of the center aisle.
As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed out that Speaker Pelosi was present.
The Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, “While Speaker Pelosi’s presence is probably an
honor to some, the woman is not numbered among
my personal favorite personages. Some of her most
egregious views are contrary to tenets of the Church,
and she tends to flip-flop on many other issues.
Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite,
a thumb sucker, and a nit-wit.
Nancy Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a
thief. I must say, Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of
a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed.
She married for money and is using her wealth to
lie to the American people.
She has a reputation for shirking her Representative obligations both in Washington , and in California . The woman is simply not to be trusted.”
The Cardinal concluded, “But, when
compared with President Obama, House
Speaker Pelosi is a saint.”
Please contact Viagra, Ask if they still have
enough product to send some to OBAMA.
Perhaps the real stuff will help him get over the
urge for more stimulus if he can be encouraged
to use enough for one of the four hour kind. I am
certain that he will suffer less from that than his
party is from his previous stimulus packages.
THE SPOKESMEN
From page 7
8
The Peoples Voice
CONSEQUENCES OF IDOLATRY AND HOMOSEXUALITY
13I am the LORD your God, which
brought you forth out of the land of
Egypt, that ye should not be their bondmen; and I have broken the bands of
your yoke, and made you go upright.
14But if ye will not hearken unto me,
and will not do all these commandments;
15And if ye shall despise my statutes, or if your soul abhor my judgments,
so that ye will not do all my commandments, but that ye break my covenant:
16I also will do this unto you; I will
even appoint over you terror, consumption, and the burning ague, that shall
consume the eyes, and cause sorrow of
heart: and ye shall sow your seed in
vain, for your enemies shall eat it.
17And I will set my face against you,
and ye shall be slain before your enemies: they that hate you shall reign over
you; and ye shall flee when none pursueth you.
18And if ye will not yet for all this
hearken unto me, then I will punish you
seven times more for your sins.
19And I will break the pride of your
power; and I will make your heaven as
iron, and your earth as brass:
20And your strength shall be spent
in vain: for your land shall not yield her
increase, neither shall the trees of the
land yield their fruits.
21And if ye walk contrary unto me,
and will not hearken unto me; I will
bring seven times more plagues upon
you according to your sins.
22I will also send wild beasts
among you, which shall rob you of your
children, and destroy your cattle, and
make you few in number; and your high
ways shall be desolate.
23And if ye will not be reformed by
me by these things, but will walk contrary unto me;
24Then will I also walk contrary
unto you, and will punish you yet seven
times for your sins.
25And I will bring a sword upon
you, that shall avenge the quarrel of my
covenant: and when ye are gathered together within your cities, I will send the
pestilence among you; and ye shall be
delivered into the hand of the enemy.
26And when I have broken the staff
of your bread, ten women shall bake
your bread in one oven, and they shall
deliver you your bread again by weight:
and ye shall eat, and not be satisfied.
27And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28Then I will walk contrary unto
you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29And ye shall eat the flesh of your
sons, and the flesh of your daughters
shall ye eat.
30And I will destroy your high places, and cut down your images, and cast
your carcases upon the carcases of your
idols, and my soul shall abhor you.
31And I will make your cities waste,
and bring your sanctuaries unto desolation, and I will not smell the savour of
your sweet odours.
32And I will bring the land into desolation: and your enemies which dwell
therein shall be astonished at it.
33And I will scatter you among the
heathen, and will draw out a sword after you: and your land shall be desolate, and your cities waste.
34Then shall the land enjoy her sabbaths, as long as it lieth desolate, and
ye be in your enemies’ land; even then
shall the land rest, and enjoy her sabbaths.
35As long as it lieth desolate it shall
rest; because it did not rest in your sabbaths, when ye dwelt upon it.
36And upon them that are left alive
of you I will send a faintness into their
hearts in the lands of their enemies; and
the sound of a shaken leaf shall chase
them; and they shall flee, as fleeing from
a sword; and they shall fall when none
pursueth.
37And they shall fall one upon another, as it were before a sword, when
none pursueth: and ye shall have no
power to stand before your enemies.
38And ye shall perish among the
heathen, and the land of your enemies
shall eat you up.
39And they that are left of you shall
pine away in their iniquity in your enemies’ lands; and also in the iniquities of
their fathers shall they pine away with
them.
40If they shall confess their iniquity, and the iniquity of their fathers, with
their trespass which they trespassed
against me, and that also they have
walked contrary unto me;
41And that I also have walked contrary unto them, and have brought them
into the land of their enemies; if then
their uncircumcised hearts be humbled,
and they then accept of the punishment
of their iniquity:
42Then will I remember my covenant with Jacob, and also my covenant
with Isaac, and also my covenant with
Abraham will I remember; and I will remember the land.
43The land also shall be left of them,
and shall enjoy her sabbaths, while she
lieth desolate without them: and they
shall accept of the punishment of their
iniquity: because, even because they
despised my judgments, and because
their soul abhorred my statutes.
44And yet for all that, when they be
in the land of their enemies, I will not
cast them away, neither will I abhor
them, to destroy them utterly, and to
break my covenant with them: for I am
the LORD their God.
45But I will for their sakes remember the covenant of their ancestors,
whom I brought forth out of the land of
Egypt in the sight of the heathen, that I
might be their God: I am the LORD.
46These are the statutes and judgments and laws, which the LORD made
between him and the children of Israel
in mount Sinai by the hand of Moses.
What one of us would wish the
above consequences upon America and
it’s children?
Is a few moments of sexual pleasure actually worth the price God has
placed upon them?
After all is said and done, isn’t that
what homosexuality is all about? A few
moments if ‘unlawful sex’, born of inordinate sexual appetite, with the feeble excuse, “I was bor that way.”
Everyone is born ‘dead’ in trespasses and sin. Each of us must make decisions as to what we do with our lives.
Many of my forefathers were prone
to drink; so, at the age of 8 I became an
alcoholic. That part of my life was an
expression of the iniquity of the fathers
visited to the third and fourth generation, as the scripture declared it would
be.
Do you want your children to be
homosexual? Simply practice homosexuality and they will be.
Because my family loved me
enough to pray for me during my 28
years of drunckeness, God had mercy,
forgave my iniquities and set me free.
In the case of homosexuality, the
price of freedom may be a great deal
higher. Homosexuality is an abomination; therefore, God won’t look upon the
homosexual to draw him unto Himself.
That means that any approach unto
God must be made by the homosexual
hungering and thirsting for God, rather
than by God’s spirit drawing the homosexual unto Himself.
That places the homosexual in the
greatest jeopardy to hell, both in his
present life and in his life after death.
“As for me and my house, we will
serve the lord.
Throughout the centuries, every
nation that chose to embrace homosexuality as an acceptable life style,
collapsed into chaos within a hundred years.
We can see that taking place in
America, today.
POTLUCK CENTER
Central Location - Affordable for meetings of 20 or more
LARGE ROOM SEATS UP TO 100 CLASSROOM STYLE
Kitchen and food service available - Quiet atmosphere - Sound system available
Not available Sundays - Call (575) 551-1771
Sent to us by
Michael Belver
Jim Neugent in Mena
, Arkansas Writes To ABC
Network
Jim Writes:
My name is Jim Neugent. I wrote
to ABC (on-line) concerning a programcalled ‘THE PRACTICE.’
In last nights episode, one of the
lawyer’s mothers decided she is gay and
wanted her son to go to court and help
her get a marriage license so she could
marry her ‘partner.’
I sent the following letter to ABC
yesterday and really did not expect a reply, but I did get one.
My original message was:
ABC is obsessed with the subject
of homosexuality. I will no longer watch
any of your attempts to convince the
world that homosexuality is OK.
‘THE PRACTICE’ can be a fairly
good show, but last night’s program was
so typical of your agenda. You picked
the ‘dufus’ of the office to be the one
who was against the idea of his mother
being gay, and made him look like a
whiner because he had convictions. This
type of mentality calls people like me a
‘gay basher.’
Read the first chapter of Romans
(that’s in the Bible); and see what the
apostle Paul had to say about it..... He,
God and Jesus were all ‘gay bashers’
What if she’d fallen in love with her
cocker spaniel? Is that an alternative life
style? (By the way, the Bible speaks
against that, too.) —Jim Neugent
Here is ABC’s reply from the ABC
on-line webmaster:
How about getting your nose out of
the Bible (which is ONLY a book of stories compiled by MANY different writers hundreds of years ago) and read the
declaration of independence (what our
nation is built on), where it says ‘All
Men are Created equal,’ and try treating
them that way for a change!
Or better yet, try thinking for yourself and stop using an archaic book of
stories as your lame crutch for your existence. You are in the minority in this
country, and your boycott will not affect us at ABC or our freedom of statement.
Jim Neugent’s second response to
ABC:
Thanks for your reply. From your
harsh reply, evidently I hit a nerve. I will
share it with all of whom I come in contact. Hopefully, the Arkansas Democrat
Newspaper will include it in one of their
columns and I will be praying for you.
--Jim Neugent --Note: Wouldn’t
Satan just love it if people stopped using the Bible for a crutch?
MAKES SENSE TO ME
Time between slipping on a peel
and smacking the pavement:
‘1 Bananosecond’
THE SPOKESMEN
9
WE
The People
Gene Crouch
An Invitation to the Tea Party
“The Tea Party” is a grassroots movement of ordinary citizens concerned about the growth and conduct
of government. Local Tea Party groups have sprung
up all over the country and are already making a visible difference in American politics. This movement
has baffled the media and struck fear into the hearts of
politicians of both major parties. Tea Party endorsements and support have helped candidates like Scott
Brown win the Senate seat in Massachusetts earlier
this year, as well as handing primary victories to folks
like Rand Paul, Kentucky, Joe Miller, Alaska, Sharron
Angle, Nevada, Mark Rubio, Florida, and Christine
O’Donnell, Vermont. Incumbents from both parties
have already lost in the primaries and I expect more
will be looking for work after the Nov. 2 general election.
While the liberal media and democrats attempt the
portray Tea Party members as “right-wing wackos,
rednecks and racists,” the ones I’ve come to know are
just ordinary people who love this country and its
founding principles and concerned enough with the
way our country is being run that they have chosen to
stand up and exercise their constitutional right to redress the government with their grievances. These
grievances include the rising growth and associated
debt of the Federal Government and the abuse of the
power of the government beyond its constitutional limits. If you share these concerns, you are at least a Tea
Party member in spirit. The Otero County Tea Party
Patriots invite you to join and take an active part in
throwing out the tax and spend politicians and replacing them with new ones who we hope will have some
understanding about how to balance a budget.
SPECIAL
ANNOUNCEMENT
Spanish Services
each Sunday
2:00 PM until 6:00 PM
Fellowship over a potluck dinner
After prayer, praise and worship
THE GATHERING
PLACE
1601 Hawii Ave
Alamogordo, NM 88311
(575) 551-1771
Our government has been operating at a deficit
for decades. The political system from top to bottom
is corrupted by special interest lobbyists, giant corporations and giant investment banks. The U.S. Treasury
is run by former Goldman Sachs and Federal Reserve
officials who are the same people who were in charge
of the economy when it fell on its face in 2007-08 and
are now still in charge! Their only solution to restoring the economy is to continue doing what was done
to get us here in the first place...print more money,
spend more money, and go further into debt!
When Obama won the presidential election with
veto-proof Democratic majorities in both the house and
senate, he took over the responsibility of managing
the worst economic recession since the Great Depression. The Democrats passed a massive $1 trillion economic stimulus plan that rewarded Acorn, the Unions
and their other political cronies, but didn’t create very
many new jobs. Most of the first-year efforts of the
executive and legislative branches were directed toward shoving an ill-conceived and unpopular National Health Care Reform Bill down the throats of the
American Public. The final bill, which was over 2,700
pages long and unread by 99% of the congress, was
weasled through Capitol hill by parliamentary sleight
of hand after gaining initial passage by bribing congressmen with sweetheart deals and kickbacks like
“Cornhusker Kickback” and the “Louisanna Purchase”.
I seriously doubt anyone will hear any Democrat bragging about voting for that bill in any campaign speech
this fall.
Now the Obama White House wants to tax the very
air we breathe with his insiduous “Cap and trade” tax
America faces two crises that should be addressed by all thinking voters. The first and most
important is a leadership vacuum that is obvious to
even the casual observer.
The second crisis that is insidious, yet dangerous to freedom and liberties is our uncontrolled judiciary system.
It has almost completely robbed us of our rural
industries, in collusion with grotesquely skewed
foundations, ‘saving us from ourselves.’
The thoughts and words of Thomas Jefferson are
appropriate and follow: The greatest threat to the
Rule of Law and constitutional limitations on central government was an unbridled judiciary:
“the original error was in establishing a judiciary independent of the nation, and which, from the
citadel of the law, can turn it guns on those they were
meant to defend, and control and fashion their proceedings to its own will.
Dear Editor:
I was so surprised to read in The Spokesmen that
some of the stores in Alamogordo would rather have
radical liberals and homosexuals visit their stores than
god fearing people who comprise most of our nation’s
population.
Maybe we should find other stores to shop at. It is
not as though we have to buy their goods or eat at their
restaurants. I am not forced to shop at Lowe’s grocery
store or eat at Golden Corral.
It is a shame that we let undesirables how and who
The Peoples Voice
proposal designed to save our planet from climate
change. This law would tax everything from auto emissions to cow flattulation. The very idea that any government can prevent the climate from doing whatever
it wants to do is almost as absurd as this proposed new
law to combat it. While trying to sell this onerous law
to the public, the federal government has at the same
time abdicated its real responsibility of defending the
nation’s borders against a flood of illegal immigration
and has even taken Arizona to Federal court for attempting to do the job itself.
The people are growing weary of supporting a
government that ignores the principles that inspired
the creation of this country, from the Declaration of
Independence to the U.S. Constitution and the Bill of
Rights. They are concerned with the unbridled growth
of government and its intrusions into the lives of its
people and the growing deficits and taxes required to
support that growth. The U.S. Constitution was written to limit the government’s powers over the people,
because the founders recognized the dangers of government out of control. They had a big tea party in
1773 to protest British taxes and political abuses and
today concerned people supporting the Tea Party are
reminding the politicians of what happened 237 years
ago.
The new Tea Party is made up of ordinary people
who are dissatisfied with the way our country is being
managed and are working to make a few improvements
... starting with the removal of incumbent policians
who vote for their own self-interests and special interests rather than for the good of the American People.
We don’t care what party you belong to or the color of your skin. If you care about your country’s future and are tired of being lied to and cheated by the
people you elected to represent you, then join us in
working for a better government that observes its constitutional limitations and actually works to serve the
true public interest.
If you would like be notified of future the Otero
County Tea Party activities, please send an email to
[email protected] and ask to be added
to our mailing list.
The opinion which gives to the judges the right
to decide what laws are constitutional and what not,
not only for themselves in their own sphere of action
but for the Legislature and Executive also in their
spheres, would make the Judiciary a despotic branch.”
Jefferson understood that should our Constitution ever become a straw man for a politicized judiciary to interpret as it pleased, Rule of Law would
gradually yield to rule of men—the terminus of the
latter being tyranny. Are we there yet?
Don Omey heads up the Tea
Party in Otero County, NM.
The Tea Party has remained
very active during the chirade
of Barack ‘Hussien’ Obama
and may well be the only
voice willing to see this
would be dictator crushed!
Don Omey
we sell to. Why not let them search for other places or
be silent. If they don’t want to read the truth they should
just leave The Spokesmen on the shelf. No one is forcing them to read it.
Peggy Talley
Editors Comment:
It is not the desire of the Spokesmen to force it’s viewpoints on anyone; however, perhaps the public should let
their views be known as Peggy has. If a single liberal or
homosexual voice can get The Spokesmen boycotted by a
store, Your’s might get it reinstated.
THE SPOKESMEN
10
Here’s an opinion piece by Chuck Green who writes “Greener Pastures” for the
Denver Post Aurora Sentinel...one of the more liberal papers in the country.
Additionally, Mr. Green is a life-long Democrat...so this is rather a stunning piece.
CHUCK
GREEN
GREENER
PASTURES
IT IS ALL BUSH’S FAULT
Obama is victim of Bush’s failed
promises Greener Pastures — 5/15/10
Barack Obama is setting a recordsetting number of records during his
first year in office?
Largest budget ever.
? Largest deficit ever.
? Largest number of broken promises
? Most self-serving speeches ever.
? Largest number of agenda-setting
failures ever.
? Fastest dive in popularity ever.
Wow! Talk about change
Just one year ago, fresh from his
inauguration celebrations, President
Obama was flying high. After one of the
nation’s most inspiring political campaigns, the election of America’s first
black president had captured the hopes
and dreams of millions.
To his devout followers, it was inconceivable that a year later his administration would be gripped in self-imposed crisis.
Of course, they don’t see it as selfimposed. It’s all George Bush’s fault.
George Bush, who doesn’t have a vote
in congress and who no longer occupies
the White House, is to blame for it all.
He broke Obama’s promise to put all
bills on the White House web site for
five days before signing them.
He broke Obama’s promise to have the
congressional health care negotiations
broadcast live on C-SPAN.
He broke Obama’s promise to end
earmarks.He broke Obama’s promise to
keep unemployment from rising above
8 percent.
G
O
D
B
L
E
S
S
U
S
A
He broke Obama’s promise to close
the detention center at Guantanamo in
the first year.
He broke Obama’s promise to make
peace with direct, no precondition talks
with America’s most hate-filled enemies
during his first year in office, ushering
in a new era of global cooperation.
He broke Obama’s promise to end
the hiring of former lobbyists into high
White House jobs.He broke Obama’s
promise to end no-compete contracts
with the government.
He broke Obama’s promise to disclose the names of all attendees at closed
White House meetings.
He broke Obama’s promise for a
new era of bipartisan cooperation in all
matters.
He broke Obama’s promise to have
chosen a home church to attend Sunday
services with his family by Easter of last
year.
Yes, it’s all George Bush’s fault.
President Obama is nothing more than
a puppet in the never-ending failed Bush
administration.
If only George Bush wasn’t still in
charge, all of President Obama’s problems would be solved. His promises
would have been kept, the economy
would be back on track, Iran would have
stopped its work on developing a nuclear bomb and would be negotiating a
peace treaty with Israel.
North Korea would have ended its
tyrannical regime, and integrity would
have been restored to the federal government.
Oh, and did I mention what it would
be like if the Democrats, under the lead-
The Peoples Voice
ership of Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid,
didn’t have the heavy yoke of George
Bush around their necks?
There would be no ear marks, no
closed-door drafting of bills, no increase in deficit spending, no specialinterest influence (unions), no vote
buying (Nebraska, Louisiana).
If only George Bush wasn’t still in
charge, we’d have real change by now.
All the broken promises, all the failed
legislation and delay (health care reform, immigration reform) is not President Obama’s fault or the fault of the
Democrat-controlled Congress. It’s all
George Bush’s fault.
Take for example the decision of
Eric Holder, the president’s attorney
general, to hold terrorists’ trials in New
York City. Or his decision to try the
Christmas Day underpants bomber as
a civilian.
Two disastrous decisions.Certainly
those were bad judgments based on
poor advice from George Bush.
Need more proof?
You might recall that when Scott
Brown won the election to the U.S.
Senate from Massachusetts, capturing
“the Ted Kennedy seat”, President
Obama said that Brown’s victory was
the result of the same voter anger that
propelled Obama into office in 2008.
People were still angry about
George Bush and the policies of the
past 10 years, and they wanted change.
Yes, according to the president, the
voter rebellion in Massachusetts was
George Bush’s fault.
Therefore, in retaliation, they
elected a Republican to the Ted
Kennedy seat, ending a half-century of
domination by Democrats. It is all
George Bush’s fault.
Will the failed administration of
George Bush ever end, and the time for
hope and change ever arrive?
Will President Obama ever accept responsibility for something... - anything?
(Chuck Green is a veteran
Colorado journalist and former
editor-in-chief of The Denver Post.)
Shared with us by Gene Crouch
TEA PARTY SUCCEEDS AGAIN!
Billboard A Done Deal
THE SPOKESMEN
11
The Peoples Voice
WHERE DID ALL OF THE LEADERS GO?
By Lee Iacocca
Remember Lee Iacocca, the man who rescued
Chrysler Corporation from its death throes? He’s now
82 years old and has a new book, ‘Where Have All
The Leaders Gone?’.
Lee Iacocca Says: ‘Am I the only guy in this country who’s fed up with what’s happening? Where the
hell is our outrage with this so called president? We
should be screaming bloody murder! We’ve got a gang
of tax cheating clueless leftists trying to steer our ship
of state right over a cliff, we’ve got corporate gangsters stealing us blind, and we can’t even run a ridiculous cash-for-clunkers program without losing $26
billion of the taxpayers’ money, much less build a
hybrid car. But instead of getting mad, everyone sits
around and nods their heads when the politicians say,
‘trust me the economy is getting better..’
Better? You’ve got to be kidding. This is America
not the damned, ‘Titanic’. I’ll give you a sound bite:
‘Throw all the Democrats out along with Obama!’
You might think I’m getting senile, that I’ve gone
off my rocker, and maybe I have. But someone has to
speak up. I hardly recognize this country anymore..
The most famous business leaders are not the innovators but the guys in handcuffs. While we’re fiddling in Afghanistan , Iran is completing their nuclear
bombs and missiles and nobody seems to know what
to do. And the liberal press is waving ‘pom-poms’ instead of asking hard questions. That’s not the promise
of the ‘ America ‘ my parents and yours traveled across
the ocean for.
I’ve had enough. How about you? I’ll go a step
further. You can’t call yourself a patriot if you’re not
outraged. This is a fight I’m ready and willing to have.
The Biggest ‘C’ is Crisis! (Iacocca elaborates on
nine C’s of leadership, with crisis being the first) .
Leaders are made, not born. Leadership is forged
in times of crisis. It’s easy to sit there with thumb up
your butt and talk theory. Or send someone else’s kids
off to war when you’ve never seen a battlefield yourself. It’s another thing to lead when your world comes
tumbling down.
On September 11, 2001, we needed a strong leader more than any other time in our history. We needed
OFFICE HUMOR
I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I
knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave.
I thought that maybe if I acted ‘Crazy’ then he
would tell me to take a few days off. So I hung
upside-down on the ceiling and made funny, silly
noises.
My co-worker (who’s blonde) asked me what
I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be
a light bulb so that the Boss might think I was
‘Crazy’ and give me a few days off.
A few minutes later the Boss came into the
a steady hand to guide us out of the ashes. A hell of a
mess, so here’s where we stand.
We’re immersed in a bloody war now with no plan
for winning and no plan for leaving. But our soldiers
are dying daily. We’re running the biggest deficit in
the history of the world, and it’s getting worse every
day! We’ve lost the manufacturing edge to Asia while
our once-great companies are getting slaughtered by
health care costs.
Gas prices are going to skyrocket again and nobody in power has a lucid plan to open drilling to solve
the problem. This country has the largest oil reserves
in the WORLD, and we cannot drill for it because the
politicians have been bought by the flea-hugging environmentalists.
Our schools are in a complete disaster because of
the teachers union. Our borders are like sieves and
they want to give all illegals amnesty and free healthcare. The middle class is being squeezed to death every day. These are times that cry out for leadership.
But when you look around, you’ve got to ask , Â
‘Where have all the leaders gone?’ Where are the curious, creative communicators? Where are the people
of character, courage, conviction, omnipotence, and
common sense? I may be a sucker for alliteration, but
I think you get the point. Name me a leader who has a
better idea for homeland security than making us take
off our shoes in airports and throw away our shampoo?
We’ve spent billions of dollars building a huge
new bureaucracy, and all we know how to do is react
to things that have already happened.
Everyone’s hunkering down, fingers crossed, hoping the government will make it better for them. Now,
that’s just crazy. Deal with life.
Name me an industry leader who is thinking creatively about how we can restore our competitive edge
in manufacturing. Who would have believed that there
could ever be a time when ‘The Big Three’ referred to
Japanese car companies? How did this happen ? and
more important, look what Obama did about it!
Name me a government leader who can articulate
a plan for paying down the debt, or solving the ener-
gy crisis, or managing the health care problem. The
silence is deafening. But these are the crises that are
eating away at our country and milking the middle
class dry.
I have news for the Chicago gangsters in Congress. We didn’t elect you to turn this country into a
losing European Socialist state.
What is everybody so afraid of? That some bonehead on NBC or CNN news will call them a name?
Give me a break. Why don’t you guys show some spine
for a change?
Had enough? Hey, I’m not trying to be the voice
of gloom and doom here. I’m trying to light a fire. I’m
speaking out because I have hope - I believe in America . In my lifetime I’ve had the privilege of living
through some of America ‘s greatest moments. I’ve
also experienced some of our worst crises:
The ‘Great Depression,’ ‘World War II,’ the ‘Korean War,’ the ‘Kennedy Assassination,’ the ‘Vietnam
War,’ the 1970’s oil crisis, and the struggles of recent
years since 9/11.
Make your own contribution by sending this to
everyone you know and care about. It’s our country,
folks, and it’s our future. Our future is at stake!!
office and asked, ‘What in the name of GOD are
you doing?’
I told him I was a light bulb. He said, ‘You
are clearly stressed out.’ Go home, recuperate and
rest for a couple of days.’
I jumped down and walked out of the office...
When my co-worker (the blonde) followed
me, the Boss asked her, ‘..And where do you
think you’re going?!’
(You’re going to love this....)
She said, ‘I’m going home, too. I can’t work
in the dark .
“QUOTE OF THE CENTURY”
Some people have the vocabulary to sum up
things in a way you can understand. This quote
came from the Czech Republic .
“The danger to America is not Barack
Obama, but a citizenry capable of entrusting a
man like him with the Presidency.
It will be far easier to limit and undo the follies of an Obama presidency than to restore the
necessary common sense and good judgment to
a depraved electorate, willing to have such a man
for their president.
The problem is much deeper and far more
serious than Mr. Obama, who is a mere symptom of what ails America. Blaming the prince
of the fools should not blind anyone to the vast
confederacy of fools that made him their prince.
The Republic can survive a Barack Obama,
who is, after all, merely a fool. It is less likely
to survive a multitude of fools such as those who
made him their President.”
SIMPLY THE BEST
12th at New York - Alamogordo, NM
THE SPOKESMEN
12
A friend of mine just started his own business, making
landmines that look like prayer rugs.
from the patriot post
http://patriotpost.us/
I recently submitted a building
permit application for a new house.
It was going to be 100 ft. tall and
400 ft. wide with 9 gun turrets at
various heights and windows all
over the place and a loud outside
entertainment sound system. It
would have had parking for 200 cars
and I was going to paint it snot green
with pink trim.
The City Council told me to forget
about it.
So, I sent the application in again,
but this time I called it a Mosque.
Work starts on Monday.
Biden rushed into the Oval office in
a panic. It seems that he had just
discovered that there were more than
700,000 ‘Cattle Gaurds’ being used
in the Continental USA.
“Sir”, he shouted, “Are you aware
that there are more than 700,000
Cattle Guards being used in our
country at this very moment?”
In his usual matter of fact way,
Obama replied, “We will honorably
discharge them immediately.”
“But Sir”, Biden exclaimed, “ The
new regulations concerning Veterans
will force us to retrain them for
civilian positions prior to discharge!
Think of the expense!”
If you haven’t gotten it yet, heaven help you.
You may be one of the guards; or, perhaps one
of the cows they guard!
Let’s vote on this now
Bill Clinton, George Bush, and
Ronald Reagan are in a boat in the Potomac, when suddenly the boat develops a leak. They have only one life preserver jacket.
Bill says: “Let’s do the Democratic
thing. Take a vote to see who gets the
life preserver.” They each write a name
on a piece of paper and stuff it in a coffee can. Bush and Reagan get one vote
each; Clinton gets six.
The Peoples Voice
It’s doing well. He says Prophets are
going through the roof
Wilbah was working at the sawmill
and he cut his hand off.
They put his hand in a plastic bag
and they sewed it back on and he was
back to work before the morning break.
After the break Wilbah fell in front
of the saw and his leg was cut off.
They put his leg in a plastic bag and
they sewed it back on and he was back
to work before lunch.
After lunch Wilbah was a little wobbly and he fell head first into the saw
and his head was cut off.
They put his head in a plastic bag
and sent him off to the hospital.
Come afternoon break Wilbah
wasn’t back to work.
His coworkers were starting to
worry....he only cut his head off. He
should be back by now.
By afternoon break they learned
Wilbah.......passed away.
Wilbah suffocated.
GOLF!
Two men were golfing, and the
fairway of the hole they were
playing was adjacent to a road. The
first man was setting up for his
swing, when a funeral procession
went by on the road. He stopped,
faced the procession for a moment,
then bowed his head in prayer as
the hearse passed by. Only when
the procession had passed out of
view did he resume playing,
driving his ball to the green.
As they were walking toward the
green, the second man said, “That
was a touching show of respect for
the the deceased back there. I had
no idea you were so sentimental.”
The first man shrugged and said,
“It’s the least I could do. I was
married to her for thirty years.”
The roundest knight at King Arthur’s
round table was - Sir Cumference. He
acquired his size from too much pi.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an
Alaskan island, - but it turned out to be
an optical Aleutian .
She was only a whisky maker, - but
he loved her still.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class - because it was a
weapon of math disruption.
The butcher backed into the meat
grinder - and got a little behind in his
work.
No matter how much you push the
envelope, - it’ll still be stationery.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the
road - and was cited for littering.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in
France - would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
Two silk worms had a race. - They
ended up in a tie.
Time flies like an arrow. - Fruit flies
like a banana.
A hole has been found in the nudist
camp wall. - The police are looking into
it.
Atheism - is a non-prophet organization.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack
in the hallway. - One hat said to the other, ‘You stay here, I’ll go on a head.’
I wondered why the baseball kept
getting bigger.- Then, it hit me.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab
center said, - ‘Keep off the Grass.’
A small boy swallowed some coins
and was taken to a hospital. - His grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a
nurse said, ‘No change yet.’
A chicken crossing the road - is poultry in motion.
The short fortune-teller who escaped
from prison - was a small medium at
large.
The man who survived mustard gas
and pepper spray - is now a seasoned
veteran.
A backward poet - writes inverse.
In democracy, it’s your vote that
counts. - In feudalism, it’s your count
that votes.
When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
Don’t join dangerous cults: - Practice safe sects.
Submitted by former Emmitsburg
Mayor Ed!
Terms you should know
•Traffic light: Apparatus that
automatically turns red when
your car approaches.
•Divorce: Postgraduate in
school of love.
•Pioneer: Early American who
was lucky enough to find his way
out of the woods.
•People: Some make things
happen, some watch things
happen, and the majority has no
idea what’s happened.
•Swimming pool: A mob of
people with water in it.
•Self-control: The ability to eat
only one peanut.
•Salesman: Man with ability to
convince wife she’d look fat in
mink.
•Cannibal: Person who likes to
see other people stewed.
•Egocentric: A person who
believes he is everything you
know you are.
•Foreign film: Any movie
shown in Texas theater that isn’t
a western.
•Optimist: Girl who regards a
bulge as a curve.
•Magazine: Bunch of printed
pages that tell you what’s
coming in the next issue.
•College: The four-year period
when parents are permitted
access to the telephone.
•Emergency numbers: Police
station, fire department and
places that deliver.
•Opera: When a guy gets
stabbed in the back and instead
of bleeding he sings.
•Buffet: A French word that
means “get up and get it
yourself.”
•Baby-sitter: A teenager who
must behave like an adult so
that the adults who are out can
behave like teenagers.
•Tattoo: Permanent proof of
temporary insanity.
•Sermon: Unending Story.
•Peace Officer: Sleeping Cop
Submitted by Kenneth,
Shropshire, England